Too early for node_modules joke?

True story

No I will not disable my AdBlocker to view your content.

I'll just disable JS in browser.
*Troll face*

I'm just happy.

God, I love trolling!

I've done it. I've deactivated my facebook. No more useless BuzzFeed videos. Fuck Facebook

> be me
> last hour in office
> trying to figure out solution
> figured out a plausible solution
> write the code
> power outage before I compile

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Well, on the bright side I committed it locally...

I feel old now....

Nobody:

LinkedIn: "Someone looked at your profile! IF YOU GIVE US FIFTY DOLLARS PER MONTH WE WILL TELL YOU WHO IT IS"

Me : I'll get this issue done before the deadline

Eclipse:

This fucker has some balls (I'm being completely ignorant), the day his website goes live guess who is going to flood it with Dados attacks.

UTF-8 is love, UTF-8 is life ♥️

me: your code base is vulnerable, you are not using prepared statements
him: not an issue, nobody knows
me: ...
me: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Took only 10-20 mins to resolve merge conflict

Me : *writes something (physically), for a very long period of time*

Me : *pretends to press CTRL + S*

Me : ummmm... okay

Dear Marketing Guy,

You had no right to manipulate the perfectly working "WordPress" site, but since you have done it by injecting a script you found on the internet in functions.php, It is now my unpaid job to fix this mess.

Yours truly,
Underpaid Developer

P.S. Fuck you

Fucking moronic clients like these make me want to drop the project, needless to say I dropped the project immediately. I know it's highly unethical but fuck it.

On top of that I was doing charity work by charging 1/8th of my usual rate and this fucking idiots thinks that he is teaching/spoonfeeding me for his project, moron, I made micro library for that much amount of money.

Loss is loss and integrity is integrity..

this is next level

Got PHP Internship interview lined up tomorrow...
First ever real interview...big step for young me
Wish me luck guys

I'll just leave this here..

Friend calls, who never called in a decade.

Me : Hii...

F : Hey...I used this auto-liker on FB and I'm following......

ME : *Disconnect*

I felt anger and depression all at once.

devs I present to you the most helpful message by a Banking app

Why don't school and colleges don't teach git?

Who else can relate?

> be me
> post question on stackoverflow
> get -4 without any comments
> deletes question because I like my score
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Hmmmmm... How exactly??

*Elon Musk posts something on twitter*

*Every other devRant user* : oh how funny let me screenshot it and post on devRant

PascalCase for life, what about you?

Gooooood morning, 🦆 ducks!

this is not even meme || rant

Clearly, my average commits/per day define my dedication towards work.

Command Line > GUI

I guess scriptkiddies get offended too soon. Thanks for the hate.

P.S. : I'm not stopping to downvote improper questions on SO

So, I guess, it's Halloween

Found on telegram

I've made up my mind, I'm leaving this toxic environment, the current company and making a switch. FUCK IT

FUCKING USELESS 'FRIENDS' WHO ONLY CALL/MESSAGE FOR HELPING THEM TO CHOOSE TO SELECT APPROPRIATE LAPTOP FOR THEIR 'PURPOSE'. IM FUCKING DONE. THIS IS the THIRD TIME IN THIS WEEK. STOP GETTING ON MY GODDAMN NERVES. VISIT AMAZON FOR FUCKS SAKE, APPLY FILTERS AND BOOYAH MAGIC. YOU GET A FUCKING VARIETY OF LAPTOPS TO CHOOSE FROM. BUT NO YOU WON'T, BECAUSE YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO FUCKING USE AMAZON.

To all those fellow devs who wish to have a girlfriend,

Please don't, she'll be a distraction, unless she's in IT

I wrote code yesterday, that functions the way it is supposed to.

I do not understand my code today.

> stack overflow goes down
> almost every Dev loses their shit

the banner speaks it for all....

> be me
> post-well-structured question on SO
> very next millisecond, the question gets downvoted
> ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Yeah all these js files for one static page, hardly one or two functions are getting called.

When you're so desparate to override the css class of bootstrap but it's not working

I hate my college

So our government is going to summon individuals who have invested in Bitcoin, suspecting they might be hiding 'Black Money' under the name of Bitcoin...

Guess the government

Goooooooooooood morning, devRant, This is me after 8 hours of work, and barely 5 hours of sleep followed.

WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU ASSIGNING PROD BUGS WHEN I'M ON A FUCKING VACATION ?!?

Oh wait I wrote that code...

