Guy called in:

Guy: hello, i can't seem to login to the sql database, could you check if the ip whitelist went right? It's on the *names server* server.
Me: *checks if guy is calling from an authorized number* - nope.
Me: I'm sorry but you're not calling from an authorized number so I can't check that for you!
Guy: no you don't understand. I don't want any of this not-authorized bullshit, I just want a solution for this right now.
Me: and I just want you to call from an authorized number.

Yeah, I actually said that. He wasn't very happy 😅

I'm still employed by the way 🤣

Client : Can you make some adblock?
Me : Why? There is a lot of good things already...
C : I mean... Listen carefully.
M : ok
C: i have some google ads and user blocks with adblock
M : yeah, that is normal
C : so i implemented adblock blocker which blocks adblock so that i can show the webpage plus ads when the user disables adblock.
M : i bet users hate that.
C : yeah, so users found out a way to disable adblock blocker which disables adblock blocker which i implemented to show the ads! So i cant earn revenue..
M : so what?
C : Can you make ad block block block block?
M : Sure. How much will you give me ?
C : 20 to 30 dollars
M : great ( the most generous client ever seen)

*couple of years later*

Client : can you make ad block block block block block block block block block block?
Me : i cant understand
C : count the number of block
If there is odd number of block i means to block ads.
If there is even number of block ads, it means to show ads making user to disable ads.
M : so just tldr your request this time
C : even number
M : ok how much will you pay
C : 20 to 30 dollars

*next day*
C : can you..
M : offline

Who in the fucking world made ads, made adblock and made adblock block?

"Age is just a number"
No, "Age" is clearly a string.

It's good that they clarify that baby food is not a number. Just in case you were wondering.

this isn't even a tech thing. it just fucking bamboozled me. I overheard a conversation today.

> "duuuude you gotta make a better password that shit is insecure af"

> "bruh i did, i googled it"

> "googled what?"

> "how to make a good password"

> "so how longs your password?"

> "not long, it's bob2"

> "where's your capital?"

> "I made the '2' capital"

> "so you capitalized a number…"

thank god he walked away. he even told him his fucking password. ignorance.

My CS professor just told my class of 200 people that 1 is a prime number.

You can practically hear centuries of mathematicians rolling over in their graves

Friend(non dev): Hey. Do you know how much it costs to maintain an app?

Me : Well that depends. What are you planning to do?

Friend: Something like Trivago. But small.

Me: That still doesn't tell me anything

Friend: Come on. Just give a number. How hard can it be?

Me: 42. *facepalm*

Friend: See wasn't that hard. Was it?

Me: *thinking* Don't correct him. Just let him be.

My sister lending me her credit card to buy something online.

S: "But don't store the number!"
me: "I would never."
S: "I know you can hack it, please don't!!"
me: "Haha okay.."
*cries inside... just because I make websites and 3D design*
me: "Thanks a lot, sis <3"

I love how "minimal" devRant is.

No username, no time... just the number of likes and number of comments ..

*it's a feature not a bug*
✌(◕‿-)✌

When I was in 7th grade, my neighbor (a DoD programmer) challenged me to write a sorting algorithm for a hypothetical super limited environment (he said a satellite). It didn’t have any built-in sorting methods, had very limited memory, slow processor, etc. so I needed to be clever about it.

It took me a few nights before i found a solution he liked. The method I came up with counted the number of occurrences of each number in the array and put them in the appropriate spots in a new array. This way it only required O(2n) running time and 2n memory.

I just learned today that this is called the “counting sort” 😄

I’m proud of little 11 year old me.

The first time I decided to hack around a bit:D

One of my teachers made a quiz software, which is only used by him(his lectures are about databases), and it is highly unsecure. When I heard that it is written in C# I decided to look in it's source code. The biggest problem I ran into: this program is only available on the computers in his classroom, and he monitors the computers display. However, I successfully put it into my pendrive without getting caught.

So when I got home, I just had to use a .NET decompiler(in this case: dotPeek) to get the fully functional source code. The basic function of the program was to download a quiz from his database server, and when it was finished, grade it client-side. Than, I realized how bad it was: It contains the number of questions, the number of correct and incorrect answers.
I've just made a modified .exe, which contained really little modification(like correctAnswers=maxQuestions, incorrectAnswers=0). Everything looks the same, you just have to click over it, and everytime it will return with 100%.

And the bonus: The program connects to the database as a user with root access, and without password. I was able to log in, download(dropping was available too, but didn't try) databases(with all the answers) and so on.

Never had to use it though, it was just a sort-of experience gaining.:)

My company does estimates in two ways.

1. Sales person just throws a number out there, always short, and we panic code to make it happen before the client decides twice as long isn't worth it.

OR

2. The devs are told to give an estimate before having a chance to find out all the requirements, THEN ARE TOLD THEY ESTIMATED TOO HIGH AND TO LOWER THE NUMBER!

FUCK THE ESTIMATING!!! GIVE US TIME AND ACCEPT OUR ESTIMATES!! SALES PEOPLE DONT HAVE TO STAY UP IF WE NEED TO CRAM!!

Seriously now:

Our boss just asked our manager to log in github and do a daily report of the number of lines we write every day.

....

We had the most fucking retarded client today. No, seriously, if you ever beat their level you have a serious mental issue.

They had a mail problem for which they'd need to check at the side of another company since we don't have those fucking logs.

