I. FUCKING. HATE. MOBILE. DEVELOPMENT.

I already manage the data, devops, infra, and most of the backend dev.

We had a mobile guy. He was great. I never had to think about it and kept moving quickly on my work. #SpecializationOfLaborFTW

He left. Why? Because they wouldn't give him a small raise despite being one of the best mobile engineers in the firm. WTF.

I made the mistake of picking up just enough slack on this workflow in the interim such that I'm, apparently, the fucking god-damned release manager, fixer of pipelines, fixer of build configs, fixer of anything where someone just needs to RTFM for a half-hour to not fucking break things.

Now, 8 months later...and, apparently, Fortune 500 companies are too fucking god-damned cheap to pay for someone who actually knows WTF they're doing for a very reasonable thing to have at least one dedicated set of eyes for.

I never wanted to be a mobile dev.
I never will want to be a mobile dev.
And I certainly don't want to manage your HALF-FACE-FUCKED detached expo configs.

There's a reason I never intentionally involved myself in mobile. All the way down, it's just shitty cross-compilation, transpilation, dependency-hell, brittle-as-fuck build processes so we can foot-gun and mouth-gun react-native and expo and babel and whatever the fuck else cargo-culted horseshit into the wild.

And why? What's the actual fucking root cause? The biggest white elephant that ever fucking elephant-ed? It's because Apple and Google decided to never collaborate on a truly-native cross-platform SDK--where engineers could write native code that compiles to native binaries that's simply write-once, run-everywhere. They know they could have done that, and they didn't. So what'd they get back? Expo--a too-cleverly-designed backdoor/hack--more-or-less a way to circumvent the sane release process software has usually followed: code -> executable -> deploy. Or code -> deploy (for interpreted langs). Expo's like "keep your same executable, we're just gonna to do updates by injecting new code into it whenever we want". Didn't we learn anything with web? Shit gets messy real quick? Not to mention: HEY EXPO, WE WERE ALREADY BUILDING NATIVE APPS, YOU SHORT-SIGHTED FUCKS. THANKS FOR LURING OUR CTOs INTO FORCING EXPO DOWN OUR THROATS W/ THE IMPLICIT (BUT INCORRECT) TOO-GOOD-TO-BE-TRUE PROMISE THAT WE CAN HAVE WRITE-ONCE, RUN-ANYWHERE WITHOUT ANY BUY-IN OR COOPERATION FROM THE ACTUAL TARGET PLATFORMS.

And, we just, like, accept this? We all know it's garbage engineering. The principles we learned in the classroom aren't just academic abstractions--they actually yield real-world results--and eschewing them yields real-world failures. Expo is tightly-coupled to high-heaven, with leaky abstractions six-ways-to-christmas, chock-full of foot-guns, and fails the most basic test of quality: does it, "just work?"

Expo is fucking shameful and it should fucking die. Its promises are too bold, its land-mines too many, its future-proof-ness is alway, always, always questionable as fuck and a risk to every project that uses it.

You want a rant? This is my fucking venue, 'tis not? Well, then this is a piss and vinegar rant straight from my blood-red, beating fucking heart:

EXPO FUCKING SUCKS. AND IF YOU'RE A FAN, YOU FUCKING SUCK TOO.

The illusion of choice...

Client so scared someone steal their code (even though we’re the one who make it), they block some access to internet website, also block nuget site

the exceptional 9%

Happy Christmas to all of you

Attend all the meetings, they said. They're super important, they said. You'll get more code done if we hyper-report on progress they said. The bugs are piling up and we need to have even more meetings, they said.

STOP SAYING THINGS AT ME AND LET ME FUCKING CODE YOU INSUFFERABLE CUNTS.

'Sup mates.
First rant...
So Here's a story of how I severely messed up my mental health trying to fit in university.

But the bonus: Found my passion.
Her we go,

Went to university thinking it'll be awesome to learn new stuff.
1st sem was pure shock - Programming was taught at the speed of V2 rockets.
Everything was centred around marks.

Wanted to get a good run in 2nd sem, started to learn Vector design, but RIP- Hospitalized for Staph infection, missed the whole sem and was in recovery for 3 months.
So asked uni for financial assistance as I had to re-register the courses the next semester. They flat out refused, not even in this serious of a case.

