What it's like to be a network engineer...translated into normal people speak

User: I think we are having a major road issue.

Me: What? No, I just checked, the roads are fine. I was actually just on the roads.

User: No, I’m pretty sure the roads are down because I’m not getting pizzas.

Me: Everything else on the roads is fine. What do you mean you aren’t getting pizzas?

User: I used to get pizzas when I ordered them, now I’m not getting them. It has to be a road issue.

Me: As I said, the roads are fine. Where are you getting pizzas from?

User: I’m not really sure. Can you check all places that deliver pizzas?

Me: No I don’t even know all the places that deliver pizza. You need to narrow it down.

User: I think it is Subway.

Me: Okay, I’ll check…No, I just looked and Subway doesn't deliver pizzas.

User: I’m pretty sure it is Subway. Can you just allow all food from Subway and we can see if pizza shows up?

Me: Sigh, fine I’ve allowed all food from Subway, but I don’t think that is the issue.

User: Yeah I’m still not getting pizza. Can you check the roads?

Me: It’s not the roads, the roads are fine. I’m pretty sure Subway isn’t the place.

User: Okay, I found it. It’s Papa Johns.

Me: Okay, I looked and Papa Johns does deliver pizza. Is it the local Papa Johns or one in a different town?

User: I don’t know. Can you allow pizza from all Papa Johns to me?

Me: No I can’t do that. Can you get me an address for Papa Johns?

User: No, I only know it as Papa Johns. Can you get me all the addresses of all Papa Johns and I’ll tell you if one of them is correct?

Me: No, I don’t have time for that. Okay, I looked at the local one and it looks like they have sent you pizza in the past and they are currently allowed to send you pizzas. Try ordering a pizza while I watch.

User: Yeah still no pizza. I’m guessing they are getting blocked at the freeway. Can you check the freeway to make sure they can get through?

Me: No, this is a local delivery. They aren't even using the freeway.

User: Okay, well then it has to be a road issue.

Me: No, the roads are fine. Okay, I just drove from the Papa Johns to the address they have on file for you and there is nothing there.

User: Hmm, wait we did move recently.

Me: Did you give your new address to Papa Johns?

User: No, I just thought they would be able to look me up by name.

Me: No they need your new address. What’s your new address?

User: I’m not really sure. Can you look it up?

Me: Sigh, give me a second…Okay, I found your address and gave it to Papa Johns. Try ordering a pizza now.

User: HEY! PIZZA JUST SHOWED UP!

Me: Okay, good.

User: (To everyone else they know) I apologize for the delay in the pizza but there was a major road issue that was preventing the pizza from getting to me. The network engineer has fixed the roads and we are able to get pizza again.

Me: But it wasn’t the roads…whatever.

User: Oh, can you also check on an issue where Chinese food isn’t getting to me? I think it may be a road issue

How I've decided to answer the "can you hack" question from here on in...

"Can you show me how to hack this account please?"

"Sure, you'll need a hammer, a blow torch, chloroform, some pliers and couple of bottles of really pure vodka!"

"What the hell?!"

"Oh, it's so much quicker to just extract a password from a person, than it is to break into a system, I'm not exactly trained in inflicting pain on the human body, but I'm sure you'll be able to figure it out through trial and error, good luck!"

*code doesn't work*

-Run three times, just to be sure
-Its NOT the code, must be the project. Full rebuild.
-Run a few more times after rebuild didn't fix it.
-Google the issue.
-Stackoverflow must be wrong. The code is JUST like their solution.
-Run a few more times, but with your lucky underpants
-Reboot. Must be an operating system thing.
-Tea break. Give the issue time and it will fix itself.
-Run a few more times. Still unfixed
-Contact customer support.
-Walmart said they can't help.
-Consider writing your own language without this OBVIOUS flaw
-Kickstarter for c++++
-Raise $50,000
-Start a family
-Contact customer support again
-Run a few more times
-Now banned from Walmart
-Oh shit, missing a semicolon

Lost my iPhone last night😭 - looked all over but no luck - last chance the gas station - called and the owner said he found a phone with devRant sticker on the back. I still was not sure as lots of devRant members in NY but yes it turned out to be mine. Nice!
And the best news is the gas station owner told his dev son about devRant! So my temporary loss may change his sons life. Sometimes things are just meant to be. 😀

!rant

Boss: I need to talk to you.
Me: Something wrong?
Boss: No, just need to talk.
(Not sure what to think)

Meet with boss, first thing he does is shake my hand and proceeds to tell me thank you for all the work you or in on the last project. On tomorrow in addition to your paycheck $1K after taxes will be deposited into your account.

#feeling very appreciated

Thursday
PM: Hey why is A delayed? It should be top priority.
me: I just completed B, and C which were also top priority but got scheduled earlier, so I thought they..
PM: Agh, yes. But can you then finish A by the end of week? it would be very important!
me: No, I unfortunately don't think I'd have enough time by the end of wee..
PM: Why? This should be *the* top priority task. You should not start other tickets before A is done.
me: Exactly. But I *just* started. And. I. don't. have. enough. free. hours. left. this. week.
PM: But why?!
me: So just on Friday I have these 5 meetings here..
*shows calendar*
PM: Ok... OK! Then don't attend those before you are done. This should be more important.
me: Ugh, oh-key...are you sure?
PM: Yea, just let who invited you know that you can't attend and feel free to cc me in, I'll explain A is most important atm.
me: Ok, thanks, but that won't be necessary.
PM: What? Why?
me: You invited me to the Friday meetings.

Obviously I had to attend all 5 meetings today and A is pushed back to next week. :)

Hit Save shortcut keys another 4 times just to be sure..

Manager: *taps dev on shoulder* We need to do B

Dev: I know, you created a ticket for it yesterday

Manager: Yeah but it hasn’t been done yet. It needs to get done.

Dev: I’m currently working on A which is higher priority

Manager: Ok but B needs to be done too

Dev: I know, it’s next on my board

Manager: I’m just making sure you are aware of it

Dev: I am aware of it, it’s next on the board

Manager: Ok but make sure you do it after A

Dev: Yup it’s next up

Manager: Ok, don’t let anyone distract you

Dev: …

*goes to the local town hall to get my new ID*

A week ago:
Clerk: Sorry sir, our systems don't work anymore, we can't process your request!
Me: Epic. Is there any sysadmin in here that can fix this pronto?
C: No it's a centrally managed system. It's managed by the people in ${another town}.
M (thinking): Well how about you fucking call them then, fucking user. Screaming blood and fire when nothing is wrong server-side but doing nothing when there is. Fucking amazing, useless piece of shit.

One week later, i.e. today:
M: Hey, I'd like to renew my ID card. I've got this announcement document here and my current ID card.
C: Oh no I don't need the announcement document. I need your PIN and PUK code letter.
M (thinking): What the fuck do you need that for.. isn't that shit supposed to be my private information..?
*gives PIN and PUK part of the letter*
C: Alright, to register your new ID card, please enter your PUK and then your PIN in this card reader here twice.
M: Sure, but I'd like to change both afterwards. After all they're written on this piece of paper and I'm not sure that just destroying that will be enough.
C: Sure sure you can change them. Please authenticate with the codes written on the paper.
*Authenticates*
C: So you'd like to change your codes, right?
M: Yeah but I'd like to change it at home. You know, because I can't know for sure that this PC here is secure, the card reader has a wired connection to your PC (making it vulnerable to keyloggers) and so on.
C: Impossible. You can't change your PIN at home. (What about the PUK?!)
M: But I've done that several times with my Digipass for my previous passport.. it is possible and I've done it myself.
C: Tut tut, impossible. I know it's impossible and therefore it is.
M (thinking): Thanks for confirming that I really shouldn't enter my personal PIN on your fucking PC, incompetent bitch.
M: Alright, I'll just keep this PIN, try at home and if it's really impossible because the system changed to remove this functionality (which I highly doubt, that'd be really retarded), I'll come back later.
(Just to get rid of this old stupid woman's ignorance essentially.)
C: Sure sure...
Me: I'd also like to register as an organ donor. Where can I do that?
C: That'd be over there. *points to the other room in the town hall*

FUCKING THANK YOU LORDS OF THE WICKED RAVEN AND THE LIBERATED TUX, TO GET ME AWAY FROM THAT STUPID FUCKING BITCH!!!

.. anyway. I've got my new ID and I'm an official organ donor now 🙂

Me: Can you go to that page and see if the issue is fixed?

Colleague: if I go there it breaks things

Me: yes, it should be fixed now, can you please check it to make sure?

Colleague: but if I go there it will break things

Me: Can you just go to the page

Colleague: it broke something

Me: what did it break?

Colleague: I don't know

Me: ...then how do you know it's broken

Colleague: because the gallery doesn't work

Me: WELL THEN THATS WHAT'S FUCKING BROKEN THEN ISN'T IT

$sis: hey $me, can you help me?
$me: Uhm, sure, what's wrong?
$sis. The printer doesn't work..
$me: what does it say?
$sis: what do you mean?
$me: like, when you try to print something, what does it say?
$sis: uhm... idk...where should it say something
$me: On your screen you should be getting an error message right?
$sis (now getting irritated for some reason): no it doesn't..
$me: okay, let me check it out
*I walk to the printer with my sister's laptop and plug in the usb*
*Select printer > click print*
"Printer offline"
$me: was it also saying this before
$sis: uhm...yes
$me: ok
At this point im already getting a bit fed up
$me: are you sure this port is working
$sis: yes, I am sure
Okay, check other ports just to be sure, also don't work.
After about 15 minutes of debugging, turns out she managed to unplug the cable on the printer...
And all I got was a "o thanks"
Fml

Me: tried to HTML like a sad anime girl

(someone spots me)

Dude: yo you're good (I'm just making a bouncing ball in HTML in peace) wanna join our group?

