Resigning tomorrow, and I can't sleep. Thrilled to finally end the slavery at a company that pays me half of the market price. Exciting day coming up..

Sitting at home debugging code for the fun of it when... "I would debug 500 bugs, and I would debug 500 more. Just to be the man who debugged a thousand bugs to fall asleep on the floor."

me deleting print statements after debugging my code

A tcp packet walks in to a bar and says “I want a beer”, barman says “you want a beer?” and tcp packet says “yes, a beer” .

In high society, TCP is more welcome than UDP. At least it knows a proper handshake.

A bunch of TCP packets go into a bar, until it’s overcrowded. The next day, half as many go in.

A bunch of TCP packets walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Hang on just a second, I need to close the window.”

When I try to send SYNs to chicks, I don’t get any ACKs. Just FINs and RSTs.

IP packet with TTL=1 arrives at bar. Bartender: “Sorry, can’t let you leave…and you don’t get any beer either…” 

The worst part about token ring jokes is that if someone starts telling one while you are telling yours, all joking stops.

The great thing about TCP jokes is that you always get them.

The problem with TCP jokes is that people keep retelling them slower until you get them.

I would tell some UDP jokes too but I never know if anyone gets them

The best thing about UDP jokes is that I don’t care if you get them or not.

I had a funny UDP joke to tell, but I lost it somewhere...

The sad thing about IPv6 jokes is that almost no one understands them and no one is using them yet.

I tried to come up with an IPv4 joke, but the good ones were all already exhausted.

A DHCP packet walks into a bar and asks for a beer. Bartender says: “here, but I’ll need that back in an hour!

DHCP jokes only work when there is only one person telling them

The worst part of SSH jokes is that, even when they're not funny, you suck it up and just pretend they were anyway.

The problem with token ring jokes is you need to wait your turn to laugh

I’d make a joke about UDP, but I don’t know if anyone’s actually listening…

Petition to officially rename the term 'build' to 'kraken', so QA can shout 'Release the Kraken' and I can shout back 'The Kraken has been released!'.

Uhm I was going to search for mutliple subdomains but uhm yeah...

Hello fellow devRanters.
It's that time of year where we celebrate the holidays, and give thanks to each other.

This year has been a tough one. And for many people, life can be snide and harsh; the fact that such a community like this exists is a testament to that. But despite all this we continue to uplift each other through our hardships.

As a way of thanks for such a great community I'd like to give away a few Devie balls (:/ ) to some people.

I'll pick a few people at random, at around this time tomorrow, in the comment sections that would like to have a little devie ball.

In order to partake in this, I'd like you to tell me one thing about technology that you're most thankful for.

Boss: Logo needs to be more grey. Touch it up in photoshop.

Me: .logo {opacity: 0.6;}

Boss: perfect!

Every time I type "pubic" instead of "public"

When you try to rob a programmer

When you press CTRL C instead of CTRL V and lose the line you just copied