Their statements:
- they entered an email address In the text field of mail-tester.com and were furious that they didn't get the results sent.
Note: it says right on that page that YOU JUST NEED TO SEND THE EMAIL ADDRESS WHICH IS PRE-ENTRRED IN THAT TEXT FIELD AN EMAIL.
- their company has been a reputable 'conservative' company which hasn't done anything wrong since 19xx so the fact that they'd end up on a blacklist was FUCKING OUTRAGEOUS and bullshit.
- our support wasn't willing to help and only willing to tell them outrageous lies.
- the other it company was only reachable at a premium number and thus expensive to call.

Emails back and forth and finally they CC'd the other company. They're reply was fucking priceless:

"we never had a premium number. Feel free to call us on *number* any time during the week between *time* and *time*.

Then he told us that we should just go back to sleep.

It was way worse than that but due to privacy and my own memory this is all I can tell.

Just wow.

My father just told me that I'm not a good programmer, because there are kids out there, who are younger than me and know more programming languages.

Besides the fact that the number of programming languages one knows has nothing to do with programming skills, I just said: "I wanna see that kid.", because I already knew his answer.

"Well, I never said there are many of these kids."

*facepalm*

DM'ed a girl on reddit who posted a humorous comment on a post that interests me.

Got to know she's in the same profession as mine.

Few messages later...

Me: How much do you like working as a data scientist in your company ?
(asked her because it is kind of my dream company)

She: You can't really put a number to it. It has many aspects.

Me: How about a vector ?

Waiting for a reply since 3 days.

Do you guys get the joke or was it just me? She claimed to be a data scientist, it's not my fault 😣

My first hack... Back at the days when phones had disks to dial a number. I was a kid of cause, I'm not that old. I used to like to call my grans. Once, when I supposed to go to sleep already, I've found out that there is phone socket in my room (the one connected to the copper wire, that is where the word "phone line" came from).
It took me about a half of an hour to detach handset from the toy phone and about two ours to reverse engineer dialing protocol (you just need to disconnect the line sequentially corresponding number if times).
And after that I've heard my granny's voice. I was literally overwhelmed that it worked.

Hello World!
I'm a bot made by @xzvf.
My goal is to find all active users on devRant and
collect analytics based on it.
By analytics I just mean things like:
- Total number of users.
- Number of users with x ++ or more
- Number of rants posted in a certain timeframe
- Number of users active in the last day/month/year

THIS BOT WILL NOT TRACK INDIVIDUAL USERS!
Also, it will not ++/-- anything automaticly as that is definitely against the rules.

-@xzvf

Nose picking manager.
I mean this fucker picks his nose even when he’s talking face to face,
And am not talking about just cleaning it,am talking about putting the finger in all the way and probably trying to dial a number...

Normally when someone calls in and I pick up, they either don't call from an authorized number and get mad when we I don't give information, ask for advice and then say that it isn't logical and ask for a different answer or are just stubborn as a motherfucker.

Then I suddenly get a call from someone who I can verify easily, listens carefully to my answers and thanks me in the end.

Where can I get more of those clients?!

In a programming contest, I forgot how to round numbers in Java, an I needed a 3 number rounding, so I multiplied the number by 1000, then sum 0.5 and convert it to integer so the decimal part would be gone, finally, just print the number except the 3 last digits as a string, put a period and print the other 3 digits.
I must say I'm not proud of that.

I really like JS, but sometimes it's just incredibly stupid.
NaN stands for Not-A-Number

typeof NaN
> 'number'

why are you doing this to me

This is just fucking awesome.
Bought a domain name from a local registrar today and now my personal details like full name, phone number and exact address are nicely on whois.

The cunts didn't even thing to ask me during registration if I want to make it private and there's no option to do that on their piss poor website.

Oh well, tomorrow will be the day that I transfer my new domain away from them. Last time I ever do business with these shitcakes

Arglebargle.

I went to buy flowers for [redacted event] and gave the florist my CC info, number, and email for a receipt. He was a nice old man who loves what he does, and makes beautiful arrangements. But. He just emailed me all of my CC info, and asked what part of it was wrong. Twice. Emailed. Plain text. SMTP.

Guess who's requesting a replacement card?

😞

Google puts it's foot down, "age is not just a number"

- WE NEED TO KNOW THE VERSION OF THE SYSTEM THIS INSTANT!
"what? version? wtf are you talking about"
- THE CLIENT HAS I.T. GUIDELINES TO STRICT CONTROL THE VERSION OF EACH SOFTWARE VENDOR'S SYSTEMS!
"We are not a 'software vendor', we provide them consulting on logistics!"
- THEY USE OUR WEBSITE! THIS MAKES US A SOFTWARE VENDOR!
"Wouldn't that make 'google' their vendor too?"
- IM SURE THEY STRICTLY CONTROL GOOGLE'S VERSION TOO!
"I'm pretty sure they don't. But, whatever, that do answers the question of what they want. Some paperwork jockey wants a meaningless number to fill a form, let's give'em one"

I just had someone make an API endpoint where they can ask "the version", and it is just the number of commits in our production branch. For lols, we even 0-fill and split every three magnitude orders with a dot, so we're in version 0.012.345 or something.
Major version upgrade every million commits!

Fuck those guideline-parrots who are unaware that words sometimes have meaning, and sometimes not.

BRAIN_UNCAUGHT_EXCEPTION
Could not execute "sleep()", as main thread was busy thinking about why a beautiful girl would just handle me her number.

Ok we did get on well but it was unexpected nevertheless

Thank you brain for wasting my day 👍

A random number generator in my code just gave "0000". I even thought that could be some bug and was investigating. How cool is that?

Okay, question;

Can I use ANY phone number in my game?