Me: uh sure

(Finds out I just entered a coding competition group going to be sent somewhere minutes later after being added to the Telegram group)

Fuck me

That'd be Linux for sure. I love how it allows its operator to do anything they please, without any lockdown or nannying. How I own the piece of software (given copyright compliance of course), rather than being just (temporarily) licensed to use it. How I can customize it into whatever shape I want. How it allows pretty much anyone to contribute. And redistribution! Yes, the hundreds if not thousands of distributions and appliances that use it! Simply amazing.

Project Managers be like "hey bruh, I just wanted to put a meeting half way through your crunch for a deadline to make sure we can meet that dead line"

I never make the same mistake twice, I make it eight or nine times just to be sure.

String name;
String number
String dob;

I gave resignation so am on my last weeks. The top priority is suddenly an authentication service that is completely unfamiliar, proprietary, requires me to RTFM, and requires contact with a slothful vendor about details for our specific instance. Can you do it on a 10 day deadline?

“Are you sure this wouldn’t be a better fit for someone that has implemented this authentication system before? Someone with existing relationships with contacts that manage the authentication service? Maybe I should be the one transferring my understanding of the other 60k lines of code that I singlehandedly wrote? I’m starting from zero here. Maybe it would be good for the guy who isn’t leaving to do this one so that he can retain the knowledge of the authentication system for next time you need to implement it?”

They just plug their ears now because they clearly don’t trust me due to my resignation state. Just do it. Wow.

No comments allowed in JSON pisses me off so much.

Sure, I get all the arguments of "it's supposed to be a data-only format for machines", "there are alternatives which support comments", and "you can add comments and then minify the file before parsing"

But right now, when I just need to put a quick note inside a super confusing legacy package manager config about why certain dependencies to be frozen at a specific version, IT FUCKING PISSES ME OFF THAT I CAN'T JUST ADD A FUCKING COMMENT.

Sure Edge... let me just give larry and sergey a quick call, I'm sure they will be happy to help me fix your problems.

I didn't actually realize anyone could be this dumb. Sure, I'd heard stories, but I wasn't sure that I'd ever come across this level of stupidity in the wild. I was moving email across hosting accounts for someone, and I asked them to please navigate to a certain domain. Then they asked what navigate meant, so I told them to please type it into the URL bar. They said "OK." 5 seconds later, they said, "Which one do I click on?" They googled the url. So I asked them to please type it into the URL BAR. Then they asked what that was.

...like what? I just told you this yesterday. How fast does information fall out of your head? Do you forget where your toilet is when you wake up every morning? How do these people even function in society?

-_-

Just found old logs I had with an ex-client, pre-devrant:

"What if we add the newsletter checkbox to the login, so each time a user logs in, he has to uncheck it, or else he will be subscribed to our newsletter?"

Not sure if that even needs a comment, I am speechless that was an actual suggestion, ever.

Just wrote a (PHP based) proxy which can cache resources being requested and serve them to clients.

The idea is that (I'm going to write a firefox add-on for it too, yes) you can install the add-on and any resource (js/CSS, general web resources which would be downloaded off of googleapi's etc) hosted with Google would be proxied through the server running the proxy, meaning that one wouldn't have to connect to the mass surveillance networks directly anymore as for static resources.

I think checksum verify stuff would still work as the proxy is literally a proxy, the content will be identical to the 'real' resource. (Not sure about this one, enlighten me if this isn't true)

Input appreciated!

[ Coworker walks up to my desk at 4:15 PM ]

Coworker: "Hey man. We had to make a few changes to the codebase because one of our unit tests were failing. Can you take a look at a pull request for me?"
Me: "Yeah sure, how many files?"
C: "About 600"
Me: [ thinking it might just be a ton of libraries or gradle shit] "...ooookaayyyy... that's a lot but doable... how many lines?"
C: “128,000 lines"
Me: "Fuck you"

Supervisor: so you're going to write a perl script that will compile a jar that will be used to invoke a web service
Me: okay. What does the web service do?...
Supervisor: I'm not sure how it works. It'll just return a success or error code
Me: so I'm just going to invoke a black box?
Supervisor: that's a good way to think of it
Me: so how does the qa process work with this black box/how can we debug?
Supervisor: we don't have qa for it and we can't debug

What the fuck?!?!? You expect me to call a literal fucking black fucking box?!?! This isn't lambda calc you jabroni.

Had this a week ago. Was setting my alarms for the morning and noticed that (I always run one test alarm just to be sure) the alarm sound wasn't working for whatever reason.

*maybe I should turn it off and on again?*
*nah that's bullshit, it should just work like this, if not, something is seriously wrong!*

*goes to sleep while running the alarms on an old phone*

*tries to do the turning it off and on again anyways next day*

*IT WORKS*

*Le me feeling like a very stupid end user 😐*

FUCK PRINTERS

WERE ALL PRINTERS DESIGNED BY INCOMPETENT MONKEYS WHO HAVEN'T EVER TOUCHED AN ACTUAL PIECE OF PAPER IN THEIR LIVES?!

WERE THEY PAID SPECIFICALLY TO MAKE SURE THEY WOULD NEVER WORK WHEN YOU NEED THEM TO?!?

IT REALLY SHOULDN'T BE SUCH A FUCKING PAIN TO DO A GODDAMN SIMPLE THING LIKE PRINT A BLACK AND WHITE JPEG!

I'M NOT ASKING FOR MUCH, JUST A FUCKING EVEN HALFWAY FUNCTIONAL MACHINE THAT DOES AS ADVERTISED AND DOESN'T REQUIRE SACRIFICING A GOAT TO CONNECT TO

FUCK ALL PRINTERS EVERYWHERE

Why is there so much hate against QA in general??

I read tons of rants about how bad testers are... and as a dev who does a lot of QA work, IT SUCKS!

We (devs) have to accept that are work needs to be tested! Otherwise we want be successful with our products.

BUT the testers need to know the development business! They should be trained at the same level as the devs are.

BECAUSE if the mug on my desk is smarter than the tester it is not going to work!
If the tester has full access to all the technologies, environments and tools (and are capable of using it) he has the ability to HELP!

I THINK that testing should be more than just follow predefined steps and let a random tool generate a bugreport.

I am sure that some of you are lucky enough to work with highly skilled testers so please let them help

I bet this guy feels real fuckin helpful, editing not only the question, but literally every answer in the entire thread. His contributions include:

Capitalizing names.
Adding italics to links (Really, he took the time and clicked "edit" just to do that to an answer)
Adding the word "The"

The fact that people spend their time religiously doing this makes my head spin.

Also aren't these edits bad? the title should be in google speak (i.e. short and broken English) so that they can be found from a search engine. I'm sure SO has some rules about the title or something, but I feel like it would be better in google speak.

[Dark Rant]

I'm sick of this stupid tech world.

Don't get me wrong, I love tech. I just can't stand anymore the global brainwashing that we're part of.

Think about all the huge companies making profit on our data. For a better service, yeah sure, but do we really understand what the cost is?

Ok sure, you don't care about your data because you trust these companies and the advantages are all worth it. What about the fact that we are all forced to buy the next new smartphone after 2 years?

Like if removable batteries were a problem for us, users. Or like the audio jack. Because now someone decided that the pricey wireless headphones are Just What You Need™.

Do you think you own your smartphone?
No, you don't. You are paying a bunch of money for something that soon will be just a useless brick of glass and metal which you can't repair. But you'll be happy anyway.

Someone is so happy to the point that they will defend their favorite company, doesn't matter how they decided to stick it into their ass.

Open your eyes, you've been brainwashed.

Launched a CMS-site for a customer, created a 5-page "manual" (with screenshots) on how to update basic things like adding/removing employees from the site. One week later, I receive an email: "Could you please remove Paula from our site?"... Sure, it'll take me 2 minutes and you'll be billed for half an hour instead of you just RTFM!

Who is the guy who designed the AZERTY keyboards ? 😠

Seriously... Alt Gr + 5 = [

And the most horrible thing is the "(" char... WHY THE FUCK DID HE PUTS IT IN THE "5" KEY WHEN KEYBOARD IS IN LOWERCASE ? YES, IN LOWERCASE, NOT ONLY WHEN SHIFT IS HOLD.

There are more than 100 keys in a keyboard, so why here? WHY?

Half of time I check if CapsLock is off just to be sure if I can open a bracket just because someone thought it was a good idea to put it here. It annoys me.

Avoiding bad companies starts at the job interview. Remember that the job interview is not only for them to evaluate you, but also the other way around. Make sure to ask a lot of questions. What are they doing, how are they working, what help is there if you get stuck, are they doing code reviews, what will you be doing etc.

The job interview is the opportunity for you to get an inside view of the company. Don’t just accept any job because you are desperate. Luckily qualifies devs are much needed in companies.

Also, make sure to go to multiple job interviews so you can see the differences. I think it can be difficult to avoid in the beginning, but as you get more experience, you can sort of tell whether it’s a good or bad company at the job interview.

Though sometimes you are just unlucky. In that situation: leave. It is so good damn easy to get a job in this field.

This happened via mail thread today.

Boss: we need this new brilliant feature I just made up and running asap! Top priority, it has to be done well, for my reputation is on the line!

Me: *looks at the specifics* 'kay, looks easy enough, this evening max and it will be ready. I just nees some extra info about what kind of data validations (I speak no accountant) are needed, and some other details (a total of 3 questiona).

B: Sure! Remember, it needs to be perfect, as my reputation is at stake. Call me on the phone and I'll give you the details!

M: Can't you answer via mail? Thua way both me and the other devs will have clewr guidelines

B: Just call me! Why do you need it to be written down? It's faster this way!