So, time to register courses for third semester, turns out most of the 2nd year courses are full, I had to take 3rd year courses like:
Social and Informational Networks
Human Computer Interaction
Image processing
And
Parallel and Distributed Computing (They had no prerequisites listed, for the cucks they are: BIG MISTAKE)
Turns out the first day of classes that I attend, the Image proc. teacher tells me that it's gonna be difficult for 2nd years so I drop it, as the PDC prof. also seconds that advice.

Time travel 2 months in: The PDC prof is a bitch, doesn't upload any notes at all and teaches like she's on Velocity-9 while treating this subject like a competition on who learns the most rather than helping everyone understand.
Doesn't let students talk to each other in lab even if one wants to clear their friend's doubt, "Do it on your own!" What the actual fuck?

Time for term end exams and project submission: Me and 3 seniors implement a Distributed File System in python and show it to her, she looks satisfied.
Project Results: Everyone else got 95/100
I got 76.
She's so prejudiced that she thinks that 2nd years must have been freeloaders while I put my ass on turbo for the whole sem, learning to code while tackling advanced concepts to the point that I hated to code.

I passed the course with a D grade.
People with zero consideration for others get absolutely zero respect from me.
Well it's safe to say that I went Nuclear(heh.. pun..) at this point, Mentally I was in such a bad place that I broke down.... Went into depression but didn't realise it.

But,
I met a senior in my HCI class that I did a project with, after which I discovered we had lots of similar interests.
We became good friends and started collaborating on design projects and video game prototyping.

Enter the 4th sem and holy mother of God did I got some bad bad profs....
Then it hit me
I have been here for two years, put myself through the meat grinder and tore my soul into shreds.
This Is Not Me
This Wont Be The End Of Me
I called up my sister in London and just vented all my emotions in front of her.
Relief.
Been a long time since I felt that.
I decided to go for what I truly feel passionate about: Game Design

So I am now trying to apply for Universities which have specialised courses for game design.

I've got my groove again, learnt to live again.
Learning C# now.
:)
It's been a long hello, and If you've reached till here somehow, then damn, you the MVP.
Peace.

dad to uncle: you know, my son is a programmer
uncle to me: what do you do son, as a programmer
me: catch bugs
uncle( thinking ): 🐞🐞🐝🐝
uncle: I hope you find a better job in the future!!

Me at an interview...
interviewer: can u solve a 3-sum problem
me: sir, a threesome is not a problem
interviewer: not threesome, 3-sum
me: OOOOO! that makes sense

Literally!!😂😂😂

Inflation in Crypto Trading.
That's what it looks like:

ATWOOD's Law

this is how I found this website:
me searching on google, "is java a piece of sh*t"
that's how I reached here

PHP stands for "Poor Helpless Programmers"

To,
GOOGLE CHROME

F**K U
the sh*ttiest browser ever

Thanking you,
yours faithfully,
annoyed developer

oh, sh*t...

WhatsApp web is the sh*ttiest web application I have ever seen in my life.

well, true

A picture speaks a lot more than words do...

Wishing you a very happy Diwali to me Indian mates.

i'd rather burn a site to the ground to preserve it in its current state than let it devolve into a place for SJWs to basically outlaw everything because they're special snowflakes. It's about breaking video games, you don't need to say "well you can't use he/she/him/her pronouns ever, you can't acknowledge binary genders, you can't say the word 'retarded' even when referring to the dictionary definition of the word (synonym of regression), you can't send PMs at all because privacy is against God, you can't say/reference God or Christianity because #NotAllReligions"

just fuck off. We break Pokemon games, we don't plot to genocide the white race because all whites are cis racist Nazi cucks like you do goddammit

;-;

Call me crazy but honestly, getting a segmentation fault in C/C++ makes my day joyful

Java or Python guys will never understand the feel you get when you end up getting segmentation fault in C/C++

Sitting in midst of nature with beer in hand and segmentation fault on screen.

WOW :) THAT'S WHAT WE CALL LIFE :)

PS: Although sometimes it's frustrating as hell

I cannot even function right now with how angry I am. If you're a python developer, don't take offence to this unless it describes you.