According to Wikipidia:
"Numbers between (555)-0100 & (555)-0199 are reserved for fictional use."
But.. I'm wanting to have a little phone pop up in my game that you can enter phone numbers into and text the corresponding player (and i hope to have more than 99 players) I would just have contact names, but I want players ti be able to dick around with other players.. Like, post their number to in-game telemarketers and such. What fo you think I should do?

I just realised “CSS stylesheets” is basically the same as “LCD display” or “PIN number”.

Although I've heard “LC display” a few times I've never come across something similar for different acronyms. Maybe I'll start saying “CS sheets” or “C stylesheets” 😈

That moment you realise why you enjoy the dev life again.

It's been a long time since I've had a solid day of coding, just coding..., no meetings, no wild requests, no crazy issues, no data fixing because someone can't type a number correctly, just me, myself and that keyboard going on a field trip of quality coding time again.

Ah, it's a good day to end the week on!

When you have to spend two days inventing math formulas for work because google won't tell you how to sort every possible combination of an array of arrays into a zero based number list, or how to get a combination from just it's index.

The company got a new office just in time for the "company summit".

I checked out the address on Google maps. It's a cinderblock building with the number spraypainted on the side, a battered cyclone fence in front, a cyclone gate off to the right side (apparently falling off) leading to a random battered shed, and immediately on the left is a dental office with bars on the windows. Also, the fence has spikes on top.

I'm terrified.

This is more of a rant about myself and what a prick I am. Last week I left my brand new Kindle at a hotel, just forgot about it because my brain is mush.

I don't even bother calling the hotel for days thinking and knowing full well the staff would have taken it (this stupid thing is worth a week's worth of wages here). I decide to call anyway and ask. "Yes sir, Mr. Matt, your Kindle is safe and sound in our hotel's main safe in a soft case awaiting your pickup or we will be happy to courier it to you".

I drove back to Varna and the super nice hotel guy apologized he didn't have my number otherwise he would have called (I don't have a phone number in BG).

I hate being the cynical asshole-dick I've always been.

Fuck.

I'm getting drunk now.

During my first-ever technical interview, the interviewer asked me "Do you know the FizzBuzz problem?"
"Uhh, not really." (I was just thinking ok this problem has a name, must be some algorithm problem)
"So the problem is basically to give you the numbers 1 to 100, if the number is divisible by 3, print 'Fizz', if divisible by 5, print 'Buzz', if divisible by 3 and 5, print 'FizzBuzz'. For other numbers just print out the number itself."

After hearing the problem, I felt so many ideas popping out of my stressed brain.

I thought for a bit and said "ok, so if the digit sum of a number is a multiple of 3, then the number is divisible by 3, and if the last digit is either 0 or 5, it's divisible by 5."
Then I started to code out my solution until the interviewer said "there's an easier solution. Can you think of it?"

This stressed me out even more.

I thought for a bit and said "well, starting from 3, keep a counter that records how many iterations are done after 3. When the counter hits 3, that number would be divisible by 3 for sure. Should I try this solution?"
The interviewer said "Sure." So I started again.

However, I struggled for about another 3min until I realized this solution is a lot harder to implement. The interviewer probably saw my struggle too.

This was the point where he stepped in and asked me "Ummmm there's an easy way of solving this. Have you heard of the MODULO OPERATOR?"

In sheer embarrassment, I finished the code in 30s.

Of course, there was no further question after this, and I felt the need to seriously reevaluate my intelligence afterwards.

I see a trend here.

Posts of people with good number of ++’s get more ++’s than the posts of people with less number of ++’s. Even if the post of person with good number of ++’ is just a normal conversation starter and post of person with less number of ++’s is an actual good fucking rant.

It’s not a bad thing, per se. I hope nobody gets offended. All in good spirit.

To people with good number of ++’s:
Let’s not hold back and ++ the good content of people with less number of ++’s.

To people with less number of ++’s:
Don’t hold back your thoughts. Be free. Write free. Don’t try to make your rant to look a certain way to get more ++’s. We are all here to support.

Let’s grow together and spread positivity.

Peace.

In my CS class I turned in some assignments recently. Two of them were extremely similar: one was to test if a number was even or odd, the other to test if the length of a string was even or odd. I completed the first one and then started to work on the second one and decide to just call the isEven method from the previous lab so I can follow DRY (Dont repeat yourself) and not have to write the same code again. I turned it in and she took off points for it. -.-

!rant

Yesterday I got a pretty straight-forward task of fixing SASS linting errors from our project. I thought, "How many errors could there be?" Turns out there were just around 2000 errors across 109 files!

I was almost like, "Man, this is going to take a lot of my time!"

So, I started fixing the errors one-by-one with my headphones on and switching music genres after every 2 hours.

After almost 6 hours of continuous bug-fixing, my mind kind of became repellant to the possibility of the outer world and my fingers automatically fell on the right keys in almost no time. My brain was functioning like a computer itself.

And after the end of 7 hours, I reduced the number to less than 1000 errors.

Today, I continued the task and found out that there were some scoping errors I made yesterday (web developers would know this pain of '&').

And after working for almost 6 hours today, I got the number down to 500.

Not a rant, but I felt extremely content with what I did today.

I guess every day is not just about programming, sometimes, it's also about making your code better.

Thanks for reading! :)

Anyone watched 'Jhonny English Strikes Again'? This is the code that drives the exoskeleton... I guess it just needs a random number to work. 😂😂

I have noticed on here, there is a direct correlation between the number of swear words in a post and that posts ++ count. As a programmer who doesn't swear (I know, "just give it a few years" or "YOUR NOT A REAL PROGRAMMER!!" [side note, I also don't drink coffee]), I guess my ++ counter will only ever be allocated 1 byte...

My first ever interview for a developer position involved waking up around 9am to a call from an unrecognized number.