Welp

>be me
>join new firm
>only developer
>Task : Migrate our PHP based website to reactjs
>okay not bad, I can do this
>*Completes in 2 days*
>get inputs from boss and he gives
>go back again to inform we're now SASS integrated
>asks for new wireframes
>wtf lol.exe
>wants new design for the same website like of the parent company which is WordPress template
>*Internally : I'm a developer, I don't do wireframes*
>okay no problem

Seriously, if you wanted a new design in the first place why didn't you said so?

Here I am sitting outside presentation room right before me last presentation of this semester, I've got a bad feeling that I might fuck this up. Wish me luck guys and gals.

ALRIGHT! I'LL GIVE YOU SUPPORT ON MY VACATION TOO, IT'S NOT LIKE I HAVE FRIENDS AND FAMILY, NOPE, ALL I CARE ABOUT IS YOUR UNSTRUCTURED PHP CODE WHICH NEEDS TO BE REFACTORED BECAUSE 2 VISITORS ON YOUR WEBSITE SUGGESTED SO!

> be me
> alright time to seek a new job
> open glassdoor
> see a good front end job
> apply.exe
> redirects to another page to apply
> iamnotevenmad
> try to fill the form
> fill first name
> fill last name
> first name disappears
> fml
> check console
> someone forgot to preventDefault the event
> fuck it, i'll post a rant on devrant

I hate my boss

I just wanna say thank you @dfox and @trogus for this wonderful community. Love you all.

So started job hunting and stumbled upon this
1. Skill required in PHP, Laravel, CakePHP, Wordpress, Opencart.

2. Bootstrap, CSS3 and HTML5 experience preferred.

3. JQuery, Vue.js, Angular.js, JavaScript, AJAX, HTML experience highly preferred.

and will pay 8000Rs/Month (112.88 USD)

Do they even know what they want? and at what cost they want to hire?

Woke up to see this, okay arch fanbois we get it, you're supreme with an is which is difficult to install and after achieving it you become the most supreme

First post.
Ah, finally a place like stack overflow where no one will down vote me!

I need help hacking a Facebook account? Can you help me?

*Unfriended instantly*

Just show the Exception and be done with it

Oh, boy, do I hate recruiters...

So today I attended a Job fair, which mentioned it will be 'walk-in' interview for every company present there, only to find out they were mass recruiters, FUCK ME.

1. Write answers on the back of your resumes.
2. Group interview

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!!!

On point number 2, HOW THE FUCK DO YOU ANALYZE SKILL OF A FUCKING CROWD OF 20 PEOPLE ALL TOGETHER!!!!???

Top of that I paid for this shit! I can hope for only the best now.....

I hate birthday celebration(s) at office, that's why I choose to not to disclose my birth-date..

Just gonna put it here

"The logo and pictures are taking time to load, can you please look into it?"

That's the whole point of lazy loading you fucking moron.

A picture says thousand words

I hate that I love flexbox

True story

> Got offer for nodejs via LinkedIn
> When I appeared, the interview was for Javascript and frontend
> "Based on your skills we are calling in you another interview for Sr. PHP developer"

Can marketing (and PM) asshats take a moment, think about the word "just", the amount of time they are using it and STOP USING AT ALL. It's fucking irritation to hear that word.

for example, it just needs to be get done, OR

just do an AJAX call and it'll be done.

!dev

I'm a very patient and calm person when it comes to coding or social events and the only thing that "triggers" me is accuracy.

You've made plans to have a small reunion and with people, you hardly meet, once or twice in a year and yet you somehow fail to show at 11:00 am in the morning which was already planned.

Now it's time to call each of you and hear out your ridiculous explanation of how you stayed up late watching Instagram videos of cute kittens and fell asleep late.

> "Oh I just woke up, I'll be there directly there in an hour, I know I promised we'll go together, but I have this thing to deal with"

> "Hey, do you know who reached till there? Are you there yet? What's the plan?" - Bitch the plan was to be there by 11 AM, 11 FUCKING AM.

> "Heyyyy, just woke up, give me an hour I'll pick you up"

Seriously this makes me sad and disappointed because I'm a man of the time. Sometimes I think they do this just to test my patience.

There is not enough time, there never was, there never will be.

With that being said my holiday is ruined and what's up with you?

> inb4 don't let others ruin your holiday

TL;DR: shitty day, but stickers made my day

First off, I'd like to thank @dfox and @trogus for the stickers.

