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*client calls in*
Me: good morning, how can I help you?
Client: my ip is blocked, could you unblock it for me?
Me: certainly! What's your ip address? Then I'll have a look.
Client: I'm not giving you my ip?! That's too privacy sensitive.
Me: 😶
Me: 😶
Me: 😶
Me: sir, I'm very keen on my privacy myself but without that information I can't do much for you 😬
Client: ah so you're refusing to help me?
Me: not like that, it's just very hard to lift an ip block for me when I don't know the ip address.
Client: you just don't want to help, fine.
*click*
😶32 -
Everyday i used to spend an hour in the morning reading emails.
Until i made a script that reads all mails, parses to urgent/priorities/meetings etc. Then shows me a dashboard of everything. 1 hr turned to 20mins max.
Then i made a chatbot out of it and now i just talk to it everytime and gives me the rundown.
Gave me so much time to code instead of reading fucking emails.74 -
Me: GET /sleep
Baby: 307 Temporary Redirect
Baby: 204 No Content
Me: 200 OK
Me: GET /sleep
Baby: 307 Temporary Redirect
Baby: 413 Payload Too Large
Me: 102 Processing
Me: 200 OK
Me: GET /sleep
Baby: 307 Temporary Redirect
Baby: 444 Connection Closed Without Response
Me: 200 OK
Me: GET /sleep
Baby: 307 Temporary Redirect
Baby: 444 Connection Closed Without Response
Me: 429 Too Many Requests
Me: GET /sleep
Baby: 307 Temporary Redirect
Me: 101 Switching Protocols
Me: 408 Request Timeout
GF: 102 Processing
Me: GET /sleep
Sleep: 404 Not Found
Me: 406 Not Acceptable
(Morning)
Me: 501 Not Implemented19 -
*This morning*
HR Lady: we saw your profile and we think it fits what we're looking for, I just need to know what you use for front-end programming
Me: I use ReactJs, AngularJs and for backend NodeJs
HR Lady: Hmm, so you don't use Javascript
Me: ... (unhandled exception in my head)
Me: M'am everything I mentioned is using Javascript
HR Lady: oh! ok.9 -
Manager (walking in in the morning): ey linuxxx, looking good today!
Me: w-what? I'm not wearing much special, what's so great about my outfit? But than....
Boss: April fools motherfucker!
Well, I had it coming .______.8 -
Me: good morning, what can I help you with?
Client: I THINK REMOVED SOMETHING AND NOW ALL MY EMAIL IS GONE. HELP.
M: okay sir, do you have the domain for m....
C: HEY WAIT IT'S BACK NEVER MIND THANKS BYE
M: Oh tha....
*click*
😆5 -
Just created my first program using powershell, It runs in the morning and gives me a weather forecast.
18 -
boss: What the fuck guys! Why didn't you go to the meeting this morning? Have you checked your google calendar?
me: But, but it is scheduled to tomorrow, google calendar says that.
boss: Who put that date?
me: You
boss:....
boss:And fo you double checked it?
me: What do you mean?
boss: Double check! Check if what is in the google calendar is correct!
me: But that doesn't make any sense.
boss: No excuses!! Next time you must double check!10 -
passionately making love on Friday morning.
Cellphone buzzes for WhatsApp notification, ignored.
Call ignored, SMS ignored, again call, ignored.
She : whose that bitch calling you?
Me : it's no one important.
She : Checks WhatsApp, message from CTO, server crashed.
Me : Umm, darling, I need to fix this.
It's been 2 days she hasn't answered my call after she left.15 -
Years ago I was an application developer at a medium sized corporation and was also responsible for support for an HR department. This occurred early one morning shortly after I arrived at work.
User: My app doesn't work.
Me: What's wrong with it?
User: I just get a blank screen.
Me: A blank screen? What happens when you hit a key?
User: Nothing.
Me: Do any apps work?
User: No, I just get a blank screen.
Me: Is your monitor on?
User: Yes, I turned it on.
This type of witty banter went on for several minutes when the answer suddenly hit me.
Me: Is your computer turned on?
User: Do I need to turn it on?
Me: Did you turn it off before you went home last night?
User: Yes.
Me: And do you normally turn it on in the morning when you come in?
User: Yes.
Me: Then why didn't you turn it on this morning when you came in?
User: I didn't know I needed to.
It was at this point I heard the programmer over the cubicle wall from me burst out laughing. He had been listening to the conversation and couldn't take it anymore.
The really sad part is that this was not an isolated incident. This kind of stuff occurred on a semi-regular basis with this individual's department.10 -
Conversation in (not so far) future:
Me: Sorry boss, I can't get to work this morning. My car is updating. Automatically.
Boss: Oh you have that Windows 10 car, you can work from home today.
Me: Boss, but my computer...
Boss: Oh, okay it can wait till tomorrow.3 -
I had an interview yesterday with the CEO of a startup going into Series A for the position of Principal Developer, remote. I've only ever heard of 'tech-bros', but I was unfortunate to meet one in-person. It went something like this:
CEO-bro: Good morning.
Me: Morning.
CEO-bro: It says here on your resume you live in X. That place is a shithole, and I have to look down on you because of that, bro. LoL.
Me: ......
(40 minutes of self-promotion pass)
CEO-bro: Anyway, we don't pay high salaries but offer bonuses for high performing staff instead. I'll ask HR to send you an offer.
Me: Let me think about it.
CEO-bro: One question bro. You have siblings?
Me: One.
CEO-bro: Parents still alive?
Me: No...what?!
CEO-bro: Yeah, me too. People like us don't let anything get in the way.
I wrote them an email this morning withdrawing my application 🤦🏽♂️11 -
#!rant
Boss sent me an email at midnight, and I was working voluntary O/T, so I responded. This morning, he brought me this...
7 -
This morning Google asked me to come away from a search and into this dark portal to begin its underground recruiting process w/ me. Humbled += Intrigued.
This is a rant because they also gave me a deadline and I have other deadlines, Google!
But the REAL question is: tabs or spaces, Google?
8 -
Morning Deployment.
Me: Let's add this application to this server.
Deployer: Alright.
...
D: Done. Please verify.
Me: I'm seeing errors. Send me the logs.
D: Sure. I also updated the framework to a version that wasn't tested.
M: Yeah, that won't work. Roll it back.
D: Fine.
...
D: Done. Please verify.
M: All the applications on the box are broken. Please revert to the snapshot before the Deployment.
D: Oops, I didn't make one.
🙁😟😢😭😤1 -
Day 1:
I installed an alarm app that doesn't turn off until you solve some math problem.
Next morning:
* alarm turns on
* solve the math problem
* get back to sleep
Conclusion:
most dangerous thing in the morning is the " let me close my eyes for one second"9 -
Well, I did it.
I spent 45 minutes writing my first hacky, shell-and-python automation script to save me 15 seconds every morning.12 -
OK morning rant from yesterday.
Get into the venue, connect my surface to the dock, keyboard won't work.
Try more USB ports, try another machine, keyboard (corsair k70) is totally broken.
Ugh.
Fine.
Disassemble keyboard, someone asks me a question, turn around and knock full coffee cup over my surface book.
Fuck sake.
Now I need a new laptop.4 -
Morning after my linux administration exam my mother called 15 times to wake me up. When I finaly answered the phone she she was worried so she asked.
Mom: wtf is wrong with you, is everything okay?
Me: not sure, i think something went wrong. I'll send you the log files later. *Hangs up the phone.