I answered and realized it was someone from a startup I applied to just a day before.

Instant phone interview with tech questions on React and Angular, and I BS'd my way through it, knowing almost nothing about either. Got the job, somehow.

When the impostor syndrome hits me, I try to remember my achievements :
- I won a national coding contest when I was 18,
- I made and still maintain a complex app for 15 years, still actively used,
- I cannot count the number of languages I know; too many of them...

Not bragging here, btw. It's just important to actually enumerate your achievements.
If you get hit by the IS, just remember what you did 😉.

So my room mate received an email from a recruiter today:

Hey XXX,

We have not given up yet. We know you are a busy person so we thought of a very time-saving number system. Just send us the number that fits.

1) I am interested, tell me more.
2) Offer sounds interesting but I still don't have time, message me again in 6 months.
3) Thanks for the offer but XXX is still not a city I am interested in.
4) Not interested, thanks for the offer.

1,2 or 3? I am looking forward to your number ;)
(They actually included the wink emoji)

Regards,
Recruiter XXX

We usually don't read these recruiter emails but this one was actually funny :D

I feel bad when I commit too often, especially for little stuff. I'm afraid people will think I just do it to get a higher number of commits :/

Skipped my lectures at university just to get my new Dell laptop at home.

Here is my experience of dell account portal:

There is a 50-50 chance that your order will appear in the list of orders. It has it's own mind, sometimes it will appear, sometimes it will say it has found no orders.

Now if somehow you do see the order in the list, there is a 50-50 chance that clicking on the order number will actually show you the correct order. Most of the time it will take you to a completely different order, where you can see the name, address and other personal details of a person that you don't know. THANKS DELL!

Now if somehow clicking on the order number takes you to the right order details page, there is a 50-50 chance that there will be no courier information, it will be blank without any information. Sometimes it will show the tracking number, but no courier details.

Right, now let's say that I don't give a fuck about any of these. I stayed home, skipping my lecture, just so that I can get my laptop. They promised me that they will deliver it today and I trust them 🙂

BUT YOU MOTHERFUCKER, not only that they will not deliver it today, they haven't even bothered to give me a call and say that they won't be delivering it today. YOU PIECE OF HORSESHIT, I skipped my fucking lectures for you. Now I have to skip my lectures for another day, just to get my GODDAMN laptop.

FUCK YOU DELL, DIE IN HELL!

Why I hate internet media, because it's full of articles such as:
9 tips to make you lose weight faster
13 ideas on how to improve your sex life
8 ways to make you happy when you are sad
47 funny images that make you laugh
8482929 articles that use a pointless number as a headline starter

I admit that these articles are way more tempting to click than if they did not use that number. On the other hand, the number is just random, it only describes the extent of the article. I so hate it.

A software is just a list of bits or we can say binary digits. Next time you developed an application just think you've just found a big "Magic number"! 🤗

Just found a humongous bug in production. The customer relation number, which should have been unique was shared by ten customers.
So instead of 400,000 relation numbers we only had 40,000 unique numbers.

The system is live for 3 weeks now, and we just fixed it on a friday at 5:30PM

If we had found out a week later every customer would have gotten a plastic card with the wrong number, because the cards will be printed in four days...

Another project with legacy code got just dusted off at work. Shits fucked beyond recognition! We got:
- Rando variable names that mean nothing
- Timers running with a cycle time of 2.5ms if you start them with the multiplier 1.
- An Interrupt routine thats 300 lines long.
- Another interrupt thats starting an ADC conversion and waiting for it to complete before returning.
- For loops that start with one and subtract one from the iterator in the loop
- Every value that would normally be expressed as a regular number is written down in Hex. Eg: if(val==0x05)
- State machine built without writing down which state is which. Its just a number. (In hex obviously!)
- All running on a Microcontroller you cant debug on.
- Using a compiler no one has ever heard of before.
- Weird ass Port manipulations
- 15 different .hex and .elf files with no clue whats in them.
- No version control
- We tried explaining the code to a monkey and it hanged itself.

I don't know why I'm having this conversation so often lately.
Someone: "Hey, did you know that Microsoft said that Windows 10 would be the last version of Windows?"
Me: "Yes."
Someone: "But isn't that ridiculous? It would get old at some point, right?"
Me: "...have you heard of macOS X? It's also »the last version« of macOS. But it has still undergone a lot of changes."
Someone: "Hm... I haven't thought about that."

Seriously, just because a company says something would be the last version of a product, it doesn't mean they don't update it anymore, they just take that version, make it a brand and use a different number for versioning (macOS Mojave 10.14, Windows 10 1809, ...).

Companies really try confusing their users as much as possible, and it seems to work, because the convo mentioned above is just repeating so often at this point that it just has to be intentional confusion.

This is fucking bad. I just stumbled across a database online, unencrypted plain text containing ALL details of thousands of students at my university. Full names, ID number (SSN), student numbers, address, family info, medical aid info, physical fitness reports

What do I do? I was not on any VPN or proxy when I accessed it

!dev

Ffuuuuucckk

This day just sucks.
Got a speeding ticket, went to pay it first thing in the morning. To renew insurance I had to call the bank to update my phone nr for 2FA. In this endless loop of „for this, press 1, for that, press2“ I pressed the wrong number and it invalidated my e-Banking password.
After a while got my number updated, after that called the insurance, after waiting for like 20min got that sorted and wanted to check my bank balance but I couldn’t log in. Now I can’t reset it either because it’s locked.
Need to call then again but needed a break and wanted to cook something but now my FUCKING SINK is clogged.

Have to uninstall half of the kitchen to get to t he pipes..