I had a really shitty day, It started off something like this. Usual day at University, faculty not teaching anything. Messed up shit with the girl I like very much, still not talking at this point. Pretty much downhill. Start teaching myself some Android, while this junior comes up me to be like 'please teach me this', ok sure. He fucking leaves the moment I start installing homebrew on his mac and says "you exploiting my mac", NO FUCKER I NEED A PACKAGE MANAGER TO GET PACKAGES YOU DUMB FUCK. Further, that day, come to know its half day and not going to learn shit. WTF! But still, I get attendance so it's good. I suggest going to this new cool place to grab lunch. the girl I like goes like this "Let's GO TO JAILLLLLLLLL, IT'S COOL PLACE TO HANGOUTTTTT" , LIKE. WHY THE FUCK YOU WANT TO HANG OUT AT A PLACE WHICH LITERALLY IS NAMED 'JAIL'. Fuck it, let's go. SO. FUCKING. NEGATIVE. PLACE. Food is ok, not good, ok. I'm fucked up and sad at this point because love of my life is hanging out with other people, I'm ended up in the shit corner of the world, with shit food. AND I HAVEN'T DONE ANY THING PRODUCTIVE.

But in the end of the day, I reach home. open gates see this parcel and I'M HAPPY AS FUCK. IT'S FUCKING STICKERS, OMG.

Seeing those stickers I realized I don't need to be sad anymore. Writing this post just to thank this amazing community and the members in it. I love you guys all, :) <3

#FuckPHPInTheAss

>Start working on PHP after ages.
>Found that mail() is deprecated through server support
>they suggest to use PEAR Mail
>Suggest to use deprecated PEAR code
>Fix deprecated code and magically runs on localhost
>ohmygodyess.php
>try to run on server
>fuckMyLife.exe
>Try using PHPMailer
>WTF is this How the fuck this works?
>Spends hours to understand with example code
>WorksFinOnLocal.exe
>NopeIWon'tRunOnServe.lulz
>about to use YiiMailer.

#Sleepless

Look at this obsolete (shit) . Though I love PHP

Clients be like, why the fuck should I bother to check last commits related to tickets when I can just bother the developer when he's about to sleep...

(tl;dr) Protip: never take internship/training/job offers from startups.

Fucking piece of shit startups hiring innocent interns from University, hoping that they are full stack developers to build their shit website.
"I will throw challenges at you".

You fucking scum, I need a proper mentor to teach me something which is not my fucking domain. You expect me to know nodejs and reactjs, and if I don't know that means there's something wrong with my learning process?!!

I'm looking for an internship which basically means that I get company exposure to proper training unlike being your fucking slave, you uncultured swine.

Seriously, recruiters, these days jack off to google buzzwords.

!dev

Why do I hate my extended family coming over for lunch and dinner you ask?

> kids, who will ruin the remote by pressing the keys so hard, I'll have to get a new remote.

> NO PEACE. I'll have to move from my comfort spot to another spot where, again kids, will come and ask if I have "GAMES" in my mobile or laptop

> and this happened after lunch while watching a movie which I never watched before, my imbecile cousin decides to spoil the entire movie just like that, like, FUCK YO, LIKE REALLY, I KNOW YOU'RE MY RELATIVE IN SOME WAY, BUT FUUUUUUCK YOUUUUUU, spoilers is one of the things I cannot stand.

> I really do not like to be annoyed again and again and again and again, so please stop asking me if I want to have lunch or dinner with everyone because I really HATE the talk during that time.

> I leave my laptop for one microsecond and they surround it like scavengers, I MEAN FOR FUCKS SAKE, GIVE ME MY PRIVACY, (I have my own room, but it's under renovation).

The best I could do was to put on headsets and pretend like I'm working while browsing LinkedIn.

> "Oh I see you have HD TV, but the picture is blurred" NO SHIT, SHERLOCK, It is due to I chose not to buy HD Pack because I live stream HD Channels and cable is a backup

saddest day of my life when system log gives me this

failed with status [ERROR]! - see null for further information

Stackoverflow in a nutshell...

I fucking hate working on someone else's unfinished project, and even that for FREE.

I made changes in production on Friday, surprisingly nothing has been reported yet!

Fuck android studio in the ass with cactus.

*starts learning Android*
*Builds simple application with 1 Button, 1 TextView and 1 EditText*

At this point, I haven't implied any logic or code in MainActivity.java.

*Hit Run*
*Gradle Build*

*Meanwhile, eat lunch*
*Still Gradle Build*

*After 2 Eternity, Build finished*

Fucking, slow peice of shit. I'm rebuiliding the App, because the AVD timedout while running.

It's Friday morning, I haven't had my coffee yet and already stumbled upon 2 bugs in staging. How did QA miss this on development?

Oh wait, we don't have QA!

When college professors want students to do college portal's works.
ACCEPT THE FUCKING WORK.