Apparently I do shit like that every time she tries to call me in the morning as she writes down our "conversations" just to laugh at me later.
brain@sleep:~$ sudo rm -rf /9 -
This morning finally pointers to structs in C finally clicked on my mind!!!🤯
80% of the C code that puzzled me now makes sense!! 🤗12 -
My girlfriend this morning: "You're just over there on devRant, and I'm in here making you breakfast in my underwear.. What the hell is on devRant that's so important?"
Me: "I'll be in in just a minute, hold on......"7 -
Gooooood morning devRant! Fucking friday, fuck yeah.
Hereby a rant which @dfox asked to make to test if a possible bug is fixed.
Have a great day everybody and thanks to dfox for keeping me in the loop on this!11 -
Annoyingly typical office conversation:
Person 1: "Good morning."
Person 2: "Good morning, how are you?"
Person 1: "Good. How are you?"
Person 2: "Good."
Person 1: "Good."
NO! Not good, fuckers. I hear this all day long, come up with something real or original. Talk about the massive shit you just took, or how hard you're taking the news about Diablo Immortal. It reminds me of that scene in Office Space with the repetitive call center lady, lol.17 -
Which is why I wrote my coffee machine in Linux! This is real photo taken by me in englewood co this morning.
9 -
!rant but True story!
OMG, my coworker (rather elderly if it matters), asked if he needs to open webapp in internet exploder.. < - It was intentional, but this happened in convo over morning coffe and me and some other guy almost choked with laugher & coffee..
Fucking brilliant! IE = Internet EXPLODEr! Love it!
Man, I love my coworkers (some)!!!!6 -
Me: ooh my eyes hearts, I have to sleep now, I fix this tomorrow morning.
(go to sleep)
Inner Me: hey
Me: ...
Inner Me: pisst! wake up
Me: what?? leave me alone I'm tired
Inner Me: remember that issue you had?
Me: yes?
Inner Me: this is how you can solve it
Me: great thanks, I'll fix it later
Inner Me: no no you have to fix it now
Me: I'm tired, I'll fix it first thing in the morning
Inner Me: no no you'll forgot it
Me: no I won't, let me sleep
Inner Me: no no you'll forget and I won't tell you again
Me: look I write it down in my phone now leave me alone
Inner Me: no no you have to fix it now.
Me: *crying* for God sake...
(gets out of bed and try to turn on PC and it's not starting, realizing that the power is out)
Me: you happy now, I fix it tomorrow.
Inner Me: no no stay awake till power is back on.
Me: SHUT THE FICN ON PICK OF CRAPE. Did SHDUHDBD DBDJDB3 -
Me doing monday morning Support because all of our fucking support members were not available.
Me: Can you navigate to the Installation path of our Software.
Customer: how?
Me: with the Windows File explorer
Customer: i dont have That
me: Explaining how to navigate to the install location (thinking: fuck my life)8 -
theNox.age++
I wanted to screenshot some of the birthday wishes that were printed for me on the discord server early this morning but they're spread too much, thanks anyway! That was very cute of you all. Only people from devRant actually bothered to wish me a Happy Birthday this early (maybe I influenced it a little bit ... 😂) But it's true
Everyone remember that ThatDude's Birthday is on January 28th 😉16 -
when there is no project I work in, I am just a lazy ass. And that's what happened this morning after I waked up.
Me: *bring me phone, enter the toilet and open devrant.
~30 minutes late~
Wife: *knock knock* are you there?
Me: oh hey, yes I am
Wife: it is devrant again?
Me: 😶2 -
Every morning when I'm urge to sh*t I always hold it in when possible. This way I always bring it to office and let company pay me for it ^^.
Well, what do you think I'm doing while posting this rant? :D18 -
I rarely codes in the morning, it's just not the time. I can't focus.
My inspiration comes at night. That's the right moment for me. I sometimes wish that my office hour is at night 😂
How about you?13 -
*me at the morning
- 08:30 Ah, let me sleep juuust more 5 minutes, I even don't need alarm *turn alarm off"
*blink
- nah, I should go
- 10:45 what the...1 -
A client sent me a message this morning asking for a change to the software I'm developing.
It's Sunday, right?6 -
When I was a kid I sleep walked often ..
Once I was about 7 I sleep walked to the computer and started playing the old pinball game on XP it was 11 my mum shouted at me to go to bed so in my sleep state.. I did
Next morning I had the high score 😔 😎
My mum told me what happened in the morning - im smarter when im dreaming3 -
Had 4-5 hours of sleep last night because I had to wake up early this morning for an internal demo of the feature I worked on. It was scheduled early morning because the boss was busy.
I come to the office looking like a zombie, practically sleep walking my way to the office, and guess what... The app server is down! Yay.
I had to reschedule it to right in the middle of lunch time because hey... The boss is busy. Now everyone in the team hates me for ruining their lunch.
Now I'm sitting here, staring at my code, remembering the sweet luxury of sleep.2 -
This morning my girlfriend told me about the network at her school constantly disconnecting, to which I jokingly replied "So, it doesn't deserve candy". She came back with "But it's already asking for so many cookies"...
-
colleague: My laptop wont start, I don't know what happend. It worked this morning.
me: alright, Ill take a look at it.
I walk down to another room and proceed to open it up. Some kind of smell is rising from the poor laptop. I know that scent.
The motherboard is completely soaked into coffe, with milk.
I walk up the colleague:
me: do you prefer coffe with milk och without?
colleague: haha, it depends on what mood I am in. ( she is obviously stressed about it )
me: that poor laptop of yours, is dead. You soaked it in your coffe
colleague: haha what? No I have not. It worked last night when I used it ( notice how she changed "this morning" to "last night".
I just walk away, and I hope that the insurance does not cover this shit.4 -
Lost my cool on a colleague after she scolded me for saying “good morning,” as it was presumptuous of me to assume her morning was good…
Of course since she was already a soulless hag, it had no impact on her.11 -
Don’t even. It was more like 72 hours. Done a whole weekend sleepover in the office to get a deadline sorted, left at 6am Monday morning. Got home at 9am and get a phone call asking me why I’m not joining the meeting 🤷🏼♀️7
-
Fucking airstrike alert this morning in my federal state.
Yote me out of bed yelling "The russians are coming!"
Turns out it was planned but what the fuck, the closest siren is like 100 metres from my window.13 -
When your boss sends you 25+ screenshots and messages via SMS at 11pm of issues he's found on a Sunday night... Why can you not just email it to me in the morning9
-
Is it me or doing forty minutes standup meetings every morning is a complete waste of everyone's time? I don't need to explain what is Kubernetes and how to install it to my boss...8
-
Of course you can call me at 9 o'clock on a saturday morning to fix your f****** login problem!
My private life is just a rumor!1 -
I arrived at 8am sharp today, SHARP, I usually arrive 2-3min earlier, so I can start with my actual work at 8am sharp, but traffic was rough and my scooter wouldn't turn on, so I wasn't able to.
Suddenly my boss calls me into his office, being all like "you are late everyday, you won't start work until 5 after 8 yadayada". Wtf?? You know I have a clock on my desk and I always check the clock when I'm arriving at work? (He has security cameras everywhere, so he can actually see me check the clock every morning). This morning I arrived at 8am sharp and the only reason why I started with work late is because he thought it's necessary to remind me to be at work in time. Now he expects me to start with work 5min early everyday, fuck off!20 -
StackOverflow knows everything!
One night I asked question on SO first time. So next morning, really excited man, want to see my scores. But result was -3 rating! "F**k!" And urgently deleted my question. But SO gave me `Peer pressure` badge, badge for `Delete own post with score of -3 or lower.`... OMG!3 -
My PM once inserted test data directly into the dev database [ We do have an admin panel ].
Took screenshots of what was not working properly with the imagined data.
Posted them on the WhatsApp group.
Greets me in the fucking morning with "I WROTE TEST CASES YESTERDAY".