...Fine. I'll keep asking until you're ready to give me a written answer to my questions. No way I'll take security details via phone for something you want in production this evening. No chance in Hell I'll take responsibility for "misunderstanding" what you said on the phone. Why does it always has to be like that?

I just cant fucking believe this bullshit!

THE PRODUCT YOU'RE ASKING FOR NOW ITS NOT THE PRODUCT WE AGREED ON MAKING. ALL THE ADDITIONAL FUNCTIONALITY AND CHANGES YOU WANT TAKE TIME!

I can't believe how rude can people be! We were supposed to stop working in this product MONTHS ago but you keep asking for changes, for additional things and then you yell at us just because we dont have it ready for yesterday?! You got some fucking balls man just fuck off. You have to understand the development process, every change you ask for can have consecuences that make us rewrite a bunch of code and we also need to test everything again and again to make sure it works! Gimme a break!

I just trained a neural network to recognize if a word is uppercase. I'm sure it will be useful at some point.

Hi hackers!
Just not sure about this one:
Is this true?
The closer i get to the router , the more packets i might be able to sniff.
And something else:
I might loose the traffic sent to the other APs while i'm close to one another.

Is there any way to capter all packets?
(I also have wired access to network but since the socket isolates the traffic let me know if there is any other method)

Thanks

Memo on August 4th: Staff, we're moving to the new building. IT, make sure the building is ready by September 15th.

IT: But the entire networking, surveillance, fire suppression (yes, we do that too) and power management systems have to be installed/redone.

Management: What's so hard about that? Just get it done.

Memo about a week ago: Timeline for move shifted to September 9th

IT: Sir, this request is unreasonable especially since you still want us to go through the usual procurement process of hiring vendors to deal with stuff.

Management: So you mean to tell me you can't handle that in the next couple weeks?

IT: We're a large organisation with ~300 employees. The data centre in the new building isn't even usable yet.

Management: I don't care. Make sure everything is placed and operational by the 5th. Stop making a mountain out of a mole hill!

I bumped into my PC early this morning, and it took me 12 hours to realize that 3 out of 4 RAM sticks were chilling on top of my graphics card... together with the CPU cooler.

I'm not sure whether I should be amazed that it kept running (with a few random reboots) with just a crusty chunk of thermal paste as a cooling block, or worried about how fried my hardware is now.

Don't you just love it when you're waiting on a team member in a different country to push code that you NEED to be able to finish your job, but you know they've already gone home for the night and you're stuck reading the same three doc pages for your entire day at work? Because I sure do

Hey hackers! It's me again 😀

If I wanna be an awesome pentester / bug hunter , what should be my main focus?
Network?
Data sciense?
Algorythm?
Low level programming?

I've already passed network + and basics of ccna and I already know pentesting using kali and I know c and python as well.
Just not sure where to go next and keep using kali packages makes me feel like a script kiddie (which is aweful 😬)

Dreaming to be able to write my own exploits and have my own 0day bugs👑

Thanks for any recommandation you would

TL;TR

My mum just came to me asking me why the mouse is not working ...like I'm GOD of electronics :( (I'm just a simple dev) I simply though that the battery is dead because it's old. Soooooo.....
I showed her how to open it and how to change the battery. After 5 min she came back with a new battery and the same mouse asking me to fix it for her....

In my mind I literally snapped my brain was bleeding and exploding at the same time.

I just cringed a fake smile and changed the battery in front of her very slowly. I sure she won't remember how to do it next time.

At the end of the story I can't talk back or be angry to my parents I have to much respect for them. They though me everything from how to poop, speak, dress, eat and so on.

Be kind to your parents.

DevRant is a wonderful community, and the last thing any of us would want it to lose it. I think DR should have ads. To think that DevRant grew so fast and large, yet they haven't implemented ads shows just how awesome these guys are. But, it worries me to think that it's only supported by merch and people paying for collab and avatar stuffs scares me. Just a small ad at the bottom of the screen, I'm sure most of us wouldn't mind, and if it helps these humble and amazing people who created DevRant, I would be more than happy.

Manager: "Hi Almond, how is X going?"

Almond: "...I don't know, Bob is in charge of that."

Manager: "Ok. Do you know the status of Y at all?"

Almond: "Not sure, isn't that Bob's responsibility too?"

Manager: "Well, yeah, but I never seem to be able to get a good answer out of him. Find out on both fronts and let me know ASAP please"

...sure, I know how this goes. I'll stop all the dev work I'm doing, do your job for you, talk to the lazy bonehead that never bothers doing anything, report back that he's done sod all (or still "in a requirements gathering phase" as he puts it), be asked "why is he taking so long", have a bit more back and forth, then decide we'll just leave him be as actually trying to get him to do any work is going to be too much like hassle 😒

Me: Are you sure you want this in the acceptance test procedure?
Lead: Yes.
Me: I'm just saying, we don't have any requirements for this feature so it doesn't really belong there.
Lead: Just put it in.
Me: Are you sure? It's a lot of work for something that isn't even required to be there.
Lead: Go do it.
Me: Okay.
*I do the work and it goes to peer review*
High ranking person from another team: I don't see any requirements traceability. Why is this in here if there are no requirements?
Me: WELL AIN'T THAT A GOOD GODDAMN QUESTION!?

Ya know I don't mind Windows updates, I get it the OS needs its updates, so last night a pop up asked to when to do the update I thought hmm maybe Sunday (probably be driving my motorbike so I'll be out of the house), set the time and done.

Afterwards I go to shut my computer down and accidentally hit update and restart out of shear annoyance. So I wait it out, I thought well okay now it's done I won't have to wait. I go to shut down and it says "update and shut down", ... Right after I just updated...

I thought okay at least I'll be going to be knowing tomorrow I can just turn my computer on and play some games to chill for the night.

Oh but no, nope not gonna happen, I have to wait for it to "actually" update. Been waiting for about 30ish minutes :/

I think I'll make sure that updates don't happen anymore, I'm pretty annoyed at this waiting :/

Honestly wouldn't have had Windows 10 in the first place but somehow my computer decided to just install Windows 10 after I kept saying nope to it's damn pop-up, I just turned it on and boom "we're fucking​your day up by installing Windows 10"

I actually take off anything that makes Windows 10 look like it and make it look more like win7.

70% done :/

The second time I dropped out of college. I wasn't sure why at the time, but I just couldn't manage to keep myself motivated and interested. Later on I was diagnosed with ADD and all my school problems made sense, but at the time, I thought that since I'd tried and failed twice to get a computer science degree, I wasn't qualified to be a developer.

And now I have a degree and a dev job and I know what's actually wrong with my brain and how to deal with it.

If you are completely new to coding, no problem at all! All of the concepts are fully explained throughout the exploration. Just keep in mind that it might be tough and frustrating and times. But don't give up! Coding isn't always easy, but it sure is fun when you get it right.

Worst interview experience just happened today. Had a face to face interview with three people for a web development position. Felt like they were making fun of me. I couldn't remember the proper group by syntax off the top of my head and had no access to Google. They ended the interview right there saying they needed someone who could hit the ground running and that I would need months of training to get to where they needed me to be. Which seems a bit unfair. I am rusty, sure, but most of the situation would have been mitigated via Google.

It's a new semester and the introductory class for a General Ed is going on.
Prof: What do you want to be when you are done with engineering?
Me: I'd like to be in the security domain but I'm still not sure.
Prof: Then why are you doing Computer Science? You can just get a job as a security personnel.
FML.

Not sure if thats just me, but I absolutely can not stand watching people work on a computer slowly. Like: Watching people copy a text into a different window be like:

Select text with the mouse...
Move mouse down for 20 seconds until everything is selected ..
Right click
Copy
Click on Taskbar to open different program.
Right click in program
Click paste....

I .... just ... can't man.
Its: Ctrl+a, ctrl+c, alt+tab, ctrl+v

(And that is just one example, there are worse ones)

Maybe that just me, but I am so used to using my computer fast, and I optimized the shit out of my workflow.

My work is LITERALLY cock blocking me.

My wife and I scheduled a lunch 'date' at 12:30. At 12:10, I foolishly thought "Eh I'll check in my changes, I'm 95% sure everything will be fine". Wouldn't you know it, after compiling for 7 minutes, the build server throws an error complaining about package compatibility, which locally is just a warning. Now I have to babysit the good damn build.

I seriously thought about bolting and just dealing with it after lunch, but I'm a good little developer.

Alright, I'm grown up enough to admit it publicly: I DON'T LIKE GOING OUT TO PUBS OR OTHER DRINKING PLACES. Even if it's to take a company guest out for the night. Or a teambuilding. I don't care. If you're gonna meet up just to sip booze and talk about stuff, I won't be there.

It's boring
it's pointless
it means a shitty next day
it means a shitty rest of the evening [booze messing up sharpness of mind, no driving, etc]
it doesn't bring any value
it's not fun and it sure is not my cup of tea

taking the guest to play golf - sure. Take him to a range - blasts of fun! Horse riding - absolutely. Go-carts - hell yeah! Basicaly doing ANYTHING but sitting, getting dizzy, slowly losing control of my body and thoughts and sharing that experience with someone is a better way to take a guest/client out or have a teambuilding.

DO something. Not just sit and drink and slowly get stupider in front of someone.

!rant

Conversation between [C]oworker and... some kind of customer-side [P]roject manager.