And it’s only noon.

Did you fucking idiots think that I was gonna tell you to implement async await on the requests and not notice that you IMPLWMENTED GODDAMN SYSTEM-SLEEP YOU DESNE MOTHERFUCKEDS IT NOT TAKES 10X AS LONG AS MY OATCH TO JUST LIMIT THE NUMBER IF HTTP REQUESTS FOR FUCJS SAKE THIS CODE LOONS LIKE A RACCOON FUCKED AN MACBOOK THAT ALSO GOT FUCKED BY A GOAT FROM CHERNOBYL THAT SOMEHOW MUTATED TO A RACCOON GOAT 🐐 MACBOOK 💻 HYBRID ABOMINATION THAT IS NOW CLAWING MY EYES OUT AND GIVING ME RABIESCANCERAIDS

My manager wonders why I don't respond to people in a timely fashion.

I'm watching 83 Slack channels and private messages, I get 45 emails an hour, I'm on-call, and I have 125 servers to monitor.

Number of Jira tickets I received in the last 3 days? One single fucking ticket.

Open a damn ticket and I'll shove you to the bottom of the backlog, just like everybody else... I mean, I'll be able to track your request and not loose it.

The number of people who responded to this with bile such as “yeah but how well” or “i bet she can only write hello world”.
Its sad that this attitude still exists in our industry. If you havent seen the story she responded by clarifying that she is on the iOS tutorial team for Raywenderlich, and has a bachelors degree with a double major in Computer Science. But she shouldnt have to explain that just because shes a woman. Are people that insecure about their knowledge that they need to resort to demeaning other peoples? for shame.

I am the sole frontend developer in my project. I have only 6 months of professional coding experience. Just got a call from a person who used to lead me (she is still my lead, technically, but not very much involved in the dev process (management’s decision, not hers)).

She said that a concern has been raised that there have been large number of frontend issues which they (she didn’t specify, I am guessing management) haven’t seen before.

What do you think is the “large number”? Let me tell you. It’s 4.

2 of which are minor CSS issues that couldn’t have been anticipated while coding. They are runtime issues.

One of the 4 is a both frontend and backend issue.

And the last one is a fucking change request!

1 player, many responsibilities, slight issues, RAISE CONCERN - That’s management for you.

Fuck them, I guess.

On top of that, a concern I raised in front of the management regarding the management is not so much of a priority for them. I have a feeling that the concern they raised is just them being a jerk because I raised a concern in the first place.

Fuck them, again!

And again!

I just had my cell phone cloned yesterday. End of the day, my phone lost signal suddenly. I thought it was a problem with my chip, so I decided to check that on a store and buy a new one next day.

Today, after I recover my chip and number, I started to see the mess. Someone used my number to send message to all my contacts on whatsapp, asking for money. Also, I had some contact info changed on the bank broker, which is really serious. I do not know what else is compromised, and I'm truly worried about it.

Someone has some good tips for improving security while using cellphones?

Playing around with Bard:
Me:Who called me from ...?
Bard: <blah blah blah> Would you like me to run a reverse phone lookup on that number for you?
Me: Yes
Bard: I'm just a language model, so I can't help you with that.
Me: Then why did you ask?
Bard: "I understand that you don't need me to run a reverse phone lookup, and that's perfectly fine. I just wanted to offer the service in case you were interested."

I tweaked the question and Bard responded with a Python script and a phone number regular expression.

Our jobs are safe for now.

Something strange happened the other day… I requested the "free" Community License of Syncfusion (the company that provides a lot of .net, uwp, web, etc. components).

After a few minutes they called me... although I didn't provide my phone number…
I signed up using my LinkedIn account, but there isn't my phone number there… 🤔
I don't remember I've ever shared my phone number anywhere on the internet, but ok… maybe I did in the past.

More than 800+ components for free (if you're not a big company), a really nice offer.
So I decided to send the link to my friend.

He doesn't even have LinkedIn… he created a fucking new account just for that, without any private information about himself.

10 minutes later… they called him. HOW? 😱

We checked our accounts on Syncfusion, created just before that (without writing anything about ourselves, just by clicking on "Sign In"), and they have our addresses… How do they fucking know where I live?

I still can't understand how they did it, my phone number is registered to my father, so they couldn't just search it…

The same day they sent me an email.
I answered it asking "How did you know my phone number?".
They replied: "I got your number because when you downloaded our community license you put your email and phone number.".
I never did it. They didn't ask me anything.

It'll probably remain a creepy mystery… it's really so easy for a company to steal your data, and they really do it so publicly without any problem?

So, I've been programming a number of years, mainly .net, I've been looking at python recently and it just seems wrong to use variables without declaring them. It just seems dirty

Just submitted my first app to the Microsoft Store 🎉🎉

It's a simple offline password manager that also accepts other formats of data such as credit card and personal info.

Made it using WinUI 3. To prevent you from forgetting your master password, each "locker" accepts an unlimited number of passwords. If you forgot one, you can just use a different one. This is my idea to make offline password managers a little less of a hassle.

Can't wait for approval from the store!

A number I need to remember.

Because I've just passed it!

The increasing number of people with pronouns in their profiles at my job is really annoying. I don’t know you and I am not participating in your delusions with you. If the company makes it mandatory, I will refuse and force them to fire me over it. I cannot work effectively at a company that has hallucinating employees with no grasp on objective reality. There’s no way to know whether decisions are based on solid objectivity and data or just how someone “feels”.

Today I had to write a unit test to test a method that internally used a random number generator...

Aha
Ahaha
Ahahaha
My test was literally just assertNotNull...