FTW -
Just found this in my photos, sent to me by my sister.
And hello devRant.
Oh well, have a nice morning/afternoon/evening.
1 -
My typical morning Teams exchange:
Newb: GM (requesting connection)
Me: GM (connection established)
Newb: How r u? (requesting headers)
Me: Good (headers sent)
Newb: You free? (ready for comms?)
Me: Sure (comms ready)
…
Feels like a bad internet protocol.9 -
Thank you sooooo much for giving me a list of six tutorial videos you expect me to record by tomorrow, before I leave the company. It shouldn't be too hard, you say, having never ever gone through any of the processes before. Oh, and this is in addition to the big video tutorial which you asked for this afternoon that you expect by Friday morning. Not to mention the eight separate projects I still need to write documentation for. Oh, and this all would have been much smoother if this company would have given me time to work out all this documentation earlier instead of waiting until after I turned in my two weeks to take documentation seriously.
I guess I'll be lucky if I only have to deal with these things tomorrow. But given your penchant for pulling me off my main projects to deal with bullshit tangents, I bet that ain't going to happen. And I bet you're still going to flood me with calls on Monday morning, as I start my brand new job.2 -
Don't do like my work supervisor:
Step 1:
*gives task*
Me, starts working on task early in the morning
*task requires his interfering, and is stalled without it*
Me, messages supervisor
Step 2:
*supervisor takes the whole work day to reply, saying that he didn't have time to look into it*
Step 3:
Me, does almost nothing at work the whole day; closes laptop upon seeing the message of the supervisor
Step 4:
Profit: go home early3 -
right my brain, it's 2 AM and you're on your full energy. but I will regret that at the morning.
thank you for screwing me!1 -
Tonight I left the phone's GPS on, and this morning Google Maps adviced me to "save your new home address for faster navigation". Yeah, thanks for noticing that I'm going trough a breakup and that I'm sleeping at a friend's home2
-
Things that give me chills early in the morning. A password reset email that contains my password in plain text.
Seriously! 🤦♂️
1 -
Got an 8:30 class in the morning.
Me: so close to fixing this bug. Just a bit more.
12:00 am
Me: I'll just install SQL and head to sleep.
1:00 am
Me: holy crap what time is it.
1:30 am
Me: I hate myself.1 -
Thank you Google for reminding me that if I start my commute. RIGHT NOW. I can be at work in time for 07:24.
When the fuck have I ever been at work that early? Just because it's morning and I'm awake doesn't mean I'm fucking rushing of to work.
I LIKE TO NOT STRESS IN THE MORNING AND BE COOL AS A FUCKING CUCUMBER.8 -
Manager: we should arrange regular catchups, I have several Monday morning, how about 10:30, that'd be 9:30 your time?
Me inside: dude, we both know I struggle to be up in time for the scrum at 10, do you really think I'm going to be any better at 9:30?
Me outside: How about 10:30 after scrum?
Manager: OK, that works, I have half an hour between meetings
Me: Thank fuck.4 -
Goooooooooooood morning, devRant, This is me after 8 hours of work, and barely 5 hours of sleep followed.
11 -
I've been working on a thing and running on 5 hours of sleep daily.
* This morning in class*
Friend: Look at the dark circles! You need to quit playing PUBG. You are addicted.
Me: Busted! *🤯😠😤* -
This had me laughing out loud this morning, my wife just looked at me funny as I tried to explain it to her.
2 -
The worst one was my mother calling me to say "The ambulance is here so they are taking me to ER, I might have a stroke. Call you...".
And then silence... I called my brother who was as freaked out as me. As it was like a couple of months after my father died...
And she forgot her mother fucking smartphone!!!! The next fucking morning the hospital called us!!! Worst time ever!!!!2 -
Two weeks ago, I chose my modules for my Master in Data Science. This morning, I received an e-mail to tell me it was a bug, I was not accepted.
.
So what's now
.
I guess I will kill myself6 -
I earned devie middle. Bought devie left. I came in this morning and devie right is looking at me???
This may be a Tribble situation! Worried when I open my office door Monday they may come pouring out. What will I do with thousands of devies???
5 -
Good morning, good day and good weekend.
Sometimes babysitting is worth it Hehehehe.
No projects today, resting day, me, the pool, my nephews and a arduino basic manual.
4 -
Me: okay brain! We had our morning coffee. We're ready to work. Lots of things to do today.
Brain: yay! I feel unstoppable! Can't wait for logic problems and amazing things we're going to build! What's the plan?
Me: great! Today we're going to work on the ios implementation of our app. Where should we start?
Brain: ...
Me: brain?1 -
Is it just me or does everyone start having a explosion of ideas for future projects just after closing eyes for sleep? And then next morning, it's blank again.5
-
So... People até talking about windows update crash??
Omg....
It crashed on me after updating... I was late to bed so just pressed the doom button (power off)... Because I was coming on vacation next morning...
Still thinking about what's expecting me after I return
15 -
My mom once called me telling me her internet was not working. Prankster me told her that the whole internet closed at 7 pm. She was like "okay, I'll wait until tomorrow morning then" (it was around 8pm)
I couldn't help laughing like crazy as I didn't expect her to believe me.
Of course I helped her out so that she could have her game of poker. (She won $10.000 that night) :-)2 -
I shut down my laptop at 1630. After that, I officially no longer give a shit until tomorrow morning. My phone has Slack and Outlook, but neither is allowed to even run in the background. They're there for when I need them, not for when someone a work needs me.4
-
Me: "Hey, the IP binding on this page is broken"
My boss: "u broke it!"
Bish I haven't touched this project in 24 hours and it was working this morning. You're the only person that has access to it other than me.3 -
So I had a thought this morning while brushing my teeth.....maybe I should change my devRant avatars clothes every day? That way it looks like a real person and stuffs......then it HIT me suddenly.....I'm a fucking loser.1
-
It was sunny outside but the manacles that shackled me to the workstation were cold and biting particularly sharply this morning. I typed "fuck xcode" into the search engine. I found devRant. My life would be forever changed.2
-
When your week has been so busy and exhausting you remember at 1PM Friday you have a deadline for Monday morning and force yourself to do a weeks worth of work in 4 hours and deploy it on a Friday without QA testing!
To future me - I apologise for Monday’s headaches. -
Imagine being on vacation and the first notification you see on your phone in the morning is from your colleague on Teams:
"Hey! Are you available for a call despite the vacation?"
Fml and fuck me for being too kind to even spend time answering his questions instead of ghosting him.16 -
So we have a bug.
Yesterday I spend the morning sorting through other people's code to find out what is causing this bug report it to team leader once I find it. He asks me find out who made it and hunt them down! So git blame... Turns out it was him :S felt awkward mentioning it to him so didn't. 5 minutes later team leader "oh it was me" -
Employer msged me around 11pm
She wants to talk n finalize on which assignment I will work on
And what's the best time to talk
I told her in morning if she have no issues with that
She replied ok
But haven't called
My friends told me she is offended
Wth
Seriously need your input guys
Have I done something wrong?
Is it necessary to talk right away ?7 -
Wisdom teeth removal tomorrow morning. They're stuck up in there so they're putting me to sleep and really yanking on em. Gonna be out of action for a few days. Merry Christmas everyone!
I wish they gave me Xanax for a couple days in advance, not one hour in advance.9 -
My pain medication makes me drowsy all the time but only lets me sleep at inconvenient times. For example, I got to sleep at 5:30 this morning. Work up at 6:30. But my body will be more than happy to put me to sleep in my computer chair at random intervals throughout the day.