P: Hey, our release 2.0 is ready, but somehow I can't add tag to master. Could you try, please?
C: Yeah, sure.... Done... We are missing tag for 1.2 still, should we add it?
P: Oh, right, I forgot about that.
C: Ok, found merge... Done.
P: *displaying repo in GitBlit* Uh, now the order is wrong. And date is the same. Can we do something about that?
Me: We can just push that tag with replaced date. *just guessing*
P&C: You can do that??
Me: Sure
Me.thinking: Thats git... I would be suprised if we could not.
Me: *pushing tag* Check it now.
P: Whoa, nice!

800 line file.

Could be 300 lines but despite having version control, the devs didn't have the balls to remove any of the code. Just commented it out or appended _old to the function names.

"It's easier to undo than version control"

Sure, but how much time are you spending wading through the waist-high swamp of shitty, useless code?

You've got to be a masochist to be a javascript/typescript developer.

Each time I come back to the npm-related parts of my project, the application won't start because of some dependencies nonsense. And I know for sure I left the project working perfectly last time.

Every time... every fucking time! Just leave the project unattended for a week and be sure you'll find it dead next time.

I mean I as a developer don't really have to do ANYTHING for my code to break.

How can people love javascript is a mystery to me.

Guy studies programming for a year.
Guy: I am going to start this amazing project wanna help
Me: Sure what is it
Guy: ***Long story of a decent idea***
Me: Sure Ill help, what do you need me to do
Guy: Only a few functions
A few days later...
Guy: Hey I don't where to start or how I should do it can you help me with like THE WHOLE PROGRAM?

If you haven't gathered from this story. Don't be that one guy who has an idea but doesn't write or make a plan for it as your just going to waste other peoples energy and resources.

Devs: Can we please get adequate hardware to do our job correctly? Please, just a new set of larger monitors.
Lower management: Sure, this is going to be easy.
Upper management: Wait what? This will cost us around 500€ times 10? Any maybe in the end other departments will want that to, so make it times 100.

We're a 4+ billion company ... but yes, please, I love scroll bars and they make my work so much faster.

#Confession :
Searches something on DuckDuckGo.
Just to be sure that I got best result, searched on Google and checked :/

Professor:
For your first assignment, create a Java application which can do the tasks X, Y and Z but make sure that your output is formatted exactly the same as my two examples in the PDF I've provided. You don't know if these are tabs or spaces? Just pick one and hope for the best. Oh, and don't forget to save all the generated objects in a Collection. The fuck do I know how they should be sorted in there, just make it look the same. Anyway, you can upload your code on our server sometime next week where your program will then be tested. Good luck.

PS: All my presentations are written in Comic Sans. I heard you kids love that shit.

When I start #100daysofcoding ! In which you at least daily code for an hour. It can be your side project or learning something new. Just search on Twitter if you want to know more
I am sure many of you already know this !

Docker is funny.

I'll try to fire up docker-compose and it will freak out.

Docker Error: "Oh man! Oh man! Something is wrong! It's probably not docker it's YOUR CONTAINER!!!! WTF DUDE!!!"

Me: "Uh docker ... your little systray icon indicates docker itself is broken right now...""

Docker: "No way man, i'm sure it's your fucked up container, must be something wrong with it!!!"

Me: "I'm just gonnna restart you."

Docker: "OK but I'm just say'n th----"

-restarts docker-

-restarts docker-compose-

Docker: "OMG It's up!!!!"

So today I arrived on Ireland to hike for three weeks. Tomorrow I'm heading out together with one single other scout to walk 160 km from point A to point B, both of which are unknown until the minute we start. I'm not quite sure how much internet coverage I'll have, so perhaps there won't be so much ranting, commenting and ++'ing. Sad to leave for almost a month with just a couple of hundred ++'s left to reach the magic 5 digit score. Well, anyways. Unless I appear earlier, have a nice few weeks!

I've just realised it might be a bad idea to use my real name on devRant.

I use it everywhere online. Work "agree" to leave my social alone... but I'm still sure they spy on me.

Whoops. Hi?

"I got an issue on my pc, can you have a look?"

Sure, I'm afraid I don't know the solution to that, just google xxx and I'm sure there'll be something to fix it

"I don't know how to do that, that's way too complicated. Nevermind I'll take my old pc"

y tho...

Best email of the year so far, from a "reputable" IT supplier.

I had asked for numerous copies of x86 and x64 copies of Windows 7.

Clarification email came back "I can't find an 84 bit copy of Windows. Can you clarify?"

Not sure that mail will be beaten this year. They weren't even looking for an 86 bit version.

Unfortunately I just had to explain rather than play along for a few hours as time limited.

FML.

The more I learn about programming the more terrified I become about having huge knowledge gaps and learning something wrong by possibly making wrong assumptions about how certain things work or by falling on bad tutorials. I'm constantly hyped about coding, and at the same time I always feel I will never be able to say confidently "I know how to code".
How the hell do you make sure you are learning programming correctly as a self taught? Or do i just have to accept that no matter how and what I code there will always be a better way to do it, resulting in me constantly feeling as a low-skilled coder?

I joined (still under probation period) in a startup founded by an 18 year old.

I work after my full time job for them and thought itd be fun but the kid made a slack channel and asks for progress updates everyday and feels a bit in a haste to get the product up and running. He seems to think I will be working every weekday from the second i come back home till i sleep. I have a party today that im going to and im sure he will ask for progress updates and when I tell him im out and wont work today he’ll probably say something like “the faster we do the project the better”.

Im not sure if i should leave now while its easy or i should stay for the money ($900 a month). Like i really dont feel like tolerating a demanding kid who cant wait for his app plus id much rather be working on other things just for fun like making rust crates. but at the same time the extra money is nice.

Thoughts?

With the winter months fast approaching I am putting serious consideration into smuggling a blanket into my desk drawer after hours so that when it gets really cold due to the a/c, I can just whip out the blanket and code at work wrapped up like a burrito.

Yes, for sure, there will be looks, but I don't much care and it'll also be the day remembered as the day someone brought blankets into work.

TEAM PROJECTS IN UNIVERSITY BE LIKE:

You will need to write a paragraph of text, approximately 100 words long.

In order to manage your work more effectively, you must split the paragraph into sentences and each one of you should write one.

Make sure you don't clash with each other, the text is meaningful and it flows nicely.

You have one month: you should meet at least twice a week to discuss how to go about the tasks, review your work and plan ahead.

We will be checking on your progress on a weekly basis.

Most importantly, do not just wait until the last minute and have one person do all the work: that's just silly.

Just going to join in on the new Linux CoC with a small opinion, Linus shouldn't have stepped aside, development doesn't need to be 100% serious...

Remember when the term rockstar developer existed?
We got DOOM, quake and Wolfenstein, changing the face of gaming for the better, sure some things were of questionable standings with attitude but if all of us have to be polite and 100% by the book we will just end up with more programmers in suits and more EA like companies...

Now before the hate, this is an opinion and unfortunately the way devrant is at the moment that probably means fuck all and I'm just pissing in the wind ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I got stuck with a small task for days, today I just have the courage to ask for help and a senior literally gave me the code for the problem! I'm not sure if I should be happy for finishing the task or embarrassed for couldn't solve the problem by myself. 😄😥

When you have to write methods that can only be used in a specific way only just to make sure your coworkers aren't fucking shit up.

New client: we have all the source files for our website just need it to be responsive. We paid a lot for it back then, should be easy to for you to work on.

*Sure we'll take on the project
**Gets Flattened PSD file, HTML CSS JS Minified :/

I just started as a computer science major, and I'm a little irritated because I think I know more than my proffessor. I was excited that I would be pushed to my limits, but the other day I asked him for things I should work on to get ahead...
Him: Sure, page 475 has some good projects. Just don't go past chapter 9 unless you're confident with pointers.
Me: I did C before C++ and I hated pointers.
Him: C doesn't have pointers, you must have been using a different version of C.
Me: OK
Like really? I just can't wait till next semester.

So I just got off of a teams call which I suffered the classic BSOD part way through, a colleague tells me that the entire time I was disconnected waiting for my laptop to restart, my team's account was broadcasting a super loud jackhammer style racket to everyone else in the call 🤦🏼‍♂️ and of course nobody knew how to mute me so they sat in 3 minutes of what can only be described as noise 😂😂

I'm not sure whether to feel embarrassed to have caused the issue or to be annoyed that the software does something so random while I'm not even in the call or with a powered on laptop 🙈

I'm a contractor at a product company and today I had the pleasure of working with some jQuery.

A function needed to be called before another function, hard work right?

So I moved the call to the function 3 rows higher, checked it in, set the task as ready for test and started to look for other tasks.
Within a couple of minutes I get a direct message from another dev, let's call him Steve.
Steve wanted me to set the task to ready for code review instead of test, so I did just that and tried to move on.

Some minute or two later Steve contacts me again:
"It would be great if you'd move the comment so it'd be over the call to the function"

Well, I'm not one of those who likes comments... If you need a comment, it's probably not good/readable code. In some cases sure, it might be a complex block coming up.
Sorry, lost my train of thought.

I answered Steve : "Are you sure, I could just remove it instead?"

(for readability S will be Steve and M will be me)

S: Well, it's always good to have comments
M: In this case I think it will be alright.
S: But it's nice to see what the function is doing.
M: I'll do it if you really want me to.
S: It's better to have the comment than to not have it and needing it.
M: Okay then

The name of the function : LoadOrganizationTree()

And this is the comment :
//Load organization tree

A client just asked why her site was in Latin instead of English (I used dummy text because there was no content yet).

Last week, she requested l chop up a .jpg mockup because she 'can't scroll' the image.

I had to re-read the email to be sure.

Here is another rather big example of how C++ is WAY slower than assembler (picture)

Sure - std::copy is convenient
but asm is just way faster.
This code should be compatible with EVERY x86_64 CPU.

I even do duffs device without having the loop:
the loop happens in the rep opcode which allows for prefetching (meaning that it doesnt destroy the prefetch queue and can even allow for preprocessing).