Had my hairdresser tell me she thought her phone number was a great password for all her online accounts.

Just smiled and nodded, I feel there’s a time and a place for lectures on internet security.

I just got a call from the UK. When 7 picked up, the lady said "Hello Edwin, how are you?". I never replied and just hung up.

I don't know how the fuck she got my number and name right? I know my name is public but my phone number is not.

Just visited a relative whose flat number was: 404!
As anti-climatic as it could get, I could easily find it 😜🤷🏻‍♂️

This is the Result Declaration form of our university, It's all good but there is one thing (bug) in this form, you only need to fill the Recaptcha once and you can that same Recaptcha to extract as many results as you want. Though not a Security issue, we can extract results of many students as roll numbers are sequential, we just need a bot to fill roll number and click the button. The only use would be to conduct surveys on results, but, a bug is a bug.

Like WTF!

"the value of NaN is result of an operation that cannot produce a normal result. NaN is not equal to any value, including itself."
The funny or wierd part (maybe just for me):
"You can detect NaN with the isNaN(number) function".

Like whaaat? 😶

This is how Pokémon Go shows errors to its users. It says a generic „Error“ in German with different numbers for different errors.
I am not an UX expert, but isn’t this a really bad practice? The error number has no meaning to the user, so why displaying it? I think it is just confusing and looks ugly 😐

Sometimes hardest part of being dev is staying calm and trying to explain someone why something is a BAD idea, than see being ignored and just silently prepare fix so when shit goes south you can quick fix shit the other dude/dudette fucked up regardless of number of warnings.

Sigh, another dumpsterfire of this variety incoming.

So salty. Just got off from a long day at work with my coworkers after a significant sprint, so we all go to karaoke to celebrate and let loose. But naturally I have to be under 21, and the karaoke place cards, so I end up taking an Uber home by myself, which felt really fucking embarrassing. I wish there were venues in the city that didn't require you to be above the magical number of 21 years of age to have a good time.

FFS, just because they do it that way on a competitor website doesn't mean it is either good, right or the best way to do it. My next door neighbours car number plate is held on with gaffa tape, im not about to copy that and suggest everyone should do it. Dim fucking irrational, know it all clients. GO FUCK YOURSELVES!! From my research i could probably run your business better than you anyway, your whole fucking outlook is fundamentally flawed. Cunts!

Just a package machine into which you'd put the number of your package then get it. Apparently it runs Ubuntu and it's not set to start automatically. Damn part of me wanna connect a keyboard and find out what it has to offer.

I got a new debit card from my bank, jumped online, to activate my new card.

I see a picture of my card, with the last 4 digits of my account number show. A big "activate" button right next to it. Sure thing. Click the button, and guess what piece of information I need to verify I am the true owner of the card. Fucking last four digits.

Fucking hell - you just showed me the digits a page ago.

Tired of hearing "our ML model has 51% accuracy! That's a big win!"

No, asshole, what you just built is a fucking random number generator, and a crappy one moreover.

You cannot do worse than 50%. If you had a binary classification model that was 10% accurate, that would be a win. You would just need to invert the output of the model, and you'd instantly get 90% accuracy.

50% accuracy is what you get by flipping coins. And you can achieve that with 1 line of code.

i'm sorry but i am just FORCED to share the recent dialogue with my friend.

he bought a winrar license and got a 4digit customer number

VSCodium, just for a little moment, please go fuck yourself.

I mostly use netbeans but for just a little I'm using VSCodium (VSCode without the Microsoft calling home bullshit).

Just had this error I didn't see that fast and then, usually, whenever you put your cursor on the tee underlined code, it tells you the error in this drive-by popup thingy.

The goddamn popup disappears so fucking quick that its impossible to read.

Ended up trying to capture a screenshot in time which worked at try number 10+, then saw the error and corrected it.

VSCodium go fuck yourself. I'm not ready for this shit when I've just woken up and haven't fully drank my first coffee yet (or this is more like a triple espresso as for strength)

😡

Recreated minesweeper... Sort of

Some how Medium is still extremely hard.

Seems just using a random number generator for Mine placement doesn't make good games...

Fuck the NBN - you aussies will know!

So apparently Fixed IPs are not a thing for HFC connections unless you have a business account.

Are you fucking kidding me?

Although I didn’t pay for a fixed ip on adsl and it states it’s “dynamic”, mind you it hasn’t changed in 6 years... so it may aswell be fixed right? Right?

Now I have to go explore DDNS with Cloudflare, looks like a api call on ip change will do the trick but urgh.

Ps: I finally.... made it to the nbn - well that’s next week...

only 3 years overdue since my first “NBN ready” letter 😂

My senior just created this beauty of an API...

Mixing undefined/null values with empty strings & random hyphens for other variables. And the phone number not following standarised notation (we are a telephone provider)

My failed interaction with a girl:
So I go to a convention at the university.
It's nice I'm having fun, I see a girl dressed as Hermione, she is cute so I go talk to her for a little we joke around I'm really starting to like her. Then I say bye and hang out with friends for the rest of the evening. I see her leaving so I run to her and after catching up to her I ask if I could have her phone number. She says yes and enters her number on my phone. I'm super happy. I excitedly wait for the next day's evening to message her. We message for a while the next day she messages good morning, so I think things are going well, she must like me too right ? I mean we glanced at each other at the convention, she gave me her phone number and messaged good morning so I'm pretty sure she does...