All the python devs I have ever met so far are pompous arrogant cucks that can't even get out of their own way to save themselves. They make EVERYTHING so fucking complicated and complex that the whole point to a project becomes moot.

Instead of understanding HOW a thing works, their answer is ALWAYS rewrite it how THEY want it to work.

They have what we used to call "little-man" syndrome. They're so concerned that they aren't perceived as intelligent that they overcompensate by making the wildest and most fucked up changes to a project I have EVER seen.

They have gone so far as to break the original functional components of a project just to meet THEIR definition of a healthy python project.

I don't hate the language, but GOD DAMN I HATE THE DEVS.

If this describes you, fuck you. Seriously, just fuck off into whatever python hole you crawled out of and stay there.

How about creating a new programming language named "C slang"

highlights from the language:
1. variable declaration :
by default, all declaration are var, but inorder
to declare a constant, write:
cunt a = 15; // means const a = 15;

2. input and output :
suck(b) // input stored in variable b
spit(b) // output b

3. function declaration:
f**k <function_name>(parameters);

4. null or None will be replaced by sh*t
for example: if(node root == sh*t)....

any other sh**y recommendation will be appreciable

C++ is a spiritual language.

I am getting the feeling of being a saint,
my mind seems to be in a whole new dimension,
My soul seemed to be out of my body for a few minutes,
and I can feel a sparkling elixir flowing throughout my body.

All these, after I grasp concepts such as functors, operator overloading, and container adaptors in C++

Aw Great...

So, I was just about to watch a tutorial on CSS.
Suddenly, an advertisement popped up.
"SO, YOU WANNA BE A FRONTEND ENGINEER AT GOOGLE".

long gone those days...

out of words...

random girl: words can't describe how ugly you look
me: words can't describe how beautiful you look
random girl: blushes :)
me: but numbers can...
me: 2/10

let's understand HTML
step 1: arrange a table
step 2: get some lemons
step 3: get a squeezer
step 4: cut the lemon in half and squeeze it
step 5: pour the lemon fluid into a glass tumbler
step 6: add some water and put a sucking straw
AND THERE YOU GO
you just understood HTML( How To Make Lemonade)

I might sound ridiculous but yeah, I am switching from C++ to java.
reason: I am bored sticking to a single language for 4 years.
Why not python?
reason: I use it every second day at my work.
Why this(java) shit? There are tons of other languages out there.
reason: java gives me PLEASURE
How drunk are you?
me: VERY

Everyday life of a programmer:
Crying, coding, crying, coding, crying, coding, crying, coding, crying, coding, crying, coding, crying, coding, crying, coding, crying, coding,
coding while crying...

!dev
Jesus Christ, if the cucks at this company don't start cleaning the coffee machine them-fucking-selves, I'm going to flip my shit.
There's been a chalk warning for about a month now and nobody is doing shit about it.
They leave the excess coffee powder in until either I clean it out or it literally starts to mold.
And it's not like they don't use it, everybody here drinks at least two cups a day, do you not care if it tastes at least a little all right!?
Nobody is ever going to get even a half decent cup out of this janky piece of shit.

Trying to learn CSS for the first time is equally fun and painful

C, C++, and Java are legacy programming languages.

So, for the ones who fear that the language will go away in mere 10-15 years. Chill. These languages will stay forever.

This was my source of motivation that dragged me towards the field of Computer Science and Engineering

other devs: Anime
me: Ben 10

It's only August but I already know what I'll be thankful for come Thanksgiving:
1. Our next president.
2. Integration tests.

Happy Independence Day to all Indian mates

I am currently a CS major, studying in a toxic university that teaches no more than old-school stuff.

I know HTML, CSS, and JS (self-taught), and at present, I am spending time on React.js.

I'm also a competitive programmer.

I badly wanna move out of this toxic educational environment and wanna do something that's worth spending time on.

I am feeling like I am just wasting both my time and money in this old-school university.

what should I do? help me out?

I am thinking that once I am fluent enough with HTML, CSS, JS, React, and some database stuff, I must start finding jobs in small startups.

badly need some guidance. PLEASE HELP ME...

Pure Legend

python

Guys, do you agree that C++ is getting overly complicated following the updated versions?

At times I wonder whether I should leave C++ and jump to python as my goto programming language.

Can we just for a moment recognize how absolutely fucked Windows update is?