BTW: for those who commented on my comment porn last time: I made sure to satisfy your cravings ;-)

To those who can't make sense of my command line:

C++ 1m24s
ASM 19s

To those who tell me to call clang with -o<something>:
1) clang removes the call to copy on o3 or o2
2) the result isnt better in o1 (well... one second but that might be due to so many other things, and even if... one second isn't that much)

Different perspective.

So your friend wants you to make the next big Facebook or Google because they know you can code....lots of rants like that and it gets me as well when I'm fixing printers for family and friends. Thing is these people genuinely just want to do something cool and succeed so they can have a good life. They see what we can do and wish they had the same talent. They have an idea they think will be great, they don't know what we know, and they don't know that it could be the most amazing thing ever and still never take off.

They don't realize to be Facebook or Google you have to sell out your values, morals, and soul. They just think if we can code we should be millionaires. So on that philosophy after just over a year the devRant creators should be rolling in cash right? But pretty sure I saw they are still operating at a loss.

I'd love to be able to have the time to work with each of them, teach them, and guide them through that first failure and let down of realizing that coding doesn't buy a magic ticket to a new life.

// Like anyone ever really fixes a printer //

So somebody decided that instead of simply escaping apostrophes it would be best to just delete them altogether. I m pretty sure you ll understand why that s a problem.

Hey there! I'm a sophisticated IDE!
I see your trying to Undo your work! That's great.
Oh now you're trying to redo...
I'm sorry... I just deleted that important line of code. I'm sure it will be ok though.

Yay! Finally got my first job in IT.

They call it just "IT admin/sysadmin", but it's... eh..
What I do is make sure the servers work (sysadmin part) and make desktop/mobile apps. So far, the company seems to be quite nice, there are already 4 devs who are friendly. *knocks on wood*

Will see how it goes, and I'd like to thank you for sharing your stories. Learned quite a lot from them!

Guy I work with messaging me: Hey could you check my SQL syntax to get the date part for the month and year.

Me thinking: Ughhh this is going to be something stupid I know it. Why doesn't he just check it himself?

I check it... 2 queries that are very, very, very... simple... and similar except one returns last year (2017) and the other returns the current year (2018)

Me: Not sure what your issue is... I'm not getting any syntax errors. They are executing

Him: Well it shouldn't show 2017, it should show 2018

Me thinking: learn to debug you lazy fuck

Me: Well you're adding a -1 to your year...(Not sure why your even adding to it if your just getting the current month and year)

Him: Oh you're correct! That makes sense

Waste of my time

I literally just had this conversation.

H: Me
C: Colleague

C: "Hey Hindsight, I'm having issues with our web print driver, it's not opening the browser after printing"
H: "Have you checked Interactive Mode in the installer so it opens the browser?"
C: "Yes"
H: "Are you sure you have the right domain name in your configuration file? It should be <thing.example.com>"
C: "Ah, it's just example.com. Should I just change it in the config?"
H: "No you need to regenerate the config from our server tool, because the server data needs to match your client config data"
C: "Ok, my config says <example.com>"
H: "Yes, just regenerate the config with <thing.example.com> instead for the domain"
C: "Ok I'll do that. What was the correct domain again?"
H: thinking "Holy shit can you really be that dumb!" but saying "<thing.example.com>"

"Can you review this pull request?"

Ok, sure

- Description in broken English
- HTML/CSS changes seemingly just for the fuck of it
- No user story listed OR
- User story listed has no description
- Mockup does not specify what should be changed
- Owner is offline because this entire team operates out of India
- Requirements said to exist but their location is unknown

Just don't open it...

Will definitely not pretend to be productive 24/7. But the below help me reach a satisfactory 8/5 most day's.
- Exercise in the morning
- Eat breakfast
- Listen to good music
- Make sure to have fun moments throughout the workday (++ for initiating)
- Catch air, have a walk, take a break
- Minimize interactions with toxic people
- Be open in sharing knowledge, thoughts, work , good people will repay you
- Get in the kitchen, cook nice healthy meals
- Set concrete and reachable targets
- Remain eager to learn
- Celebrate successes
- Spent time with friends and family
- Catch enough sleep

And above all, DON'T open devRant!!!

Manager redesigned large parts of a website template that I have been working on.

now, this did not bother me one bit but I am pretty sure it has to do with the delivery of the message. She was so happy about the redesign and it really did look better. I could not find it in me heart to not comply and just be happy. Plus she always lets me come in super late :V and she really is pretty and very nice to us.

oh well.

It’s so great to hear Apple is finally officially making the transition to rolling out their own silicon on everything... fucken fabulous. Sure there may be problems at first but this might just get the ball rolling to get more companies todo the same... we need to eliminate the silicon monopolies... ARM and rolling your own is the future... well it always use to be the standard... back in the day, until the whole modularity and lean manufacturing and order off the shelf shit came about .... but finally we have once again come full circle back to where things use to be.... pairing hardware with software fucken beautiful LOVE IT!!!

Sure this will affect portability but .... guess what folks... means more jobs for us... quit being lazy and complaining about having to work..

Love vertical integration!!!!

I'm lead frontend developer/ consultant on a big government project, it's 10 days to release and I couldn't make it to a dinner with girlfriends extended family.

Pretty sure I just got dumped as she doesn't want to be in the way for my work so she is packing her stuff and leaving my apartment tonight.

relationshipsFailedDueToWork++

Any one else have a problem buying gadgets they don't need? I just bought an Amazon Echo and not entirely sure what to do with it. I also have about 6 waiting to be shipped from kickstarters

I've never been hacked - not that I know of :D - and never "hacked" someone else.
(Sure, I did some things in high school to circumvent certain restrictions but nothing worth mentioning whatsoever.)

But all these rants that I read so far have me wondering if I shouldn't simply setup a honeypot sometime when I'm about to be really bored just to have some fun. Then again, I don't have time to be bored. :/

A piece of code someone just pushed:
In pseudocode
------------------------
Function foo()
Result = GetFoo()
If result != null
DoStuff()
Return result
Else
Result = null
--------------------------
Ffs.

It's written in a strongly typed language, and the whole function is in a try with an empty catch and inside yet another try with an empty catch. Guess he wanted to be sure no error got away....
Oh, and he has 9 years of experience, and since all paths don't return something it does not compile

*hmm let's try a new Linux distro... *
*creates backup, bootable disk and everything*
*installs new distro*
*reboots into old system just to be sure*
*boots into new dust to after checking the old system*

Idk I'm weird... (got triple boot Linux by the way)

Things that seem "simple" but end up taking a long ass time to actually deploy into production:

1. Using a new payment processor:

"It's just a simple API, I'll be done in 2 hours"

LOL sure it is, but testing orders and setting up a sandbox or making sure you have credentials right, and then switching from test to life and retesting, and then... fuck

2. Making changes to admin stats.

"'I just have to add this column and remove that one... maybe like a couple of hours"

YOU WISH

3. Anything Javascript

"Hah, what, that's like a button, np"

125 minutes later...

console.log('before foo');
console.log(this.foo)
etc..

Me: Why are we spending time building reports for Support? AFAIK they never read or use them.

Boss: Seems they expect you to do it.

Me: Then what exactly are they supposed to be doing? All the issues seem to just escalate back to us.... We should just make sure issues never get into PROD

Boss: I agree, they're always firefighting... we gave them more funding so eventually they should catch up **Me: I highly doubt it, you should just stop hiring monkeys** esp. if we prevent PROD issues.

Me: Yea... we should prevent production issues because someone always has to pay off the (technical) debt and interest rates in PROD are very high

* Teams meeting, doing some early testing with the client *

Dev Team: This is an early build, so please be aware that bugs can occur at this stage. (That's why we didn't want to show it but you insisted)

Client: Sure, don't worry.

* 15 minutes later, first bug happens because some state management at the front end was not tunned yet *

Client: Can you solve this bug?

Dev Team: Sure, just let us replicate it and we come back to you as soon as...

Client: Can you solve it now?

Dev Team: ... Okay, let us ser whats happening and we will come ba...

Client: You don't need to hang up, just solve it.

*Dev Team internal chat*

Me: Fuck
Other dev: Fuck
My leader at the time: Fuuuuuck

PS: This happened in two separate occasions. I hated that project.

so my job at this startup is more of a general manager over all departments, checking in making sure everything is going smooth (basically COO), but we just did a super private beta launch today as our devs went to sleep, i spent most of my night tonight bug fixing and doing some style fixes and man did it feel good to be back and doing that (especially since most of the heavy lifting has already been done 😂)

"We need to have a meeting to clarify your role"

My head: Just give me a raise and then leave me alone

My mouth: Yea, sure. When works for you

Context:
My job is a little confusing.
My title on paper is support technician and I'm on the DevOps team but I have my own project to automate health checks. So most the accurate title for me would actually be Automation Developer Attached To [department name] DevOps

IDK, man, it feels like the LB might still be caching. How 'bout throw yet another no-cache? Just to be sure.

PSA: negate your tests and make sure they fail!

I have what I thought was a weird and slightly paranoid habit. When I write tests sometimes just as a sanity check negate the assertion to make sure the test fails and isn't a false positive. Almost always fails as expected.

But not today! Turns out I had forgotten to wrap my equality check in an assertion so it would always pass. It freaks me out to imagine pushing a test that always passes not just because it doesn't do its job, but could also obscure a bug and trick me into thinking it works differently than it does. Broken tests are the worst!

But it pays to be paranoid.

Just discover that I can send "echo bomb" to one of my fellow students trough SSH with the write command.

Then I discover the wall command to send messages to every connected user. Not sure if I am brave enough or if I am going to be banned from our network if I do that 😅

Few days before vacations ...