Turns out she doesn't, she says she thought I wanted to be friends...
WHAT ?! FRIENDS ?? Are you 12 ? What friend would run to you to get your phone number and after getting it there would be a stupid grin on his face ??? She looks at 9gag and doesn't know the most overly used meme of "friendzone" ? Unbelievable either she was screwing with me or she is just that socially dense. So after that I'm pretty mad but I don't say any mean things I just accept the fact like a gentleman and carry on with my life. But also feeling depressed after believing we actually had a connection. Ugh I guess back to the coal mines for me huh, stupid conventions 😒

Fuck Monday and SAs... Just arrived at office and logged in:

Consider changing your password:

**Ok... Enters new password**

We're sorry your password is invalid

?????

Let's I already have a lower, uppercase letter, a number

....

Adds a symbol

**works**

Difference in security though? 0.... But now I have one more thing too remember...

This.

Not the worst but almost all of us (including me) handle strings like fucking morons.

If the input doesn't need to be an exact match we use a explicit comparison operator, when the input should explicitly match we do a loose comparison operator.

I'll format the crap out of a number, convert it, validate decimal places, check for float rounding hell, give it a absolute value and return it correctly formatted for the users locale but half the time I forget to trim their input. 🤦‍♂

Like I said - just a tad fucking moronic isn't it?

Gentle reminder that you’re just a number to companies. If fucking you raw with an unlubbed cactus will make them more money, they’ll do it and tell you “it’s standard across the industry”

TL;DR: Google asked me to PROVIDE a phone number to verify connection from a new device, on the said device.

Yesterdayto log into my work Google account from my personal laptop to check emails, calendars update and so on. I opened up a private navigation window, went to Google sign-in page, entered my credentials, all is well.

Google then decided to "verify it's me" and prompted me to PROVIDE a phone number (work account without work phone means no phone number set up) so that they can send a verification code to the number I just provided to make sure the connection is legit.

Didn't want to do that, clicked "use another method" and got asked to fill the last password I remember, which would be my current password thanks to my trusty password manager. After submitting, I'm prompted with an error saying I have to contact my admin to reset my password because they can't log me in with my CURRENT password.

I ain't gonna do that, so went back to login page, provided my phone number, got the code, filled in the code, next thing I know I'm browsing through my emails.

What the duck? Could have been anybody giving any phone number. So much for extra security.

Also don't care that they have my phone number, the issue is more about the way used to obtain it: locking me out of my account and having no other way of logging in.

When scammers want to follow GDPR regulations - the worst SCAM ever 🤦‍♂️

Long story:
I have just received a SMS message, informing me that my phone number is in several marketing databases. It also had a link to the website called stop-sms.pl, where you're supposed to be able to unsubscribe from those lists. At this moment I felt a little bit confused - the SMS seemed suspicious, but on the other hand who doesn't want to get rid of all this SMS crap. So I carefully followed the link to see the website with a form to fill with personal data - phone number included 😆 If that is not enough to realize that this is just a lame scam website, just below the input where you enter the phone number there are Terms and Conditions where it directly states that: "By filling the form you agree that your personal data (name, email, phone number) will be used for marketing purposes." - WTF?!

Who the f... gets fooled by such crap?! 😂😂😂

When i started my work I encoubtered this db(one of 4): more than 20 tables, some with 200 columns literally... EVERYTHING is a varchar 😓.

I'm slowly designing some normalized tables with real fk on new features and projects and people are like: how the fuck did you implement this feature so fast? the other guy spent 3 months designing this form (and I'm just speechless):

The form was some sort of crazyness shit passing input names as "name-of-property" and a file only to check if(name="string") then store a number value to an array and save it as a "number" (actually varchar) on the db. literally more than 50 if statements to do this.

Everything on a single table that made no sense at all.

Just wtf... At least my boss let me start if from scratch cause he we were always having panick attacks every time he needed to do something with it. 😂😂

@dfox

On Desktop, when i comment or rant, please focus the textfield.

The number of times I almost had to buy a new pc because it almost learned to fly. Just because when you are ranting to vent, you don't want to get even ansier because you have been typing tin air this whole time.

Fucking useless bots.

I need a bit of help in getting some documents from my University, so I go into their site and they have a WhatsApp support number. Perfect, I think to myself. So I send them a message with my question and a fucking bot answers me with a list of categories for my question, none of them matching my question. So I answer the "Other" option and it just sends me a FAQ link. Like what the actual fuck? I contacted the fucking number because I need help from a damn human, not a fucking FAQ link you useless waste of server resources.

I have a confession. I have always used IDLE because I love it. It's slow, lacks a number of features, and is just all-around outdated.

So today I went and I got rid of it. I tried PyCharm in the past but it was too complicated for Python. I like JetBrain's IDE for Java, but not for Python. Instead, this time, I opted for Spyder. I tend to get quite excited about new IDEs, and I do like this one a fair bit. The editor offers a dark theme but the UI surrounding it does not. This is offensive, but acceptable, for the time being. Here's a screenshot. Any thoughts?

New idea: Fuck raytracing for global illumination because you just need too many rays for it to converge

What if we do surfels (to keep the number of probes down and relevant to our scene) and we update the 4x4-ish sized hemisphere irradiance maps not by tracing a single ray per frame per surfel. I have a fast as shit compute shader rasterizer... What if I just raster each surfel each frame? Should be around the same number of pixels as the primary visibility so totally feasible....

Each frame just jitter the projection a bit and voila. Should have extremely high quality diffuse global illumination at well below 1 ms. Holy shit this might just work

Recruiters who cold e-mail me get hard and specific questions before I ever give them a resume and phone number. Been doing this too long to just randomly hand a resume and contact info to whoever. YOU came to ME. Make it worth my while.

my friend was bragging how he could program a game on his TI-84 calculator
it was just a (buggy) random number game
I told him good job, I program a bit, too
he said "yeah? what do u do?"
I said "I made two apps"
he walked away
I thanked god

TLDR: Ask irritating questions, you could end up saving the company money and time...