DO NOT CHANGE THE INITIAL REQUIREMENT WHILE I'M WORKING ON IT.

DO NOT CHANGE MY WORK WITHOUT ASKING ME OR AT THE LEAST NOTIFYING ME.

YOUR PORTAL LOOK HORRIBLE NOW WITH SHIT TIER MENU WHICH I SUGGESTED IN THE FIRST PLACE THAT IT WOULD LOOK GOOD THIS WAY. AND NOW YOU'VE MADE IT LOOK SO BAD MY EYES HAVE CANCER.

inline CSS counts?

I'm not super proud

I'd rather die than work with iframes

WTF Google 😂😂

Why am I sad, depressed, demotivated, you ask?
Because I was asked to create-react-app with nodemailer, it worked well on heroku, YAYYY MEE, "

"NOTHING GOES WRONG IN DEPLOYMENT FUCK YEAH"

Little did I know that was a "demo" for the business people, My superior / manager/boss wants me to deploy on 1and1 service provider,

> Okay 1 and 1 service provider does provide Nodej, so it shouldn't be hard.
> Turns out it is a Windows hosting server IIS 10 without URL Rewrite.
> *INTERNAL SCREAMING*
I went up to him to talk about this issue and requested to let me talk to 1 and 1, and get this sorted

> But bro, if we cannot fix it, I think they also cannot fix, probably.

*INTERNAL SCREAMING AT PEAK*

I just want URL Rewrite installed on IIS10 so that I can move on to the next project.
A little background for this project
> No support from him during development.

> I personally used HD Images, because why not?

> Website seems slow because of HD Images, and now he complains about it.

You fucking (managers) want a website to be scalable and fast and yet you choose to focus on B U S I N E S S instead of support the real guy.

I'm fucking sick and tired, it took me 24 hours figure out the issue because there is nothing on 1 and 1 support/ forum/help center.

Another 24 hours to try and fix, yet no luck.

I'm gonna finally point the domain name to heroku. Fuck, I'm so fucking done

I am sad, I am not getting paid for last month's work as it was some "mis-communication" and my contract was available till August! 2 options

> set opacity of the website in such a manner it partially shows anything
> set the website on fire

So I deleted ~/.config instead of vscode .config ☺️ accidentally....

How's the week so far you ask?

> I got dumped with unacceptable reason, I cannot swallow that reason

> My boss says I haven't been doing good work (I'm fresh off the boat)

> I've been working alone for 3 hours extra, because my team members are on CL (again fresh off the boat)

> I've been stuck on an issue which is already live since a week, because according to seniors I have to do it.

Personally, I've lost interest in everything and I and being nihilist.

that fucking fellow dev who knows nothing about what he's doing yet makes it look like he's doing something critical -_-

Many Happy returns of the day @Alice 🤗🍻

stackexchange is also as similar as stackoverflow

well well well, at least you have the balls to agree

Deployed landing page, now waiting for marketing to complain

Fucking tired of clients sharing projects as .zip on gdrive

And just when I was having a shut eye, my mom woke me up, because WiFi wasn't working..😒

> Half asleep
> No coffee

I hate SOAP API so fucking much that I can't even express in words

Project 1 : learnt e-commerce , demandware, sfcc
Project 2 : learnt reactjs

I fucking hate Facebook cocksuckers... They're the worst I tell you...

And did I mention Facebook pays NGOs to 'advertise' about Facebook as an advertisement platform... Fuckkkk

And I am fucking forced to sit down and clap for these ass kissers, even though I don't have Facebook...

I don't even have an iTunes account 🤣🤣🤣

I was so sleepy the other night, I wrote my email like :

email_primary@email_secondary_domain.com

🙄🙄🙄

scrolling through devRant, instead I should be working on deoplyment on production, but fuck it.

TIL : Learn to deploy before development

So this is what 'It care, engineers' of gov. health insurance replies when they're being notified about deprecated function i.e. window.showModal() is in production

Only aim is to earn enough to drink costliest Scotch every weekend 😍

!dev

Fuck I woke up understanding that it's Monday but it's Sunday, for the first time I was having such a romantic dream, it soothe me soo much, calmed me so much, put me off the problems...

I used to think having is a distraction but after this dream I am proved so wrong which I hate.

It was damn bad idea to break up in the first place

Learned Documentation the hard way.

this is a chrome audit report/lighthouse report of the website of the company for which I work.

!dev

I had semi-jokingly changed my username from dextel2 to nothappy, because of that one bad day.

But, it is now when I realized that I am actually NOT HAPPY, things are lately rough, I am constantly scared for no reason, I doubt my skills, I doubt myself for no reason, and top of that there's always a chance for another epileptic attack.