PM : "Project must absolutly be finished before your 3 weeks vacations."

ME : "We have to clarify the technical solution with the architect and the analyst before I can write the code."

PM : "No. Just do it and make sure you transfer the knowledge, it's urgent for the business."

... 3 weeks later, back from my vacations ...

Total of 0 commit(s) to repo...

Have you ever flown a plane? No? Well I need you to get in the lab today and test out these high level requirements, you should pick up on it pretty fast....

The lab looks like NASA flight control and has everything a cockpit has, sure I can just jump right on it and do my thing.

This should be fun 😅

PM: OK team. There seems to have been some confusion over card AAA-111. So from now on we need to be specific in the cards and make sure we have AC and a description of the issue

Devs: Thanks, we appreciate that

PM: makes card
Card: Why is it slow (yes, that's the actual card title)
Card: ... nothing else, completely blank

Devs: Wtf?

PM: these are supposed to be conversation starters guys!

Devs: JUST TELL US THE PROBLEM! WE'LL ASK WHEN WE NEED TO

Devops (By Azure) is so stupid.... (I won';t even start of YAML, it will be a 10pages rant).

me : Ok I have 5 projects, each has it's own Azure conexxion for deploy.
Me : Can I do just ONE shared connexion ?
Devops : Yes. You need to click 150 buttons and it's done !
Me : Ok. /* doing actions */
Me : Ok ready !
Me : Project 1 do your release pipeline !
project 1 : Sure, just wait 5 minutes.
5 minutes later
Project 1 : All good.
Me :Ok now sharing test ! Project 2 : do your pipeline !Project 2 : Sure ! It's strated !
Me : Ok I'll go take a beer
... 1 hour later..
Me : project 2 ? PROJECT 2??!!!
Me : fine... going into logs.
Message : You must accept the shared conexion from Project 1 before pipeline can run
Me : WTF ? I literally just SHARED it to project 2,3,4,5 !!!

Why that idiot check ?!

One thing is sure, I hate devops more than I hate JavaScript.

Do people really struggle with CSS?

I thought it was just design and ideas but is it actual CSS y’all struggle with?

Not judging. Just asking to be sure

My laptop has its own life...
I arrived at the lecture, start the laptop, black screen... Alrighty, might be the update from yesterday, I will just revert to the old version. Nothing... After multiple reboots and troubleshooting, I put my laptop down and go the old way of sitting down notes.

Then I come home after university and I'm set on fixing my laptop. I start it, it works perfectly fine...

I'm not even sure what fixed it..

Okay ... Windows, I really tried to be nice, but that's it. You get off my ssd right now ...

Just got the error: "filename is too long - unable to delete file" (full name incl. path)

Seriously, WHY?
I mean, sure ... Long file paths/names are a thing and this is why there are limitations. I am totally fine with it!
But Why the hell allows windows you to create those files if it is unable to delete these files later ...
I don't get it. Maybe I am just hit my head to hard as a child and someone may enlighten me ...

PS: windows was running in a VM to give it a real serious try after years on Linux

How can I make my manager understand that performance should not be measured by how many tickets we have resolved?

If the ticket is an easy one then sure 1-2 days is enough, but for some complicated shit or dealing with models that I have never touched before, I am gonna need several days just to understand the requirement.

For some fucked up reason, our story point is in hours, instead of days. So when we say 24 hours, then it's only 3 days.

Another fucked up reason is that my colleagues doesn't seem to mind. I am the most vocal one objecting when got assigned too many tickets. They just joke around and seem to accept it.

FYI, I am just 6 months in and bouncing between 3 projects.
Am I just too lazy or slow?
In my previous company, the devs seemed to be pretty chill, and the project manager only complained when an issue has been dragging on for weeks.

!Rant
I was just listening to a podcast and they mentioned patreon. Not sure if you two, @dfox and @trogus, thought about creating a patreon page. I would definitely support you guys for the work and time you two put into devrant. Would be awesome to have some method to tip you guys some dollar for a tea ;)

i hate myself for having a better idea to write a procedure or a function after getting it done. *comments the first set of code, just to be sure.*

I have a Mac at work right now, and if/when it putters out, I would be fine with another, but not if it's the touch bar variety. In that case, I'll ask for a surface or a latitude(the options the company offers to the MacBook) and just hijack Linux onto it. I won't even ask if I can, because I'm sure the answer will be no.

I put up an alias called

coolness = ls - R /

Just to be sure that I will be able to impress anyone quickly enough in case I will be working in a public place
XD

So my friend told me that he recommended me to be a new Creative Engineer.
-Oh shit, sweet, what are the requirements?
-I don't really understand that kind of stuff man, just look it up, here' the link
*Hmmm*

-Html,
*ok*
-Css,
*mhmm*
-Javascript
*sure*
etc etc...
and,
Actionscript
...
Excuse me?

Who the FUCK use actionscript nowadays ???

As we currently see a lot of codeless software platform, in the next 10 years there is gonna be high demand for people to extend these shitty apps into something proper, just like it happened with wordpress. There is a key missunderstanding that writing code and developing an application are the same thing; they are not.
Once you can write code you sure ass aren't a developer, thats a grueling journey until then, and being able to create an application without code exaggerates the problem even further.

I don't know about others, but I would love to go back in time and start webdev in the early days of the internet, the idea of starting off in a place where no one knows for sure what we can accomplish with the new tech. Unlike now the small things have been discovered. Honestly I might just be crazy and narrowing my thoughts, but I rather be in the time that we would get excited over a 12mb thumbdrive than to be excited for a 2tera. Back when websites used to use flash unlike the standard "clean and flat" we have now.

I can only imagine how much fun it would've been literally starting out.

University is a dumb place.

Example:

I have been restricted to a predefined list of projects for my dissertation. The trouble is, the project must be a solution to an existing problem. So we're given a product to develop which then requires us to actively search for an implementation which addresses a problem.

Not only have we not proposed a solution ourselves but have also been given a list of software requirements. Wouldn't be an issue if we hadn't been pushed to write about our "requirements gathering" process.

So we have to gather requirements that are the requirements we have been given but do it in an independent way. Yeah, sure.

I am genuinely just going the motions with this fucking place now.

When it’s 3am and you are working on an exception for more than 2 hours and have optimized your whole code just to be sure and remember you are writing swift not java: some ints have low max value like UInt8.

Wondering how many people use git cmd and how many use different git clients.

I regularly use git cmd. I made a transition from clients a while back because I wanted to learn more about how it actually works and it works just fine for me, except when I have to google something I don't remember (like how to revert local commit)

Git clients will for sure do abstraction which can be both good and bad, but I'm wondering if there are any definitive pros for clients.

Fucking customer industrial machine doesn't work properly because the dumbass who designed the control algo failed to consider basic physics how this shit is even supposed to work. Just to be sure, he also included some race condition in the measurement part of the software.

Me VS Dentist:

Me: Hey Doc, it hearts on the left side of my jaw, can you take a look at it maybe?

Dentist: Awh that’s nothing. If you just keep it clean there is no problem. Let’s make a picture just to be sure.

Also Dentist: i can’t see it with my bare eyes but the picture indicates an upcoming problem on the right side. I HAVE TO REPAIR THIS!

No fucking complaints there but still.

This reminds me of IT people and car mechanics. They can tell you anything to earn cash from you.

Callum, not everything is a "useless fad" just because you don't like it. I understand that you think AWS lambda functions are "just an expensive con for morons", but for our batch processing use case they really do make a lot of sense.

Running some numbers to show they cost 10x more for a completely unrelated always-on service with a completely different request pattern is either naive, stupid, or malicious, and considering you're meant to be a principle architect, I'm really not sure what's worse 🤦‍♂️

PSA: The smaller the compute shader workgroups the more efficient they are, down to the wave size (32 on nvidia). Not exactly sure why, but looks like if you don't need group shared memory always have your workgroups be wave sized

Just this alone gave me a 30%+ performance increase. And combined with a few other changes got me from 50 µs to 10 µs, yay!

Ok, a customer came to us saying he had a product that is just randomly rebooting. It sure must be a software issue.

I got the task and worked my way through ~10k lines of assembly code (8085 processor on board) Weeks go by, i tested every single god damn funktion they had, analyzed every vector they put in, finding NOTHING...

Meanwhile the hardware department analyzed and tested some possible culprits on the product for me. I had NO idea what the problem could be...

Then hardware department said: oh, they forgot a resistor on the FUCKIN RESET PIN OF THE PROCESSOR!!!!!

fml...

Not sure if this should be a proper rant about the reasons behind this, or a simple 'so much win' situation..
CTO asked how I'm doing with task xy.. my answer: mostly should be fixed, but I'm trying to figure out this zz thing.. It is so fucked up, I can't make sense of it.. before I could really finish the sentence CTO was like: shut up, don't tell me about it, we know, just please fix it..can you fix it? Please say yes..and don't talk about this anymore.. 😂😂😂

Do you think it’s appropriate to use the phrase "dried" in commit messages to refer to removing duplicate code? (DRY = don’t repeat yourself)

I just used it and I’m not sure if it’s ok because some devs might not understand it and the the original letters from DRY went away and became "dried" so it might be even more cryptic.

On the other hand it’s so much more concise having "dried type X" compared to "refactored the code so that it doesn’t contain duplicates of type X"

So I'm working on this prototype of indie game with two friends. Since we are only 3, I can't just stick to coding only... Problem is, I'm the only one realising that and I've ended up doing all the jobs that are missing... Texturing, a bit of modeling, organizing the whole team, shaders, animating and so on... And the two others just stick to their thing and are confident in the fact that I'll be able to handle all the problems. It pisses me off.
But I need the project to have some base experience, and alone, I would probably melt down under the stress. But every time a problem show up I'm basically alone, and my level of stress skyrocket... Not sure if I have the shoulders to finish it, but I have to. In fact I'm not even to the point of ranting anymore I'm just depressed >.>... At least when I'm working on the code and not the rest, I'm really enjoying myself.