Guess I'll get to work, then?1 -
Me: *starts*
Windows: Pease restart
Me: *restarts*
Windows: Please restart again
Me: *motherfuckenly restarts*
Some bullshit security tool: please restart
And that's my morning.3 -
Hi everyone
cozyplanes here
Long time no see
If you remember me, please leave a comment
I miss this place a lot.
I am active on twitter and Instagram with the same name
Hang along with me there if you are interested
Thanks (will have some sleep and will be back tomorrow morning)23 -
Spent yesterday and this morning working on a project my boss pulled me away to do.
Just got told it's not needed anymore
/(ò.ó)┛彡┻━┻
Thanks for wasting 1.5 days...
It was actually decided on a late night meeting but he forgot to inform me this morning...6 -
I ran out of milk, so used a five second squirt of ‘cream’ for my coffee this morning. That’s ok right, normal behaviour? All this COVID-isolation isn’t getting to me..? 😆
18 -
The kitchen at my office is pretty small, it fits a max of two people. Today morning while making a sandwich, an infrastructure dev walks in and proceeds to say... "I hope you don't mind me standing behind you, it's really not a Christian thing to do"... what?6
-
Continued from:
https://devrant.com/rants/975261/...
https://devrant.com/rants/989191/...
Heading to the interview place in 8 in the morning! Wish me luck!
Will keep updated.
Peace! (insert music here)6 -
Windows: new update!
Me: *clicks on shutdown and update*
Next morning
Windows: actually I didn't finished yesterdays update hold on lol
2 -
People distressed the fuck out of me today.
So now, 2:18 in the morning, I'm in bed, wide awake. Because anxiety is shit.
... And I have to be up early to do the work that I didn't do today.
Smh...
Why do people have to be such dicks?24 -
I've been working late nights for so long that falling asleep when it's still dark is an achievement for me. So is waking up when it's still morning.1
-
Haven't slept a single bit since last night. It's 7 in the morning now but the deadline is 10:40.
Wish me luck. Super tired right now...2 -
Oh my gosh I hate SSL so much. A cert expired this morning, and with it, 29 digital signs are now offline. Shoot me now.3
-
A weird thought popped up in my mind this morning. I thought about buying an iPhone.
Please rid me of this weird notion.18 -
"Microsoft team foundation" is my current motivation for keeping me wake up in the morning. This is just a small part in their header menu. You can do better than this!
-
Day x stand up meeting scheduled for late evening:
Manager: so, what's up?
me: fixed two bugs, analysis going on for another, having a couple of blockers, but nothing out of the ordinary.
Day x + 1 stand up scheduled for morning:
manager: what's up?
me: *repeats pretty much the same stuff, with some updates on the analysis
manager: but this is what you told me yesterday.
me: but there haven't been any working hours between our two conversations.
manager: your efficiency is questionable.
me: *thinking about my happy place with a clenched jaw2 -
This is exactly why I didn't want to give the client my mobile number.
It's a Sunday morning, and he's messaged me asking for me to do something today.
Hopefully by boss is sympathetic with the week I've had and lets me ignore it.1 -
It's 14:59 and my grandmother has just called me in for tech support I guess.
I'm sitting here in fucking slouch clothes with a cup of coffee and, for some reason, sunglasses?
What a strange morning.4 -
Out of the blue this morning... little spaced out.
Open terminal. Navigate to my project.
$ svn update
Command 'svn' not found, but can be installed with:
sudo apt install subversion
The fuck is wrong with me? I haven't used svn in like a solid 10 years. Old habits die hard I guess.4 -
I just got an email that a client changed their DNS zone files to point at a new server. Turns out that they haven't set the server up yet. Client is wondering why that domain's emails aren't working, and why their site is down. They didn't want to give me the Domain's portal login credentials until now, because they "could do it without [me]." Tomorrow morning should be fun.4
-
Got married. Best day of my life. Woke up the next morning to my wife on one side and a fuck load of messages from my boss asking me to fix shit. Quit shortly thereafter.
2 -
Here's a weird gripe: sometimes I wish I loved my job less. It stresses me out but I didn't work at all this weekend and sitting down at my desk early Monday morning I realized I missed it.2
-
I was 7 and the night before Christmas my grandparents asked my mother if she could give me a computer for Christmas, my mom said no. I woke up Christmas morning to a computer sitting on my dining table :p. My mom was pissed2
-
In one of my teams there was this non-IT girl.
One morning, she asks out loud:
G - Can I run a Json?
Me - Wait! What are you trying to do?
G - I need to deploy my changes into the Dev server.
Suddently I realized what she meant.
Me- It's Jenkins! Not Json. :D1 -
There's nothing like the fresh smell of emails on Monday morning, soooooooo fucking many random emails, actually, 2,708 fucking emails, 99.9999999% are stupid useless logs or alerts that have no meaning to me, and yet, I have to setup outlook rules to filter out this shit.
Ah, another glorious Monday 😤3 -
Product manager calls me at 7 PM. "There's gonna be a slight change in the module. You can reuse lot of existing code and I'm sure it won't take much for you to finish. "
Me: Okay, let me take a look at it tomorrow morning.
The next day I saw the spec change.
One and half weeks later, I'm still doing the change.
#FML2 -
Morning there:)
To everyone who’s enjoying / doesn’t but is going to enjoy ( ̀⌄ ́) the DevStory:
here we go, with the third episode.
Leave a comment below and tell me your “dev stories” :)
11 -
Not a rant but I'm not sure if I made the right choice. I got really curious this year in cloud infrastructure and started studying for my AWS Solutions Architect Exam. The company I work for (large company) allows me to switch roles/teams. Last week I was so bored with frontend I requested to switch to the Platform engineering team. The Engineer manager slacked me this morning....
PE Manager: I'll see you at standup this morning.
Me: Cool ill be there at 9, where is it? By the cafe?
PE Manager: No, in hell. Glad you joined the team 😃
What did I get myself into.1 -
Woke up this morning to Amazon charging me over $100 bucks for the web services I used at my Hackathon last month. What the hell, I thought the free tier covered that?13
-
My condolences are with this ranter:
@potata https://devrant.com/rants/1480188/...
Client:"We absolutely need to support browsers from earlier then 2010!"
Me:
-
Fucking Windows 10 forces me to install 'creator's update', messing my morning in which I got to office earlier than normal to be more productive! I really hate Microsoft's products.9
-
I worked really hard to make this girl my friend at work. We go for morning breaks around from 10:00 AM – 10:30 AM.
And then this new guy joined the company sitting close to me and we become friends. This new guy finds my girl friend really awesome and they are getting closer everyday and they are leaving me behind now and separates me with almost all the conversations during morning break meet.
Today, during the morning break. My girl friend said that I have changed and don't talk to her much like I used to. Way back when we met I really clearly told her that I have anxiety and social disorder so please bare with me and she told me that she will be there for me as a good friend.
I'm not sure what to do. I'm going to lose a good friend really soon.5 -
PM: can we fix listed changes today?
Me: hmm, let me check the list out.
PM: because I told the client it would be ready tomorrow morning.
The end. -
My Mum called me at 3am and woke me up last night so this morning I built a bot to message her at 3am. See how she likes it.20
-
My manager calls in to the morning stand-up meeting while driving to the office.
This is dangerous, not just for him but for other drivers.
I want so badly to say something but he's my manager and I'm afraid of reprisal.
He wouldn't listen to me anyway.3 -
When you get called back into work at 5:30 in the morning for an urgent problem... Come to find out its because, "I forgot my internet access password, can you reset it...?" Are you shitting me? Fucking (L)user! In taking today off, fuck this.
-
I got an extremely hard task in the morning, I asked for some clarification and I got them at 13.23.
Boss ask for updates at 13.45 (during lunch pause).