I tried and keep trying to distract myself from negative thoughts but the more I try the more I fail, I've become distant with my younger brother, for the record I'm very overprotective about him. I don't even know if he feels the same, as this year ends or every day passes by I feel changed from my past self (not in a good way).

Switched my first job to get another good job, turns out they don't even have any projects and I'm just a guy they are showcasing like they have ONE amateur developer and we are looking for an entire project and it did work for one client which I'm gonna deny personally because the client is not clear about the project itself, I do not care about the consequences, my heart lies in academics and I'll put my 100% in academics, shall I'm kicked.

A lot has happened in this year, but this one is/was unique and very hard to process. I've always been joyful, sarcastic, funny, you name it, but all of it has just vanished, don't know why. I'm also becoming distant from my ONLY 3 friends and parents.

First day of job and I get the lucky bsod pc

What a great day already

* Start learning grahpql
* yay it seems easy
* not 2 minutes later get message from professor to write an apology letter for that seminar that I did not attended (inner ultimate rage), and if I don't submit it I won't be allowed for the final semester of my last step of education

* wow claps for your education system and asshole "professors"

* fuck all friends who want to write their apology letter with "excuse".

* AT LEAST GIVE A FUCKING EXCUSE TO WRITE, YOU MORONS

* what graphql? oh yes couldn't continue

* checks messages on WhatsApp *

* Hey could you write me an email regarding a refund I need.

* ¯\_ツ_/¯ ⤜(ʘ_ʘ)⤏

All of this fucking shit storm and still I haven't been able to land upon a topic for the project

Oh wait, but you have to do your project in an industry, and IT HAS TO BE A PROJECT

Ah we don't care if industry allows a fresh intern to do a live project or gives intern resource and company space and invest time and effort in him/her. no we don't.

*WE WANT INDUSTRY PROJECT FROM YOU*

Fuck you YouTube for TV, I can't use the fucking keyboard now... Fucking piece of useless shit...

> be me
> wake up 8:30 am
> sort and view notifications one by one.
> Manager sends text * can you do this? *
> * yes I can *
> goes back to notifications *so where was I? Ah this email.*
> *Please get it done by the end of the day*, another text by the manager.
> I ignore that.
> Manager spams me till I reply
> I hate my life

What's with kids and with js framework(s) ? Like almost every jr student at University is wanking their dicks at it...

It's Friday and I'm thinking of deployment in prod. wish me luck

when you put development in production

!dev

Here here to another year. So it's year end and I'd like to share an insight why I'm not happy.

> Left good job but the pay wasn't so good
> Lost girlfriend, I blame myself for this
> We were on the same project, so naturally my entire project is sabotaged
> She gave away my very first API which I built by myself
> Been unemployed 2 months and did nothing
> Got hired for react js and AngularJS but boss wants me to do java backend
> I DONT EVEN KNOW JAVA, IT ISNT ON MY RESUME
> And I might not get gold 🏅 medal for the academics

2 years from now I'll switch from industry to academics, I want to shape young minds properly

> be me
> "let's have a look to my previous PHP projects"
> fire up xampp
> services up and running
> enters localhost:1111
> ERR_SERVER_NOT_FOUND
> bullshit, I know that port number is right
> tried all other solutions
> finally saw the config just to find out the port is 1337
> well fuck me in the ass
> pic related

So after updating Android studio , I was trying to update SDK and got this message

Watching 3 seasons of Sherlock and Rick and Morty

I feel so stupid right now!!!

I don't fucking care if you don't understand what I'm trying to convey, I've documented how to configure email with your fucking iPhone (even though I don't own one), I will not fucking guide some FUCKING idiot from management to teach them configure the same documented thing.

It's fucking email, you log in with your credentials and settings are fetched, how is this difficult to understand you FUCKING idiot?!?!??

Also, pic related, translation "I don't give rat's ass" or "I don't fucking care"

I never understood or will understand my mother or positive energy that resides in her, so I'm going through a little tough time here, broke and unemployed and she just challenged me to shave off my 'stach and beard and something good will happen in my life, so I did just to prove her wrong

read this somewhere on the internet

e=(mc)²

error = (more code)²

guess it's true

So I was reading Julia lang's documentation and got mildly triggered due to this, but then they are not web designing project so I guess it's okay

*Stack Overflow* : Only 1 question to unlock the Curious badge.
*Also StackOverflow*

It's just a piece of paper which tells that I know something.

switched from GitHub to GitLab, because unlimited private repositories

It literally haunts me that I've used jQuery in a reactjs project, I'm not saying that jQuery is bad but using it does not seems right, I can't sleep, always thinking about a solution, fml

I aim to be web designer...

a little backstory, I've always been ignorant towards how much effort it takes to design one responsive website without frameworks or libraries and now that I know it's not a child's play (at least not for me), I aim to be one, I mean I look some websites' media query rules and they go down till smart watches now a days

I'll instantly ++ when I read the whole rant, without opening it..