I have done everything, EVERYTHING, outside of booting from a live Linux OS and permanently deleting the windows update executables. All this to stop windows from force updating and rebooting my system while it's locked.

I've killed services, schedules, edited the registry, changed group policy. I even set my wireless connection as metered. Fun fact about that, if MS deems the update to be "priority" they'll download it anyway and reboot, so fuck your data-cap.

I wouldn't have a problem with it IF they would put everything back the way it was before, but those fucking cucks can't even be bothered with doing that. But you bet your fucking sassy ass they start up all the bullshit services I disabled last update are all running.

I don't even know WHY I even try.

Doesn't matter anyway, in a few months I won't even be able to use half the tools I use on Windows for work due to licensing issues 🤷‍♂️

At that point I will give a big fucking finger to Windows 🖕 and use a VM for all the fucking work related bullshit.

Fuck you Microsoft, I would say it's been fun but you're a god damned disaster. I wish that I could send a message to the entire MS board on how much they have failed, but unfortunately I rather like my freedom and it's frowned upon sending rotting roadkill in the mail.

A poem for Programmers:

Why the FUCK is my VPN logging me out after a certain time. Its not like that I have to drive +4h to some remote location fix it when it cucks up at the wrong moment!

cool kids code in JavaScript

How we used to treat our computers back around 2000-2010 when they don't respond.
SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP !!
SLAP THE MONITOR !!

My most recent dream:

I come to the bookstore and see the 1000-something pages book called "We are not cucks". It's about how stoicism and how to defeat biases with thought experiments. The author is a German guy named ?.?.????rreize, I can't remember it precisely.

Everyone on the internet is discussing this book and why it is important. There are hashtags, influencers and virality.

Some time later the other book is released, 2500-something pages fundamental stuff called "We are cucks" with criticism of "We are not cucks" and whole new theory about why biases can't be defeated because of some "layers" IIRC.

In what programming language, you love to code the most?
edge case: if you don't love to code, then skip the question

Why are you paying me to architect your new stack if you're just going to mandate that I use Guice and Jersey "because that's what you're using already"? I'm sorry. You're wrong. Spring Boot is not a "dying technology". I'm not going to build you a servlet from scratch. Get fukt.

although JS is a mess, I don't understand the exponential rise in its popularity

you know what, PHP sucks, and if anyone asks ya "why?"
then tell them "because it sucks"

I'm literally facing a horrifying amount of hair fall every day since I started coding.

I just got a stackOverflow after nearly a year.

I am very thankful to C as I face less pain while dealing with pointers and memory allocation and deallocation in C++. I am very thankful to C++, as I grasp OOP and template concepts out of it and it was also my first language for DSAlgo implementation. I feel very fortunate to move to Java after C++ rather than python. Although Java's design is f**ked and it feeds on a computer's memory, it taught me to deal with objects( unlike C++). It taught me how objects are clearly different than primitive data types like int, float, char...And best of all, Java provided me everything I need to safely switch to Python, it's all because of Java, I can clearly understand the working of python. All the stuff which I find weird in python before is sounding logical to me now. As java taught me how to deal with objects, I am confident to say that "I CAN DEAL WITH PYTHON". With respect to all my 3 prior languages: C, C++, and Java.

Hey developers, am I allowed to make use of the pass-by-reference feature of C/C++ during a coding interview( given I am using C/C++ as my main language )?

I basically used python in my interviews, but this time I decided to go with C/C++.

now,
for those who gonna say "WRONG CATEGORY": most of you check rant rather than questions.

for those who gonna say "BUT YOUR NAME SUGGEST THAT YOU HATE C": bloody educate yourself.

The default file name, I use :
wtf.py
wtf.cpp
wtf.class
wtf.js
wtf.html
wtf.css
.
.
.

When the Problem setter doesn't want to type a lot...

Fuck companies that want you to build new systems that are a superset of what they already have when they can't even tell you what they have now. Fuck you with your bullshit, nonsensical, self-contradicting, third-assed diagrams--some half-UML, half-clip-art, half-pie-chart drivel. If you're the CTO of a company and you want me to think long and hard about rebuilding your distributed systems, you can think long and hard about expressing what you already have. And NO: a verbal explanation pow-pow WebEx over your DSL connection with your protege that mumbles worse than an Atlantan rapper doesn't count as fucking "knowledge transfer" of your fucking architecture, FOR FUCKS SAKE.