I work on it 2 hours like never before, he calls me and I said I can manage to finish in half an hour + testing.
I work more 10-15 minutes, time is around 16.15.
2 other enormous bugs shows up on the same project, boss ask me to take care of them, and I manage in only 2h to look up something like 40 web pages and correct each of them, write reports and inform the affected people. After it I work more 15 minutes to report and finish small tasks. Ended up working almost 1h more on a non paid extra time working contract.
In the morning, while my boss was aware I spent that time
In the morning boss ask "everything went fine with the big project, right?"
Because
The
Client
Is
Angry.
I already got a burnout from this job, I really can't go on like this.2 -
Woke up this morning to my Macbook completely drained.
Again. 😒
Turns out my USB-C cable had dislodged itself.
Again.
But what *really* pisses me off is why the fuck is my computer completely drained overnight? Did it have the screen on the whole time? I swear I've come down in the morning and the screen on my Macbook is still on. I wouldn't be surprised.
Apple is really losing their touch.1 -
Before internship, js code with semicolons looked stupid to me. Then jshint happened and here I am at 3AM in the morning, adding semicolons to a forgotten but not abandoned design project of mine!
-
How often do you dream about work?
I had a dream about a day's work, and in the morning I have to work again. Who will pay me for another shift?😣1 -
Freelance client calls freaking out because she needed the website changes done by yesterday morning because she had some huge meeting with potential investors....
I feel bad but I don't, she never told me anything about needing it done by Sunday morning.
This is exactly why I hate freelance work. Lack of communication and then they blame you5 -
My fucking stupid idiot neighbor is replaying the same song since morning at max volume. It's killing me! Where can i buy a machete and wipe out this moron's genes from the earth?10
-
Me when considering grabbing a cup of coffee after arriving at my desk in the morning: "Do I want to feel more awake or do I not want to have to poop all day?"1
-
13, my boss told me multiple times to leave, but I had to (for myself) fix someones fuck up first otherwise interns had nothing useful to do in the morning.
Got the next morning a few hours off to make up for that time.2 -
Its 6:57 AM here and I am still awake !! Anyone here today with me ? :D
Good Morning everyone BTW !8 -
My boss and I, with a normal morning greeting in slack
Me: morning boss, how are you?
Boss: very good and you?
Me: marvelous. hey boss, do you have a secret entry to your office? I didn't see you coming
Boss: hahaha, front door :| . And I greeted everyone too
Me: :( sorry
Boss: Microsleep 😂
Me: 😎 nope, extreme concentration
Me: it's a new development methodology, born from extreme programming
Boss: 😶3 -
Devs: Early birds or night owls?
Me: Definitelly night owl, can not wake up before 10 and sometimes working till morning. I know it is bad for health but I can not help myself. Being much more creative and productive at night.12 -
Wake up in the morning and my girlfriend told me I have been mumbling about bugs all night. God, I need new projects, so tired of maintenance work
-
That moment on saturday morning when you realize what you missed for the last 5 months in the framework you are using at work and realize you can delete about 5000 loc with some refactoring...
Fuck guys I just got a huge Eureka moment that probably made me level up.7 -
How to be more productive at morning? Just get alert from PagerDuty that one of core app running out of space and there is nothing you can delete. Call me Speedy Gonzalez
-
Nearly me this morning:
Hi, thanks for reaching out to me to see if we'd be interested in partnering on the attached R&D project. I'd love to read the proposal but first, can we talk about your personal website? I noticed the link in your email footer and it offends my eyes beyond belief. Will there scope in the project to address this issue? -
Random guy : Well, I'm a real developer, I followed a 2 days formation on internet.
Me : Well, I gave 1$ to a homeless this morning, still waiting my Nobel for peace.1 -
Last night me and my friend were on a WhatsApp call discussing how we should practice algorithms and data structures more. We texted the logistics after and he sent me a calendar invite on google. I swear to god this morning I had adds talking about data algorithms all over YouTube but I have never googled this issue in the near past 🤔 this can’t be a coincidence...9
-
Today I noticed that my colleague is using Light Theme and it's pissing me off. I don't know why but I am really obsessed with it since this morning. I don't feel like talking to her now.
Maybe she's trying to torture me. That's so cruel.5 -
I have been working on my javascript project since morning, so i decided to switch to the C project, but i can't stop typing console.log and having the compiler yelling at me.
Am only working with array of characters, but the void.
6 -
So i was workin fron home and there was a bug that was pissing me off since morning. it was a small bug but really annoying, so i threw my pen at it and somehow it hit the bug. Yeh dont think i could do that again1
-
!dev
Two containers had accident this morning. Result? Wasted 45 mins in traffic and my 90 mins commute to office became 135 mins.
// I really don't care about causalities and stuff. Is it me alone who is too self centered? 🤔3 -
Woke up this morning from a stressful week, thought fuck it and booked a nice hotel in York with a pool for me wife and son. Just enjoying yet another pint after an enjoyable day. Ready for the fan covered in shit.4
-
Me: "there's a fatal crash in the build that has gone to testing, this is how we fix it"
Project lead: "they haven't noticed yet, add the feature the boss wants"
Next day, boss:"testing found a fatal crash this morning and couldn't do any testing because of it, how'd it get past you?!" -
Saturday morning. 10am.
Me: happily sleeping on the sofa in a friend's apartment.
Boss calls: 'oh did I wake you up? Can you please develop this mockup over the weekend?'
Being half asleep I agreed.
Well. After 7h without any break it is done. But one Saturday is lost and I'll never get it back :(4 -
So my MacBook's trackpad was behaving weird since this morning. Touch was working fine but for clicks I had to press down hard. Annoyed me all day. Then suddenly now it's fixed itself. So now I'm happy about it but im like, why, how. :/4
-
It’s always hard for me to get up and start coding each morning, but once I do I always feel good about the work I’m doing.1
-
In the morning PM told me that a project home page skinning is due tomorrow afternoon. Few minutes ago, she said that another project application is due tomorrow.1
-
Every morning I start visual studio code from cmd... So I wanted to make a script to open that specific folder and start it in code...
The time I spent trying to make this thing is longer than the time it would take me to start code every morning.
Guess I'm no hackerman :/9 -
I'm assuming me pc heard me last night, because the gobblecocking twat wouldn't POST this morning.
I had to take her power of completely and then the bitch started updating windows 10.
Its time to make linux the main gaming platform!
If it wasn't for gaming, windows wouldn't even exist anymore3 -
"git checkout HEAD ." Instead of "git reset HEAD ." Smeg! Just shoot me. I'm going to bed and restarting in the morning like today never happened.5
-
AM BIOS: "Hi, I am your new Kaby Lake Motherboard. Nice to see you on my first ever run. I have seen that you have some disks attached to me. They must be new because I am ....Let me initialize a raid on them."
Me: o0 (W)ell (T)hat's (F)antastic!*
* Finished restoring a 6TB Backup to my raidz mirrors this morning at 6am, fuuuuu**
** Kaby Lake Rocks nonetheless2 -
(Saturday morning)
Me: I've never been so long without exercising (since before this, my first winter), I should get in shape now that this God forsaken weather is finally reaching livable levels.
(some time later at the gym)
Also me: You've always been in good shape, why stop with just chest, let's do some arms and shoulders.