Need an opinion for a tattoo I'm about to get

How's

root@dextel2:~$
#/bin/sh

?

Poll:

Besides devRant, reddit or 4chan? Why?

So I guess, I'm a technical recruiter, part of the screening process, now, for Java applicants. Yay or Nay? I'm not sure if I should be happy or not, because I hate Java and Oracle

+ Extinction of Java
+ More frameworks for JavaScript
+ Extinction of Vue (Please)

today I wrote fine jQuery code. feels good man

*coffee time 5 issues*
*While solving issues 4 more issues*
*Total 11 new issues while leaving office*

Do testers realise the gravity of time?

😂😂 source r/programmerhumor

Yeah, I just love linux

I saw a feed long before which described how to generate an image like this, Does anyone know how to do this?

> unemployed (took a break)
> not gonna go back to the old company
> applied to another job, awaiting a response
> canceled Netflix
> Meanwhile doing small projects for myself, teaching like PWA and Web Notification API, focusing on javascript
> doing small time work (providing WordPress websites), not really proud of it, but only that works here for a small time

PM: have a look on this website and let me know if we can do this?
Me: Umm...the product is unfinished and it is built upon WordPress so it can be done...
PM:...
Me: Send credentials so that and requirements...
PM: 'Need to finish the website and fix errors'
Me : [that's really vague but okay] Okayyyyyyyy
Me: Send credentials
Me: Moral of the story is, do not approach me if you do not have complete details...please fuck off...
PM : we don't have it

Some one is testing in production... Shall I report this ? (I'm student btw)

Today I've landed on a legacy project which still uses mail() method in PHP. Just gonna enjoy this one.

414 rants since your last visit,

Alright devrant, here we go.

> client adds a home button to the subdomain
> asks to add a feature from which user can come to the homepage of subdomain
> naturally, add "/" in the href of the home
> client gets frenzy
> "that home button was supposed to redirect users to the main domain"
> I'm like wtf bro
> anyways adds another home button to redirect to the home of the subdomain.

now let's see how confused the users get

The new devrant website is simply amazing, I feel like not leaving it...

How greedy can you get?

> boss takes half assed gdpr project : branch xyz
> branch xyz requires deprecated version of npm/node
> I re-install node this time with deprecated version
> Wow this node is configured with ant build
> ECMA 5, config but code is shit as fuck
> still I get the job done , cannot test it because code is shit as fuck and I will never any thing to fix that un healthy code
> code doesn't run on client side,
> no shit Sherlock
> get a call from boss, it urget look in it and fix it

I'm the guy who downvotes and flags your questions on Stack overflow, for being in poor format and incomplete background of question.

P.S. I'm not hot head.

> be me
> watching FRIENDS
> lurking internet
> get a message from the manager, "we need to deliver WordPress + woocommerce + cost calculator theme to the client".
> "but I'm, not a WordPress developer"
> ??
> "okay, I'll just find a theme for it on ThemeForest"
> *sends theme as per description*
> *reverts back with HTML5 template* "see if we can use this"
> to be honest, that template was not even close as per requirement.
> *sends another themes back and forth*
> ???
tl;dr : she finalized the theme I intially sent after half of the day

shall i just kill my self slowly with fire?

I should've read about installing ubuntu, now I'm facing grub-efi-amd4-signed GRUB Installation failed error

I'm quite shocked today after receiving an email which acknowledges me with so much respect that I cannot handle, I mean this has never happened in my entire life, I can't even handle it

Fucking seizures, make up your mind!!

Does having a good rank on Stack Overflow reflects positiveness on your Resume? Share your experience(s).

only if git commit --amend worked in real life

normie uncultured dev : *Ctrl + S*
me being cultured dev : *:w*

what a terrible fucking day

!dev

TL: DR - This year is not good so far.

One important thing that I learned this year is you understand a certain person's importance after they are no more.

My grandfather, whom I've always hated, ignored, made my distance from him, just because he was unfair with me and my mother since my childhood, passed away a few days before. Only then I realized what kind of a fucking idiot I am.

On top of that, 2 of my best friends stop being friends with me, for one I had gone too far with a practical joke and for another, I proposed her.