I tried implementing graph data structure in java. And I reckon it's the most painful code I ever wrote since "hello world".

python or javascript?

Happy Halloween to all

hello world

How it all started today: achieved rank below 100 for the first time in a coding competition.

How it's all ending: not able to solve even a single problem now. Not even the Leetcode easy ones.

Conclusion: a happy beginning can end depressing.

Cheers to Programmers...

f**K Gmeet, f**k it

Okay, lemme be honest today...
So, I don't know HOW TO CODE IN BINARY.
Looking for some tutorial on Binary coding.
Pleaaasssseeeee...

when the code works: that's f**king easy
when the code doesn't work: what the f**k is going on, you dirty piece of sh*t, you f**king computer, sh**y compiler.

oh, dear! I missed a semicolon

Programmer at an interview:
interviewer: introduce yourself
programmer: Hi, my name is ______, and am a programmer,
you can actually call me a programmer because from the top I look good, but from the bottom I am naked.

comment below whether you will be hiring this programmer on not.

MySQL or SQL Server?

My first year of programming be like this:
compile error
runtime error
semantic error
STACK OVERFLOW

Quicksort has never been such bullsh*t before

Though JS is a terrible language( as it's absolutely insane ), why do developers love it and why is it taking over the programming world?

JS is just like the C for web, but a bit weird.

Is the n-ary tree a graph data structure?

Is it me or it's just the fact that web development never goes down my throat

Just hovering through some CSS. that's when I encountered this CSS stuff:

box-shadow: 0 0 20px gold;

Somebody, please lemme know what those first two 0's signify?

The biggest nightmare for a programmer :
PLEASE REVIEW MY CODE

I had been assigned a task to create a cross-platform desktop application that keeps track of the expiry of a certain product and notify in real-time.

So, my journey to create such an application starts today and the list below describes the first few hours.

1. Google/Date and time in javascript
2. Google/Javascript date object
3. W3school/Time in javascript
4. W3school/Javascript date getTime() method
5. Google/Are electron.js applications platform independent
6. Google/Dart for desktop applications
7. Google/Is dart cross-platform
8. Google/Best desktop application framework
9. Google/Python for desktop app development
10. Freecodecamp/How to build your first desktop application in python
11. Google/Pyqt
12. Google/Which is the best technology to build cross-platform desktop application
13. Google/Cross-platform desktop app development for windows mac and linux
14. Udemy / cross platform desktop app development for windows mac and linux
15. Youtube/ electron desktop app, demo
16. Youtube/ electron.js is obsolete
17. Youtube/Neutralinojs
18. Youtube/ neutralinojs tutorial
19. Google/Neutralinojs or electronjs
20. Google/Math.js
21. Google/Math.js/JS Bin
22. Google/Cannot find package “math.js”
23. StackOverFlow/How do I resolve “cannot find module” error using Node.js
24. Google/ is it better to install npm packages locally
25. Quora/ why should you stop installing NPM packages globally
26. Google/ what is nvm
27. Google/nvm version check
28. Stackoverflow/node version management on windows
29. Github/coreybutler/nvm-windows: a nvm for windows. Ironically written in Go
30. Google/how to uninstall a npm package
31. Npm docs/uninstalling packages and dependencies
32. Google/require in javascript
33. Youtube/how to install electronjs
34. Youtube/electronjs in 100s(fireship.io)
35. Roryok.com/electronjs memory usage compared to other cross-platform frameworks
36. Google/is electronjs memory hungry
37. Youtube/sql in one hour
38. Youtube/learn sql in 60 mins
39. Geeksforgeeks/connect mysql with node app
40. Stackoverflow/How to return to previous directory using cmd
41. Stackoverflow/how to require using const
42. Geeksforgeeks/difference between require and es6 import and export

TO BE CONTINUED...

me asking python: is (0.1 + 0.2) == 0.3 ?
python: NO
me: wha.!!
python: Instead, it's 0.30000000000000004
me: what the actual F***!!

(Java - verbosity) + (python - indentation_errors) = KOTLIN

All of these mentioned below are tools used by web developers. Do pin me if I missed something or incorrectly stated it.