(48 hours later, Monday morning)
I had to turn my whole torso to look if any car was coming while walking to the library, moved like terminator because of the massive neck muscle pain, suffered through the pain of setting up all my study material to the realize (just now) I can't even fucking look down to my notebook... Can I be more stupid? -
So I have an ancient PC at home that has been refusing to boot for the past 3 days. It somehow magically worked this morning and THE POWER WENT OUT FOR 1 MILLISECOND WHILE I WAS WORKING AND IT'S NOT WORKING ANYMORE GODDAMMIT FLUCTUATIONS WHY MUST YOU DO THIS TO ME
-
Looking for internships for the summer, a comp. sends me a email at 3 in the morning and I had emails from them flagged and my phone woke me up. I'm not mad about rejection but rather why send me a email at 3 I like to sleep sometimes.1
-
Morning: Received an update from designer
All day: implementing update
End of day: receive an update on the previous update with major changes
Me: I don't care if they don't have wifi in jail! 🔫😒2 -
My teacher called me to the University that is a mile away from my dorm room at 10 am in the morning jsut to tell me that i have a spelling mistake on the website.
Dude a screenshot would have been fine 😑 -
How to deal with a boss who wants you to work overtime for free?
Me rightnow: Working overtime for free on a sunday morning 😂32 -
We expanded offices. Management didn't tell me.. just literally "oh we got this new suite, setup a new internet line, and you need to set it all up this morning because we will be working in that space."
Very difficult to do when they won't give you a key...1 -
They want what?! Call me away from vacation even though I'm not employed there anymore because they are to STUPID to read a FUCKING EMAIL?!
I sent the mail to THREE PEOPLE with the path to the docs and friggin TRIPLE CHECKED THE PATH AND FILES...
"Yeah could you please be there tomorrow morning?"2 -
wish can do coding in fix hours :(
Learning react .. just took one cup of tea in morning.. and dang its 8pm :( No idea about the time.. react giving me hard time. maybe am newbie ..
Hope so I learn this Single Page application4 -
I don't know what's wrong with me this morning. I started refactoring, and I know I'm overdoing it. I can't stop myself. I'm stuck fiddling over it like a meth head scratching his skin.
Please stop me. I'm hurting the code.2 -
From an actual job posting I found this morning
**software performs as documented and it can not be broken once it gets into the hand of the customer**
I_AM_NOT_GOD!!!
(but if I were you would have to pay me better)
2 -
Got added to a really exciting project in the morning by PMO, by the afternoon my manager had pulled me back to work on his boring project. Oh how the turns tables2
-
For me I was so amazed by the fact I could control computers it was pretty much a morning til night thing every day for a month (which happened to be my study leave for exams I didn't want to revise for but hey! I landed a job in dev so
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )1 -
Moved all my configuration to json files from normal JS last night. It took me 10 mins to convert. Everything worked perfectly.
This morning I woke up with angry messages from everyone in the team. No one could run their code anymore. It took me whole day to find out that those jsons were the issue. I still don't know how though. 😥1 -
Who the fuck programs grandfather clock to go off after 3 in the morning ... You scared the shit out of me
-
Am I the only one whose daily morning routine is not only reading through devRant feed, but also catching up on the devRant issue tracker? Love me some discussions there :D1
-
#weeklyroutine Every monday morning wake up and watch new episode of silicon valley.
Loved It.Tell me about your experience3 -
This morning, I was logging in on the site I was working on without problem.
After lunch, I couldn't log in. No reason why.
Then I found out why. Someone modified the login in database, and warned everyone.
Everyone except the ones that are working on the website (me and my team).1 -
Helped dad around the house yesterday. It made me feel a tad less depressed, until this morning when I looked at job ads again. 😒10
-
Me: aah finally the best in the morning MY COFFEE
Also me a half hour later: Uhm fuck my coffee is cold.1 -
Boss(at 5pm): Do you think we will have a full app by tomorrow morning
Me (in mind): we are all leaving office when do u think i will work on those features2 -
So I was talking to my gf (a filosopher) about why I don't like a Cisco ad.
She sent me this, this morning. . .
Have you heard about it? Where can I learn more?
2 -
Man... I hate refactoring. After I had finished up an issue this morning, I had to refactor old sql queries and the parsing to the views.
I've worked on it all day and I still haven't finished! Still loving my job, tasks like these are unavoidable but they drain the life out of me.3 -
Yesterday I told an intern that was supposed to be shadowing me that he'll need to download visual studios with apache Cordova plugin for multi platform app design. I gave this assignment to him first thing in the morning (around 9:30 am) and told him to head home for the day thinking I was giving the kid a break to download and make sure the build was proper and to play around with it maybe. I check my inbox this morning to find that, alongside numerous expletives, this intern has quit as of 3:40 AM last night. I... I didn't see that one coming.4
-
Took a SWAG at stand-up this morning, saying I thought I could resolve a circular dependency introduced in a junior's branch by noon. As the morning dragged on, I became less and less certain of it, but lo! and behold I managed to refactor my way out of hell with 2 minutes to spare!
This calls for lunch beer! Which management has no way of stopping me from doing on a regular day due to remote working, but at least today I've convinced myself I earned it.1 -
Alarm clock Pi that reads news headlines and weather cast to me in the morning.
Not impressive but it’s the project I enjoyed most.. -
Was in a rush this morning and left my coffee on the counter.
I have a meeting in an hour and a half with a snotty motherfucker of an external client.
For his sake, I need to get my fix (because an interruption to my morning routine makes me a bit less tolerant of bullshit.) -
I know nothing about this.
Let's say your computer is on all night, and then you hit it in the morning, just re-activating all your windows... for me, it's always like a 10 minute wait until it "catches up".
I realized this morning, like, why doesn't it optimize itself while I'm away, so that when i do come back, that 10 min wait doesn't happen.
I'm sure they have thought of this, so why does it take so fucking long to wake up your computer.3 -
Every morning now you’ll see me at a Starbucks with a larger hot water pouring instant coffee packets into it
I’m not ashamed
Even if I was was rich I wouldn’t pay 15.00 for a fucking coffee lol
I call it a Starbucks workaround lol35 -
Getting along woth my incompetent boss. I have 4 bosses and 3 of them are great, 1 of them got an email from me this morning detailing why he stresses me out and was the reason my predecessor quit.5
-
- at night -
Laptop: I'll stop working for you!
Me: Never make decisions at night!
*laptop stops working*
- the next morning -
*laptop is working* -
I submitted my code for review yesterday. Got a reply this morning about this particular code:
result.getString("name").
He's asking me to "create a generic method instead that will accept a key and return a value".
i want to flip my table now. -
Guy sitting next to me on my morning commute working on a presentation called "Containerizing The Assembly Line"... I feel sorry for his devs if that's how he thinks of them.
-
Almost at the end of every day i say that im going to quit this company because of this lot of shit and me not being able to work with those conditions .. The day after i just go to work in the morning and say it's going to be fine ...
I feel like this is killing me .. Am i the only one with this situation ?2 -
My new passion in life is to spend a whole morning trying to figure out why I can't create a thumbnail with node-imagemagick, only to discover that I forgot an 's' to the output directory.
FUCK. ME.2 -
university server will be down tomorrow morning around 8am to 12pm. i wanted to finish my code tomorrow morning :(
more sleep for me though ! -
Unable to access cpanel/whm due to IP changed error.
called HR
me : please connect me to networking team (out sourced)
hr : why ?
me : I have some issue to access cpanel. I contacted to hosting comapny but it is not their fault so may be it's our network issue.
hr : explain me in details.
me : ok
from morning I am trying to access whm because our website is out of bandwidth limit and showing 509 error ,I contacted to hosting comapny but they explained me problem from our side. SO i wanted to talk with network team about this issue because I am not using any proxy or vpn even my tor browser is off too still ip chaged error giving frustation. second reason I am frusted that my public IP and private IP is not chaged.
one more your windows pc freeze 3 times from morning.
do you need in detailed technical reason why I want to talk with them.
hr : no no no *hang up*
after 2 minute *my landline ring*
hr : network engineer on other side.
fair enough2 -
Me: why did I wake up so early in the morning? 🤔
Brain: to poop 💩
Me: damn it ok!