Not sure if I should do something about it ._.

I absolutely hate software to the point where I started converting from sysadmin to becoming more like a dev. That way I could just write my own implementations at will. Easier said than done, that's for sure. And it goes both ways.

I think that in order to be a good dev, you need these skills the most:
- Problem solving skills
- Creativity, you're making stuff
- Logical reasoning
- Connecting the dots
- Reading complex documentation
- Breaking down said documentation
- A strong desire to create order and patterns
- ...

If you don't have the above, you may still be able to become a dev.. but it would be harder for sure, and in some cases acceptance will be lower (seriously, learn to Google!)

One thing I don't think you need in development is mathematics. Sure there's a correlation between it and logic reasoning, but you're not solving big mathematical monsters here. At most you'd probably be dealing with arrays and loops (well.. program logic).

Also, written and spoken English! The language of the internet must be known. If it's not your first language, learn it. All the good (and crucial) documentation out there is in English after all.

One final thing would be security in my opinion, since you're releasing your application to the internet and may even run certain services, and deal with a lot of user data. Making those things secure takes some effort and knowledge on security, but it's so worth it. At the most basic level, it requires a certain mindset: "how would I break this thing I just made?"

Variable assignment as declaration is stupid. Looking at you, Python 😑

You can never be sure whether you accidentally overwrite a previous value and you have to fuck around with global because it doesn't know what's an assignment to a global var and what's a declaration. It's just not as satisfying as doing it explicitly and only leads to errors

have a couple friends now who have gotten dev jobs at microsoft. I've since turned down their offers to apply and have them vouch for me twice now - not sure if their recommendations would mean anything to begin with at such a place.

this has gotten me a lot of criticism from peers and mentors who have chided me for "throwing away a golden ticket" on my resume.

at first I declined because I sure as fuck did not believe I had the skills to last very long there - and truth is I probably still don't.

but now I see it as a case of the cliche "corporate devil" that everything I believe in in terms of software freedom is squarely against.

I mean, I don't really think I have the chops to make it far with the open source and free software communities either, but if I had to pick a dream or a goal to move towards, that would be it. I don't want money or reputation. I just want to be free to tinker with the world as I please.

maybe I'll have the courage next hacktober... but until then, I'm just gonna focus on learning and self-improvement. no one can ridicule me for being a dumbass if I'm actually putting in the effort to learn and improve, right?

would welcome any advice for aspiring open source contributors, as I'm not really sure where to begin that wouldn't make me look like a total hack (pun not intended)

Write code. Write tests. Everything passes and you go home happy. Come to work next morning, run tests again just to be sure. Everything fails.

This week was one of those weeks were it feels like it's never ending
Monday, delayed trains and the legacy project's new update went live

Tuesday, not a lot of work so I did some self study (best day of the week)

Wednesday, again train delay, and some funny little sh*t ripped the valve from my bike... I mean sure if you let the air out, haha little fun but completely removing the valve? That's just f'n low...

Thursday, the legacy project had a weird bug that I can't reproduce but has to be fixed before the end of this week...

Friday... To be continued... I hope it will be a quiet quick and easy day... 😟

Let me be honest. I've been freelancing full-time for 2 months now (started 1st Jan 2024) and this feeling of not working for a company is making me feel weird.

Like I'm missing out on something. I am making significantly more money than I used to, though, which is my only feedback from this line of work that is giving me the motivation to continue doing this.

I'm sure I'm just overthinking.

Me: *tries to save a file using inscape to my documents folder*
AVG: OMG OMG I SWEAR INSKAAPE JUST TRIED TO DELETE *literally the file I just tried to save* BE THANKFULL WE MADE SURE YOU CANT BE PRODUCTIVE WITHOUT TURNING OFF YOUR AV

Merry fucking new year.

I hope you find love in 2018. I see a lot of you wanting to find a significant other. Just know that out there are so many others that want the same. Just be ready to not only want love, but give it. Also, make sure your significant other also gives and is not like many just wanting to be loved.

And stay away from CSS. That shit's shitty shit.

Today I discovered that Haskell can be compiled to js. This is both wonderful and disturbing: having the strengths of Haskell feels right and encouraging, but having to transpile it to js feels unnaturally dirty.

Still, I'm not sure I can apply this at my job in any future, but I might have just the case in the brewing.

Working from home is a cool experience for me, but video meetings are a hassle. Not because of the nature of the meeting, but because I need to be sure that certain giant pillow is not visible for the webcam.

Also, for some reason I'm the only one with a stable connection, so there's a large overhead of asking and nobody talking, because we don't know what just happened

Them: I want to be a full stack developer!

Me: Are you sure?

Them: Yeah. absolutely I'll do whatever it takes!

Me: I'll hold you to that, I will piss you off everyday if I have to, to get you learning.

Them: OK, yeah, do it!

Some weeks later

Them: I want to be a front end developer, routing and models are confusing.

Me: I would laugh you out of an interview, keep practicing and just stick with one thing before chasing the next quick reward endeavor until the difficulty curve ramps up and you give up on that too!

Them: ... But it's hard...

Me: So practice, over and over until it sinks in, it's like playing the cello or whatever, just keep practicing!

I always try to break my code when it works without errors the first time.

Just to be sure that the code I wrote is being used.

Anyone else?

After writing ~200 lines of code and then unit testing it

THE TESTS ALL PASS!!!

then I run them again just to be sure and they all pass but mocha is saying I am getting 40ms lag on some of my tests...

Noooo!!!

This is meant to be an async message passing system; I cannot have an input lag of 40ms :(

With the upcoming black friday I wanted to ask: is there any actual good sites offering quality paid tutorials/courses (doesn't have to be just programming) just like for example laracasts? I have quickly scrolled through lynda and skillshare and they seem to be rather investing into quantity rather than quality? I am sure somebody here uses some site and can give either good or bad feedback.

Nice tag suggestion by the way lol

My oversea job journey continues on.

I am relocating from Taiwan to Germany. I got my work contract draft from the company. I don't think there are any big issues. But I still would like to consult dev friends here about the contract.

Especially for German companies, are there any tricky things that should be noted in the contract but sometimes ignored (intentionally or unintentionally)?

Any other advices about work/life in Germany are sure welcomed.

I am also happy to share my job seeking experiences, just put your questions on the comment.

Cheers.

Hmmmm. Just looked at my security log for my outlook account. A bunch of unsuccessful sync attempts... from China, from South Africa, from Colombia, from Poland, from Vietnam, and from Brazil. All of them IMAP attempts. Good to know my password isn't compromised, but I think I'm going to reset it and double it's length, just to be sure.

Next week is super-efficient-daily-standup-and-monday-status-bonanza-meeting week!

The most effecient way is NOT to attend.

If you have no questions/impediments/whatever and you feel like you have velocity > whatever. Be a no-show!

I am SURE you know what is expected from you!

Hey, younglings! Some meetings are _not_ compulsary. No need to be there if you know the drill. If you are in a good work place, everyone will get it. You’re working. This is not always understood by juniors.

But, communicate what your intentions are! Don’t be quite. Communication are difficult. More is better than nothing! Just right is very difficult to obtain and will never be mastered.

And, Windows 11 really sucks…

_FUCKING_ damn... I just struggled for well over an hour because some icons on my site were displaying different colors in my browser than when viewed otherwise. They're simple icon outlines which should be #111111, but in the browser after checking with a color picker (they were clearly off) the color was #181818.

Turns out it's got something to do with the way gimp exports the png (I think, still not 100% sure sadly). My guess atm: in the export settings the "Save color profile" option was enabled (not sure why, could be I did that at some point). After clicking "Load Defaults" the option is disabled, and after another export the colors look good.

Time wasted :( Feels good to have it fixed though. Does anyone know more about what "Save color profile" does and if that could be the cause of this?

Just got my own server, off to a bad start, it won't boot of my USB drive.

I can say for sure that without an OS, it won't be a very good NAS.

Not sure about anyone else, but as a non-supporter, I'd be fully willing to view video ads to help dev rant! Hear me out: Under More->Supporters, there should be an option to watch video ads so that non supporters can help support in their own way (without advertisements flooding the UI of the app). This was just a spontaneous idea and apologize in advance if it's stupid 😂

Isn't it curious that most development libraries, frameworks, widgets in an ecosystem see a decrease in popularity when they reach a "no longer under active development"/ maintenance stage (especially exacerbated in the front-end)?

As if we just can't settle on a convention. As if, even for limited-scope solutions, a final stage can never be reached, there must be perpetual growth. As if we must constantly trade a solution for a shinier one, that just might provide us with 2% profit based on a doubtful forecast... or not. Sounds a lot like the investment capitalism that resulted in the 2008 subprime crisis. Not sure what to make of this thought but

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Just shielded my laptop and his from this coworker's coffee. Not all heroes wear capes but sure its not very pleasant to be a walking espresso so FUCK EVERYBODY

!rant
Who here remembers dateprog.com? If you don't, it was a dating site for devs and those who like devs. I'm tempted to ressurect the damn thing, although not as a dating site but more of a social network (think GitHub + Tumblr). Anyone else think that'd be a good idea? I'm also thinking this'll be more than just my weekend sorted, haha. It'd have to have chat, code repos, GitHub login, etc... what do you guys think?
Also not planning to invade the territory of devRant I was just wondering if anyone was interested. Maybe even some kind of extension to devRant, as a social coding platform? I'm not sure aha. Welp, anyway if anybody's interested drop a comment! :)

I'm not sure if this should be a joke or random, but the SBB train info screen in St. Gallen on platform 5 just decided to interpret the data given a bit differently than intended.