But 2 months from now I expect things to be left behind, locked away in a closet, and throw away the key.

So, I'll just say this, that acknowledge person while they are here, don't hold any grudge towards any fucking one.

> be me
> complete tickets overnight
> submit for review
> takes 2 days to review
> still no word
> more tickets raised with incomplete information
> ???
> profit

In the new job as "Consultant", one of my duties is to maintain the website. Now, the website is based on PHP 5.6 (which they are still using mail method) and without git or sg-git and of course, it is based on cPanel.

Now, I update the website in real time i.e. working on cPanel itself. This is because I don't do for the front end, I do it for SEO. So one day, they reported a "feature" as a bug and assigned it to solve me, I took my time solved it, they did not like it, I reverted it back and I had to listen to a lecture because I did not test it.

Imagine old "wise" ass hats giving a lecture which they do not know about in the first place, 12 of them precisely, yeah that's what happened to me.

None yet....

dev vs QA rant (n + 1)

So our QA is done by China team so naturally time difference is quite irritating,

I cannot change code
I cannot debug for issue

So today I fix a critical issue and before pushing it my seniors send the to the QA
> QA unavailable
> I wait for QA because nobody notifies if the code is tested and I can work ahead
> I get review that my issue fix generated another issue (page gets redirected)
> I'm angry and astonished, I check on same link, same circumstances and no such issue is found
> My seniors say read the issue properly and I do it, no positive response when I contradict the QA
> QA leaves for home on Friday and critical issue still remains in live

I cannot believe the laziness of QA, I mean it's their loss at the end of the day.

> top of that I waited 2 hours for QA to check the issue

I fucking hate myself for having this bug in the first place, I thought I had it solved, committed and pushed to git but still, it persists.

I'm trying to check if the value I'm inserting into the database exists or not, this is my useless fucking way to do it...

What the actual FUCK.

I'm in my own existential pain trying to solve this shit and it's still not working

SEND HELP PLEASE

Monday Motivation for Web Developers.

document.getElementsByTagName('html')[0].style.display = "none";

So CRA(create-react-app) v2 rolled out.

> started new project with my own boilerplate
> little did I know, I am accidentally doing int CRA2
> gulp-sass fails.
> Internal screaming.
> Bulma React Components fails to compile due to one type, IDK how they missed in previous build.
> fixed by removind browserlist array from package.json
> Guess what, it comes back as you close it.
> So, now I've to keep it open while gulp-sass is running, which is almost always, in order to compile.

Thank you and Fuck you facebook

Hello, folks, I'm starting to learn Android Studio and for the same, I've attended this workshop held at University which was not very helpful in certain aspects. The guy/mentor assumed that we all knew what is Firebase and started dropping knowledge bombs about firebase and integration with Android Studio(Apps).

So, coming to the fundamental question i.e. I'm reading SO 'Documentation' which is still in beta, I find it useful, as it is scratching the basic surface. What are other sources to learn about Android, of course, sources which are not deprecated?

fuck you office365, almost all fucking services. It is so fucking slow, takes ages to open 1 fucking email with only attachments. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!!

So, how do reactjs developers send a contact form email? I've searched almost 3 pages of Google results and cannot find anything useful.

So, this is a story of me leaving my current job. I am in a maintenance PHP project. I usually love PHP but I hate the way this project is done, therefore I hate this project

Now, see the attitude change in people when they come to know I will no longer be there:

> 7:49 AM : *gets a mail without context with some photographs*
> 9:00 AM : *I leave for my doctor's visit which is once in 3 months*
> 10:00 AM: I see, still no email with context, well, I'll go back to sleep
> 12:00 PM: I see, *gets an email from the manager*, so you want this news to be updated with these new images

At this point, I deliberately postponed the task, because I am salty because you are sending images with no context.

> 3:00 PM: Okay, this is done. *send e-mail, WhatsApp, and hangout to the manager that task is done*

> 3:08 PM: Post a rant on devRant!

So another infamous code (or smart code) you decide, there's class 'error' in the template/html and here this genius is removing it and adding it back? is this even logical at any level,

I mean just hide() and show() would do the job

Literally redirect domain name to heroku app.