*just finished pooping*
Brain: hey your finished pooping, don't pretend! You're just browsing devRant. Go back to sleep! 😡
Me: oh come on man?
Me: *thinks (well I like devRant and sleep so I will sleep and dream about devRant 😂)*
Me: ok brain, I'll just wash then go back to sleep 🙃6 -
I spent the week working on an adapter to a specific format, the client came this morning to tell us Json would also have worked. Then why didn't you tell me earlier?!?
-
So a friend / batch-mate in our accelerator asked me if I was okay with installing a monitoring software for a client our startups are collaborating for. And the said client was ranting how I've been appearing offline to him since morning...
Bitch I'm already letting you monitor my shit from morning to night, I don't need your French ass snooping around what I'm doing outside of office hours.
Fucker. -
Hey, listen. If the first thing you have to say to me in the morning is nothing but a whining story of what "terrible" stuff happend again.
SHUT THE FUCK UP 'CAUSE I CARE AS MUCH AS I CAN SEE TWO STUPID ASS-TO-MOUTH FUCKING ALIENS BEYOND THE BORDERS OF THE FUCKING VISIBLE UNIVERSE!2 -
Do I write a purchase requisition, wait for it to be signed off, wait three days for it to be ordered, wait another day for receiving to notify me it's in... Or do I pay for the $12 worth of parts myself and have them in by the next morning?3
-
My new favourite is
user.leaveFloater()
Got me out of a jam this morning. For more context see: https://www.devrant.io/rants/220317 -
class Me(Person):
def day(self, mood):
self.morning()
self.job.start()
while True:
if self.job.time > 28800:
break
self.job.work()
self.job.end()
self.afternoon()
self.evening()
def morning(self):
self.say("Hello World!")
if mood == bad:
self.be_grumpy()
self.__super__.morning()5 -
Well....this shit again
This morning or technical manager calls me in his office and says he needs to discus something
sits me down and started talking about a project he needs
A school management system says he presented some demos at the client yesterday but they didn't really like options at the table
Manager: So can you get us something really quick?
Me: Well... what's the time line?
Manager: They needed this like yesterday!
Me: Aaaah....well i think i can have something by 2moro morning
Manager: Aaah! No!.... 2moro it's too late need something like fast
Me: Ok so will look for some online solutions and open source projects
Me:.....
Opens browser, opens github, download project, runs project
project isnt looking good enough
starts designing UI
Manager:
downloads a system
installes
runs
closes
reopens
meet with a "Buy to continue using system" message
calls me
Manager: this was just a demo now it needs payment what should we do
Me: I'll come up with something by 2moro1 -
I hope that when I wake up in the morning, the racket code I just wrote from midnight to 3am makes as much sense to me as it does at the time of writing.
Banana Language always seems to flow easier when exhausted. -
So the company I work for assigned me to a new clients project and has already proven to be a pain.
I checked all my emails late Sunday evening and replied to them (saves me the time in the morning) so I emailed this new client who was enquiring when a part of his website was to be done.
Me: I fully expect this portion of the functionally to be done by the tail of the week.
Client first thing this morning: why isn’t anything working you said it would be done.
Me: ...4 -
My body decided to work against me
Last 3 days my “sleep schedule” has been “stay in bed with eyes closed until it’s morning without falling asleep”
If I go insane please tell my dog she was adopted. Ah… insanity is starting to kick in, next steps I’m defending pascal and managers…2 -
There are 43 people in our team. Every 43 of them come to salute me in the morning, fuck off, let me work. Just go ahead with your shit but leave me alone.4
-
Me looking for motivation to get out of bed and go to class in the morning.
"Devrant will be faster with the college WiFi when you browse in class rather than in your room".1 -
Always fun when you leave 7-zip to run overnight then you check in the morning and it says not enough disk space. Now I need to spend most of the morning getting stuff to external drives. 7-zip why couldn't you give me that error last night so I didn't become angry when I looked.1
-
Every morning both coworkers that sit by my side are listening to music in full volume on their earphones. The noise I hear is driving me nuts6
-
When integrating our system with a 3rd party company to use their billing system, we had a Hangouts chat so we could ask things about their documentation, API, etc...
Me: *explain the problem and how I tried to solve it without success, and proceed to ask 3 things*
*2h of silence*
3rd.p: Good Morning
Me: Good Morning
*another 2h of silence*
Me: ...and?
*1h of silence*
3rd.p: *answer randomly one of the questions*
Me: ok, and the other two questions?
*silence until the next day*
Me: ???
3rd.p: *answer one question and says that the other will never happen*
Me: but... I've just sent a request to your backend and it happened!!!
*2h of silence*
3rd.p: No, you are reading this wrong, we didn't respond that
Me: This is the endpoint i'm calling and the request's payload, send this to your backend.
*silence until the next day*
(and this continues to almost 2 months to complete the integration that should not need more than 1 week)3 -
My space key is not coming back once i clicked . Served like 10 years. It deserve better end than this. damn it guys we lost him. He was so close to retirement. Just this morning he said to me " I am too tired of this board". Its fairwell brother.13
-
Holy hell some of you people are crazy. 16 hrs for me. Usually when I get really pissed at a bug and stay up till 5 in the morning to fix it.
-
Me at 9 pm working on a project: this will only take a couple minutes...
Me a few minutes later: fuck, it's three in the morning...
And that's why I have sleep issues. -
Next job I find has to be entertaining somewhat. I thought I could deal with boring work but I'm tired of it.I It's just so damn boring. I'm not even writing new code anymore, I'm just updating dependency versioning and restructuring tests. It's bumming me out seriously. The mental fatigue from struggling to keep my eyes open every day leaves me struggling to get out of bed in the morning.6
-
All I wanted for Christmas is a personal barista who gives me great coffees in the morning. #badatcoffeemaking #stilllovecoffeethough4
-
New version release Saturday morning. We have 3 hours window I plan to do it in 15 minutes and don’t loose weekend.
Wish me luck.6 -
There's nothing like that feeling on your face...
When you get a new project...and you've been writing project requirements & scope docs for 20 hours...
As you somber towards bed...what is that tickle on my cheek? Oh. Just eye blood.
That's a morning-me problem.3 -
Firefox faceslapped me with a UI change this morning. Looks like the default CSS is changed too. Outlines are not dashed boxes but solid dark blue lines. I feel weird.
5 -
(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻
It's 4AM in the morning I and after a pleasent past 4 days, I woke up to this piece of fucked up forced feed shit.. me whole PC is stuck in boot and makes no noise after Windows forced fucked me on every single I/O with their shit piece of orgy:ed up excuse of an update.... Dear good.. this is the best fucking start of a week..... ಠ╭╮ಠ
So fucking done with this pile of bukkake.. Ubuntu, take me in!!2 -
I‘m currently building a dashboard to get me on the newest data every morning. Anybody has an idea what kind of widget i could implement other than calendar, weather, to-do lists?10
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Why that fucking guilt that shallowness that ass freaking short breath when I have said on Monday morning that I will arrive late by lunch to office , and that fucking too when I have a genuine fucking reason and work to do.
What fucking mind I have
Help me ranters -
My vps made me crazy last night when it showed me no space left on device, & i was like wtf dude merely using 2gb out of 50gb. The providers support almost convinced me to do a fresh install my already heavily configured vps. Then all of a sudden the vps back to normal this morning and I again was like wtf dude my night wasted on this shit 😒3
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Today gonna be one of those woozy days.