It is not broken and no other screen has that problem. What could it be, I wonder. But I don't care enouht to post it as a question.

I guess random would have been more appropriate.

Recruiters on LinkedIn:

"Apologies for this direct approach, I'm sure you're not looking right now and get messages like this all the time, but I have this opportunity that I think you'd be perfect for.

It's not in a language you know or a framework you're even aware of, but I know you're right for the job. It's not anywhere near you either. Hell, it's not even on the same planet as you, but fuck it, let's give it a whirl!

If you think this right for you, or not, just call me and we can talk some more about this (even though I have no idea what THIS is!). If not, forward this on to 1000 other people or you will be eaten by a dinosaur tomorrow!

To be honest, I don't really know who you are or what your skills are. I'm just spamming you through InMail.

Laters, Nerd!"

New Marketing Person: [via slack] Hey! I left a comment on the JIRA ticket. I didn’t know how to tag you so I’m messaging you here to make sure you see it.

Me: [slack] Ok, thanks for letting me know. It works the same way it does in slack. Type “@“ followed by a name.

Me: [inner monologue] 🙄 You could have also just Googled it instead of expending energy and time on this slack exchange.

Same person leaves another JIRA comment later… and doesn’t tag me…Why do I even bother to be helpful…

I waa pretty sure fortune cookies were getting weirder... but seriously, it's gotten THIS bad? Not a fortune, nor a proverb, just a one-liner on political finance?

Just seems extra messed up that you can now be prompted to discuss national debt via fortune cookie from chinese take-out. We do owe the most to china afterall. Yet fortune cookies are invented by us(and typically one of the few things produced stateside). Just seems extra off...

For the new/aspiring developers:
1. If you are still looking to learn more, but you don't know where to go, start brainstorming. Make a list of projects you could make and sort them by difficulty. Put the ones you could do now at the top of the list, and the ones you aren't sure how to do yet, at the bottom of the list. As you go through them, if you want to do something but aren't sure how, just hop onto an irc chat and everyone will be glad to help. As you go through the projects, your logic and program design skills should improve, as well as your knowledge of programming.
2. Put comments in your code. Seriously. If you are working on a project and suddenly stop working on it for a week or more, you will go back to look at that code and be extremely confused. If you are making something open source, its even more important. If people can understand the code, they are more likely to contribute to it.
3. Try not to focus on code for too long. The longer you work, the more tired your brain gets. Eventually you get tired and make really stupid decisions in your code.
4. Don't code while tired (look at #3)
5. If you are writing code as an assignment, make sure to rename all variables to proper names before submitting it. The instructor will likely not be pleased to see variable names with the f-bomb in them.

I've done it! I've implemented a new feature. I call it, wheal. its just like the wheel you know and love, in every way, shape, and form. But now, you can take comfort in knowing the state of the art has surely progressed, every time you go to reference, "wheal". This has the added benefit that others who may already be familiar with wheels, will have no trouble at all coming to terms with wheals. Just please, do not make reference to wheels, or your software will not compile. And also be sure to annotate all instances of wheals *wheals are just like wheels!* until all devs have been on-boarded.

Not much tops the orgasm from powering thru 500+ lines of code in the zone... in vim...no debugger.. and without compiling just visually seeing in your mind the assembly be generated... and code being stepped thru.. and then compile and test and everything works as expected.. not sure anything tops that feeling ... definitely have to be in the zone.. one distraction and boom gotta compile to make sure nothing broke

Finally got my first dev job. I am looking at the code base for my company. And it’s like I know how to code in this language. But I don’t know half of the advanced shit they’re doing. I understand they have more experience than me. But I’m just not sure how to catch up to them. Or be even on the same level as them? I guess just more out of office learning?

I can read what they’re putting in the code and understand how it works. But like how they came up with it I have no clue. I guess I’ll learn over time and have to put in some extra man hours.

build up the apk like 3 times, just to be sure before the publishing ;)

(now it's out, it is Bongville)

I just implemented the cookie popup you wanted me to make. And now you give me a call that your tracking code doesn't appear in the source code?

Oh, but you don't see the cookie popup? You saw it right? So you've already set your cookie permissions, probably not to accept tracking cookies. We can check by... what's that?

If I can make the tracking code appear anyway?

...

Yeah, sure, no problem, change will be live in five minutes.

I just had the idea for a social network which would care about privacy, don't sell the data of its users and stuff. This would mean the users had to pay for it to keep the lights on, like 1 oder 2 bucks a month.

Do you think this could work? I'm not sure, I think there might already be too much competition in that field.

When everything kind of just clicked.
I was struggling with learning how to program for quite some time when I first started, but one day I'm not sure what happened but everything clicked. It all started making sense and I felt like I could do anything with code. It was on that day that I knew I was going to be a dev for life.

So I was thinking about SSL and trying to understand it (random thought that just came up while eating lunch). I came up with this analogy, not sure if maybe I've heard it before... Is this understanding correctly?

A and B want to send letters but make sure no one other than them can get in on the conversation or impersonate them.

Each is able to create a pen and glasses that must be used to see the ink.

So when they first connect, they exchange the pens.

So even if a middle man can duplicate the pen he can't actually read what anyone is saying. And if he tried to write something, the receiver will know it's not sent by the other since it makes no sense. So they then write a new letter and agree to send each other new pens and use new glasses?

Almost got caught taking taking a nap haha

Lately I've been taking it easy since the work I've been doing has been super easy and boring.

So I was just lying in bed watching some youtube video.

When it ended I decided it might be a good time to check my laptop and see if there was a message.

Sure enough, I WAS FIVE MINUTES LATE TO A MEETING!

When I joined, there was only one person. It was a bit hard to tell if he just didn't quit the meeting since I was expecting another person on the call haha.

Then I checked the invite list. Oh, he declined.

Oh shit. My manager was supposed to be on the call too.

Upon further inspection. He said he was 15 minutes late.

So he didn't catch me slacking off haha.

Otherwise I'd for sure miss the "you coming?" message since I turned off slack notifications on my phone and he'd think I take off an hour on fridays regularly.

Not easy to slack off, haha

Am I the only one who seems to have trust issues when saving code in my text editor? Whenever I want to save I press Ctrl+X+S like 5 times just to be sure.

NB: Ctrl+X+S is equivalent to Ctrl+S in Emacs/Spacemacs

Today I was forced to write spaghetti code.

When your database structure isn't set up properly, that happens...

I'm already sure I will need to revisit this piece of literal shit when we revise that structure. Though, it'll be much easier and logical, and I'll probably be able to just delete a big part of the code and implement it as intended.

Sure just interrupt me constantly all day, I don't have anything important to do.

"Can you provide an estimate when X will be done?"

"Can you estimate how many questions my colleagues will have?"

Not even just interns. My god.

"Just start ahead"

I am supposed to transform calls from one api to another one. Yet there's no documentation, ambiguous code statements, no examples of what values are contained -- but sure, let me just start assuming how the whole thing is supposed to work. That won't lead us more into a murky waters at all.

Even more frustrating: We own the api. We should be able to tell by the access logs how we are queried. Yet for some reason, access logs cannot be accessed and I shall "just work from the swagger defintion".

Well, that swagger definition is broken, its example are shit (somebody liked to use undefined in optional fields, making me wonder even more what the heck is going on here), and I have no idea of what I am doing. Fun times.

Just thought the other day of something: AI devs are developing what will make their job useless, as AIs will be able to do programming. AIs will probably take over each and every job and we won’t have to work anymore.

They’ll eradicate diseases and we’ll live for quite a long time. When the basics needs will be completely fulfilled, their goal will be to make of the world a human paradise, with the goal in mind of making us happy and have no worries.

Then they’ll make it to the next level and plug us to a virtual world. It’ll be a paradise, an utopia and it will probably be like the 1st Matrix...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Or it may just not happen, but can we be sure of that… I’ve always laughed at people saying technology will end humanity, but now I realize that killing all of us is not the only way to end the humanity …

Feature request: I would like to see older devs represented in the avatar choices. Not sure yet how that could be portrayed. I’ll leave that up to designers. Maybe just a little grey on the sides of the heads for hair color?

I'm so confused by our architecture and development process in general

We planned what features are to be implemented (e.g. what endpoints should do what), but there are parts of tasks which depend on others, and I'm not sure what classes to build or when to start a task given that related ones are being done by other developers, I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing

I could maybe do all of this alone my way if it was just me, but when I ask in planning about how we should go about implementing shit together, I just get backlash from this senior developer telling me we shouldn't waste time discussing implementation details in planning

Like, what the fuck do you want me to fucking do, just implement all the dependencies of what I'm doing from zero, without reusing any of the code other devs are doing that touches on the same parts?

Fucking hell, man, this is the third sprint where I'm confused like this

Maybe I'm just too dumb to be a developer after all lol

So the age of enshittification continues.

Apple is working on IPhone Air, which is rumored to be 5-6mm thick. I am sure Samsung will follow suit.

Why the fuck can't I have a simple bloody phone which just works for calls, texts and I can hold it without it feeling like cutlery.
I do not want to play games on a 6" device and give myself carpal tunnel.

I have switched to S22 Flip phone (dumbphone), it works flawlessly, lasts for days on a single charge.

Is it just me, or do REST API's literally rule the world right now?

Feeling like I can automate the universe.

But this is a real question. Are there reasons to avoid using web API's rather than sending data through some kind of shared database? I guess I'm not even sure what the alternatives would be right now... Are there disadvantages I should know about?