0. laptop
1. Javascript
2.HTML
3.CSS
4.MongoDB
5. Typescript
6. Caffeine
7. wtf!!s

f**k the ones who say, "C++ is poor in string manipulation"

Stack Overflow should implement a dark theme.

Does anyone know if StackOverFlow has a dark theme on their website?

Please don't recommend a chrome extension.

what to call his facial expressions in one word?

Which Linux distribution is suitable for programming and development purposes?

I am going to use Linux for the first time. I usually worked on windows and macOS.

Count the fingers on both hands
if it comes 10 then f**k u
else if it is < 10 you are definitely a programmer.

Inheriting an ejected react-native expo app is cancer.

Is it true that C/C++ developers are paid more as compared to java or python developer?

every programmer can relate...

There hasn't been a single day when I didn't want to stab myself in my chest.

I tried Kotlin for a week. And I literally gave up. Hey, fellow Kotlin devs, what fun do you get in writing this short f**king syntactically unmatched java code!

I don't have a rant to share today so...
just mm.....mm...

HELLO WORLD

how do callback functions work in js?

when you code a lot:
walking into Mcdonald,
waiter: sir, please give your order
me:
if big_mac < 5 $ bring("big mac")
else bring("water")

Java vs C++
which one is most secure?

I just wanted to share it with my fellow devs,

I'm peacefully retiring from COMPETITIVE CODING. After two years of rigorous effort on CP, I don't think I improved a lot, although I learned some new DS and Algos. My bad that I assumed CP holds more importance than just being a sport.

It feels to me that I kinda wasted my two years, I could've spent it on some development or ML.

Now, I've started to realize that I can't think faster as other coders do. I tried a lot, but it's all dumped now. Maybe I'm not made for CP or maybe I simply suck at it.

Any sorta advice will be highly appreciated...

So, here's a joke
Terry: hey, Sam I just got a joke for ya.
Sam: yeah
Terry(whispers to Sam): go to devrant and you find the joke over there.
Sam: okay!!
Terry: alright cya

how ya doin Sam(reader)?

I badly wanted to go to Australia

In case you remember,
there lived a legendary coder named "Harsha Suryanarayana", popularly known as "Humblefool"
from India. He died in a car accident back in 2014.

The only thing that still keeps me wondering is why he always chose to code in Java( in coding competitions ) even though he knew C++ along with STL and was also aware of the advantages of using C++ over Java in competitive coding.

hello, mmmm.......ah....mmmm, world :)
cya

I f**king hate you JS, I hate you.
I beg our vast developer community, please replace this sh*t, or else
to Microsoft, let the devs access GitHub copilot for free. I don't want my best coding practices to fade away bcuz of this sh*t.

please provide me with some sources to learn about system design?

dude, C++ has evolved a lot, why don't companies move to C++ from java!
It's a universal truth that java's design sucks.

any Ozzy here??

when you're at the end of December 2021, and less than an hour left for a new year to come.

"Aw!! I thought it's still January 2021"

Interviewers during the coding round:

hey devos, I got a question to ask ya'll. I have an interview tomorrow with an MNC.

I was hovering through some leetcode problems when I came across a hard question that is forcing me to use a hashmap with the key of the user-defined type. I made up my mind to make use of C++ for the coding interview. Now, the problem is C++ asks me to implement a hash function.

If in case, I'm asked a similar question like this in the interview, which of these two options will you suggest:
a) implement your own hash function
b) use pointers as key

String good =
"I'll never give up type systems!!"
+ " Do you hear me?!"
+ " Never!";

bad =
"Can't believe it made it all the way into prod."
% NaN + 3 / '11'

upvote your favorite data structure:
scroll down to comments and upvote the one you love to play with, the most.

Did it ever happen with you that you came across a coding question( DSAlgo ) around 3-4 years ago, but you still failed to solve it to this day?

I lost my knowledge on how to convert infix to postfix.
Anyone, please help me out.

Is there a chatting application, that's network safe...I thought of meeting some random human on Omegle or Chatroulette but found out that's they aren't safe and my IP address can be easily accessible.

++ vs --
c'mon devs,
select either ++ or --

anybody, please let me know if kotlin supports JDK-16?