!rant

*Just got a package delivered, didn't check yet*
Friend: who sends you stuff from from the USA?
I (excited as fuck): uh it must be my
DevRant
Duck
Delivery.
Friend: your what?
I explain, he walks away not giving a fuck.

But I don't care what he thinks, i love my new devDucks. Oh and special thanks to @dfox for the autograph. Well technically you just signed the customs declaration, but an autograph none the less.

I love brackets on the same line as function declaration and I am proud of it.
func() {
return war;
}

Oh wow Elixir, you are so fancy and beautiful. Where have you been hiding! Can i take you out some time? Maybe a small project? 🤓

My colleagues excel at envisaging shit extracurricular activities. It may not be so godawful irritating if they weren't hypocritical scum, all of them but ESPECIALLY, the girls. When you're sick, nobody checks on you. When you text them, they don't reply. They only initiate conversations to get something. They are never friendly except they need a favor and have run out of options. You can't borrow more than one 1k naira from any during an emergency. Then they force you against your will to oblige them

Last year, they came up with this crappy cook fest assigning dishes each staff is to cook and present like some science expo project. I declined but participation was enforced. Things went sour with the caterer I recruited. Work that day was a living hell for me, I eventually had to leave

Next, they devised an end of year dinner, instead of converting all that money to a much needed 13th month salary or even bonuses. Thankfully, attendance was not compulsory so I and one other girl could exempt. Why would I buy/borrow dress code costumes at such short notice, to assemble with a bunch of people who think I'm crap?

This year again, they roped me into this dumb "love feast" program for valentine. I was livid and incensed. I stormed the inbox of one of the male instigators and gave him a piece of my mind. This scoundrel literally shakes my hand irl like it's covered in poop. Nowadays, he waltzes into my office without the courtesy to greet me. I'm so inconsequential and insignificant. He ordered me to delete the messages, implying he might leak them like the ex hr once did. Of course, I refused

The girl they paired me to buy gifts for doesn't reply my chats. I literally sent some that morning but she had the audacity to walk up to me and tell me what she wants me to buy her. It's our bosses fancy mug and my next seat buddy immediately tells me how crazy expensive it is

They've all got read notifications turned off. It's not even creepy messages or require deep thinking or lengthy replies. It's just not being regarded worthy to be communicated with. These are the people I'm going to spend a dime on. They don't even TRY to pretend I'm a human being. Literally don't talk to me but everyone else plays with each other. Personally, I'm not a gift person. I NEVER buy myself anything unless it's an absolute necessity. So why would I rack my brain, go out of my way to get you some shit you aren't even going to appreciate? It's a waste of money and intentions. They claim it helps with team bonding. I'm sore and bitter cuz that is a lie. Those interested in each other go home together, outings, sleep together, reply each other's messages. They don't need some formal carnival to do any of that

Messages are the most basic things. It's utterly insulting cause everyone always has their devices holstered. They respond to the boss instantly when tagged on the group. Any act of not communicating directly, is both deliberate and a passive declaration of war. So why drag me into your annoying shows? Do your clique thing however you want. Leave me the hell out of it