Yeah because your every fucking app needs my call records

My family thinks me as
- the guy who fixes computers
- the guy who fixed mobile devices
- the guy who knows (must know) about mobile phones (which I personally can care less)

> be me
> change theme in vscode
> syntax highlighter stops working for php
> panic mode
> removed personal settings for php
> removed all settings
> back on default
> ohshitno.xml
> find a github issue, marked as closed
> sleep
> wake up
> start working
> cannot work without syntax highlight
> find another github issue, saying the theme I want doesn't supports syntax highlighting
> fml.xml
> back on default

When I say I'm a developer, it means that, in simpleton language, that I don't do your backups, I don't "repair" you PC because you're a baffon and I certainly do not edit company's logo which is in .png format deliver it in .cdr file and expect it as, as good and perfect as original, So fuck you, you impatient , imbecile , pompous prick I've ever met

> "Yeah take as much time as you want, but do it quickly"

I mean what the fuck does that even mean, if you want it done quickly then say so, be a man and face it and don't hide behind the excuse of "take as much time as you want"

Fucking idiots, little do they know when I'm in the zone I need time to think before act so I don't get blamed for "un-satisfied" product in the future.

So I've decided to leave loopholes in the current project I've been working on, deliver it, and leave the company and make their lives living hell, I know this is beneath anyone's standards but I have to do this to teach them how to treat a person properly,FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK,

This is going to be fun

Clients are total assholes, we all know it, just sharing my another depressed instance.

> be me, freelancing.
> client sends in an image of a webpage
> le me gently ask "What is the functionality here since this has a form?"
> Client explains
> OK let's do this because I have other stuff to do as well.
> Sends in demo
> Client: "Numerous typos, send again"
> Okay, sends again.
> Client Rages: "This still has typos. I thought you were a good developer. You look like a has-been.

I promptly quit the project and tried to explain to him the difference between a "demo" and a finished project. He was supposed to check the functionality of the fucking form, which he didn't.

Got a call to finish the project, him explaining nobody is working for him for given budget, he can't afford anybody in this town (literally), and I am not going back.

> be me
> recruiter: *sends a LinkedIn request with a message, I saw your profile, you're quite proficient in javascript and jQuery, do you want to work with us with cutting edge meteorjs stack*
> me : *the fuck ?! I don't even know that library exists, replies anyway for a call*
> me:...okay I'll call before I come in
> me: *quick look on their website which is built on meteorjs, fucking beautiful*
> me: *opens console out of curosity*
> me: holy shit, what the fuck? they're loading jQuery 1.1.2 over HTTP and website is on HTTPS, top of that they are loading jQuery libraries before jQuery.
> me : *reports to the recruiter*
> recruiter: thanks, we'll look into it
> ???
> profit

and I don't plan to work a place like that

You come to me to seek help to clean your mess **YOU** did to someone and If I fix it, it's you who fixed it or else I'm your fallback guy, *claps*

You fucking moron, I was your fallback guy ever since we met, I treat you as a friend, ask to meet unconditionally and all you've ever done to me is to fix Windows installation. FUCK YOU MAN

Plesk Onyx is the fucking useless piece of shit!

I feel like crying because I couldn't configure ERPNext on windows (Virtual Box). Damn thing showed this error "Already Registered, There were problems" and redirect me to homepage.

Hate this when there are no error codes or no proper documentation.

Tried every possible solution in past 4~5 hours. I'll sleep

var_dump() or print_r()?

Windows being windows

So, I made this API which logins to the system and Used it in an android app, there was one roadblock to it, that everytime user enters a password, it has to match the password hash so I, excitingly, used password_verify($password,$passwordHash), unknowingly that it is fucking unsafe and the code is still there, and here's where it gets interesting it is not over SSL/TLS. Fuck me, any bright solutions?

"I think.."

It doesn't matter what you think you fucking moron. The bottom line here is that you forgot to add a master table for this and you are asking to create a master table from me when I have no fucking records, YOU THINK you need it today but deep down you too know that is fucking impossible to do.

"Only some code modification"
No shit Sherlock, yes indeed only some code modification is required, and I did, the only problem is that you are not having that required field's data.

fuck you, you fat useless piece of shit

A)
const gulp = require("gulp"),
sass = require("gulp-sass");
OR

B)
const gulp = require("gulp"),
const sass = require("gulp-sass");

I use A

Just before deploying this to prod found this bug... discover this bug with bunch of print statements

Lately I take work literally seriously, not due to motivation but due to fear, more on that later, but this is what I think about lately while I'm working

> that line of code should fix it
> oh shit I should've checked logs
> let me check logs
> let me put 10 breakpoints in code and javascript in chrome
> why is this bug not reproducing?
> why I have to work on someone else's spaghetti code?
> this loop iterates over all customers' data I'll just step over it, Oh fuck I resumed

etc etc

I'm feared because where I live, isn't a good place for software developers as there aren't companies which hire, those who hire need ninja developers who complete 1 JIRA Sprint/Phase in 1 day, Here I feel safe as there are people to correct me plus coffee machine