Could only fall asleep at like 3:30 or 4:00 in the morning. Had serious allergic reaction or itchy disease starting from two palms. No med at home. Could only scratch and endure. And the fucking itch was moving from one body part to another throughout the night.
Went to the morning appointment and now heading office. One cup of coffee and one can of energy drink in me. Might add more juice in me later at office.5 -
Thought I'd be nice and open one of those railway gates for a lady (it was broken, so everyone had to in order to get to the trains). Did that, lady thanked me, and dropped the gate on my head....
Great morning so far!6 -
I was writing a random rant about something that happened to me this morning, and the app decide to crash a second before I could post it.
I get it devRant, my stories aren't interesting, but you could at least have crash at the beginning and not after I have already spent half an hour writing the story :( -
Client sent feedback on saturday, mailed me with complaints on Monday morning and even texted me hour later...
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Facebook rant incoming!
I'm so pissed off with Facebook right now, woke up this morning to check Facebook and it asked me to submit a photo of myself (it's not like Facebook doesn't already have many photos of me), then after submitting it logs me out "for security reasons". The only thing I've done different since the last time I was on Facebook was add someone.... If Facebook doesn't approve my photo I will just say fuck it and stay off Facebook.1 -
Company shutting down has its perks : after going to the bar with colleagues, ended up doing an after party with HR in the office, drinking cherry flavoured vodka
Tomorrow morning is going to hit as hard as a fucking truck, poor me being the rabbit caught in the lights in the middle of the road.. -
!rant
This morning I went to our PM.
After he went down on his knees and prayed to me (Yes. I managed to do a Feature he wanted soon) we watched a product gif of a new release of the framework we're using.
We watched it for 10 minutes. Was very relaxing
I think we're getting crazy -
I was so close to switching to windows until this automated update just prevented me from working all morning....
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Me yesterday: "I have too much projects... maybe I should shelve some..."
My head this morning: "I have this splendid new idea for you to work on"2 -
Have the technical defense of the practice project a company asked me to work on tomorrow, as part of the selection process.
Fingers crossed they don't realize I have no idea about Spring or webdev... I've already prepped a fair bit, and will a bit more in the morning before the call. Now, my bed is calling, so if you'll excuse me... -
I love my job,
this is how my normal day goes:
me: *turns on computer*
computer: Good morning, erandria. What will your first sequence of the day be? -
I was playing with the october cms this morning and I just can't imagine this shot beeing faster than me using plain stuff. 😕
Tell me your opinions on this.6 -
Conversation with fellow dev this morning:
Him: What are the chances of putting an API for this in to staging?
Me: I'm working on it now.
Him: Good stuff, so if I check this other one, it should go through?
Me: Yes, it should.
Him: I'll test it now, because "should" === "shudder"
Me: "should" == "shudder", but "should" !== "shudder" 😉
Him: Shud up 😆 -
You work on your code in the evening..no errors...
Go present to friend/colleague/manager/client the following morning...
Your program throws out a bunch of errors..At that point you tell it, "why do you hate me!!??" -
Project has been in flight for months. Solution design complete. Last minute major scope change by management. And I'm about to start rewriting a high level solution design doc to reflect their sudden change now. Due first thing in the morning. Its almost 12:30am local time.
Kill me!1 -
Me: removed appsettings.development.json from git index, because every time we pull, we have to correct the files of 8 api's, just to be able to build that ducktape solution
Other devs: we can't build anymore, our appsettings.development.json are gone!!!!!
Manager: (total silence on my 'good morning') you broke our application!!!!
Me: checks 8 appsettings.development.json in
Almost everybody HAPPY3 -
What a lovely Sunday morning...debugging a double free on a GTK+ software I'm writing! It will take me ages to find it xD
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Anyone who wakes up in the morning just to destory some people's egos someday?
I know i need to see a therapist but this shit motivates me like nothing else6 -
Hm... Looks like they caught me cheating online and reset my game save to like a month ago...
So basically I wasted 2wks... for nothing...
I was so close to making an in game purchase this morning.... Good thing I didn't.
And now back to doing more productive things with my time...18 -
Monday morning. Updated my IDE. Updated my browser. Ran npm upgrade. Encountered new bugs. Why can't our industry focus on releasing stable software and shipping updates that reduce bugs without introducing new ones? I thought everyone except for me must be doing 100% test-driven development by now, especially the corporate devs?7
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Good morning devRant community, so currently im on my early morning commute to College, and it got me thinking.
So I’m very passionate about programming but i also love playing around with the Stock Markets, Are there Software Engineering positions which work with the markets? I’ve been thinking its called a “Quant” but im not too sure, Also does anyone have any possible experience within the field? What it takes to get in etc?.
I highly appreciate it! Hope you have an amazing day/night. :-)10 -
Today, my boss comes up to me to tell me that the CR he had me set up was not created by the release manager because there wasn't a QA test ticket or DBA review ticket. Look, if you're gonna shoot shit down without any bullets loaded, at least have the safety off because you had 3 hours on Friday to tell me that before leaving it to Monday morning when my head is hotter than the roast I'm sippin' on.
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Yeah, it's Friday morning and guess what I left my laptop work yesterday and who just got a text saying that the server is on their ass.. yeah you are right ME. And my team who can do the same job as me on restarting the application don't ever take action on this kind of thing... Well I hope they will in a few weeks because I will be gone then2
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I'm following a course to become a Fullstack Web Developer. We have class in the morning and in the afternoon we get some "homeworks" to do. In the afternoon we are followed by some tutors that help us understand better what we did in the morning.
I have this one tutor that never answers to my doubts regarding bugs and errors (in my homeworks) and opens new doubts and problems I didn't think I had..
Why do ppl have to do this, like I'm alreay having one trouble that makes me feel unsecure.. Why do you make things bad and never help? -
Solved a seeder issue this morning that has been plaguing me since Sunday. Glad to know I just hadn't refreshed composer, and my code was functional 😥
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Mondays aren't the best time for me.
If it is a lazy weekend, this is the routine:
Sleep most of the morning in, wake up - do things, 10PM, think of some code to work on. 11PM, yeah, enough energy now - lets code! -
So I created simple blog for family member. She only writes three posts within a six month time frame, and then this morning she sends me an email asking for some changes. In it says if it's to time consuming that she can create a blogspot...
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goddamnshitmotherfuckingshit wtf brain? why do all the examples just work, but my code looking similar just doesn´t. why the fuck is this basic thumbsucking baby topic of a scrollable canvas screwing me over since this morning?2
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!rant - Thanks to whoever it was who reminded me of the DevRant Spotify Playlist. I had some epic tuneage to start work with this morning. I'm loving some Black Stone Cherry (I don't have to wait for them to come on Planet Rock). (Also, Grammarly recognised the word 'Tuneage'.6
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!rant
This morning a coworker comes to me and has been like "I've been compiling this list of all the files on our network that have x in the title for a week now"
I'm like do you want me to use a recursive Powershell script to get you that list in like 10 minutes.
The little things that make you invaluable at work because you are the sole tech guy. -
Graveyard shift sucks. I'm a morning person. My body clock is broken. I still can't sleep. Damn. Perks of being a high paid slave living in a rat race 🤷♂️
I just read that snickers can make you fall asleep. Will eat one now. Wish me luck guys.
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Finding out this morning that Firepath is not showing xpath nodes anymore. Why?? Is it me or last update screwed what it was a really good tool?
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No one: ...
Me in Monday morning: "The mysqli extension is missing. please check your php configuration. wamp" -
This morning on devRant is an example of Zimmerman trying to make me insane
With his delusional comments about the supposed meanings of what the number of notifications I have is
Which by the way suddenly did balloon2
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