I’m working on a project where we are integrating 2 legacy web applications with each other.

Business Analyst/Project manager (BA) : Save all the contact details of the selected firm in application A into the database of application B, then expose that data later so that we can output it into the document when the user generates them.
Me: Seems a bit excessive, there’s even a fax number, nobody uses that anymore, are you sure we need all that?
BA: The old document has all that information.
Me: Please just check with client that witch fields are still needed in the document.
BA: Ok, fine, but it’s probably a waste of time…
BA: * Talks with client on phone for 10 minz *
BA: Ok client stays we only need the Lodgement Number on the document.
Me: We already store that and populate it in the document.
BA: I had budgeted 2 days labour for all that, you just saved us a lot of money!

Ok, so one of the oldest guy is leaving from my company (on a good note) and he was involved in multiple things in our organization. From having access to almost everything (AWS, Github and owning multiple projects and our legacy code). I am supposed to take KTof one project and man THE CODE IS MESS. YOU DONT PUT A RANDOM NUMBER WHILE CALLING A FUNCTION. You are supposed to define a constant and use that. I've told my manager that I need at least 1 week just to improve logging.

Here I am just tryna browse a site and this stupid attempt to trick me into falling for a scam pops up. There is no way to stop the pop up because I can’t tap anything fast enough. Not even restarting the browser because it remembers this as the last URL it had accessed. Looks like I have to uninstall and reinstall chrome. Honestly, if you’re a scammer, what the hell is the point of doing this? What idiot is going to call the number? All it does is annoy you to the point of suspicion. Or maybe there are people stupid enough!?

!dev
I'm marking some exams for the class I teach right now, and I'm just so FRUSTRATED at the number of students that can't just fill out a STUPID multiple-choice answer!!! For goodness sake, don't just leave it blank, and don't give me 2 answers! How difficult is it to just guess a number between 1 and 4?!?!

just had to jump through ALL THE HOOPS to get a kid some help in Canada from the US. I can't believe the bullshit involved in reporting child abuse when the victim's in another country... why is there no standard for that? Why does Canada have IP and phone number filters for reporting abuse? Long-distance abuse reports do happen, it's not unheard of at all, so why the fuck would you actively prevent that?

I just found something cool on accident.

Assuming you start the fibonacci sequence on 2, you can find any of the fibonacci numbers for a given index with a simple trick:

Let Phi = 1.618
Let your index n = n+1

Floor(phi**(n+1+0.328))+1 = the fibonacci number at index n in the sequence.

This probably breaks down past some point but its nifty.

Just saw someone ranting in an App Store review that Snapchat is crashing for them so they can’t collect Snapchat flames and that flames are more than just a number.

World is doomed.

Worst interview question: "How fast can you do x?"

That's depends on the project scope, but I'll just throw a number out there that I think will make you happy.

Is it just me or devrant has a bug of showing false notification badge?
It's stuck on this number even though I don't have any new notifications

Repository maintainers that close the issues without much explanation or a good solution just to lower the number of open issues...(┛ಸ_ಸ)┛彡┻━┻

Ran a bamboo test suite which just printed '408 tests ran successfully'. It's only had return true :P

Periodically update test number.

One of the higher ups just sent me a message on my private phone number after 10pm asking if we could discuss something work related. I'm a working student, leave me alone.

We'd just finished a refactor of the gRPC strategy. Upgraded all the containers and services to .Net core 3, pushed a number of perf changes to the base layer and a custom adaptive thread scheduler with a heuristic analyzer to adjust between various strategies.

Went from 1.7M requests/s on 4 cores and 8gb ram to almost 8M requests/s on the same, ended up having to split everything out distributed 2 core instances because we were bottlenecking against 10gb/e bandwidth in AWS.

Why you would sell your company to Microsoft too!

1. Your company is so succesful， the valuation is so high， only a handful of companies could buy it.

2. Running a company takes a shit load of energy， and most normal people hope to relax at one point in their life.

3. People at the head of major international companies are not normal humans. They like do over work and they have one goal. Be number 1.

So good successful people sell to evil and more succesful people.

And when i say evil， i really just mean that being number 1 is more important than ethics.

Edit: spelling.

I just got a message from my company's front desk lady that someone called and asked for me and left a number for me to return the call. I've had a feeling about it and as it turns out, yes, it really was a recruiter who had the confidence* to call my company to sell me another job.

Don't you just hate *silly* password restrictions? Surely there is a very limited number of possibile passwords

On top of this their "password prompt" says passwords are between 6 and 10 characters...

So it's required by law to chip and register your dog. I just got a puppy so I had to change the owner of the dog from the kennel to me. And the only thing I needed was my chipvalue and the registration number.

So all I have to do is scan the dog and try the registration numbers and then I can change the owner. Like wtf. And it does not even send a confirmation email. I checked by changing owner and email again.

My registration number is only in the 600K so other registered pets should be easy enough to bruteforce.

Or am I missing something?

Ever wanted to have undefined behavior in Python? Do this in Python 2 (yes this was supposed to be a fibonacci number calculator with a limit but one of my classmates forgot the conversion just as seen below):
#Begin
def fib(n):
a,b=0,1
while a<n:
print a
a,b=b,a+b

fib(raw_input)
#End

Microsoft Market:
"You tried a wrong password too many times"
(I know fucker, I made a fucking mistake because I had to restart the pc 20 fucking times already, I've got confused, you pc-fucker)
"The activity is temporarily suspended, try later"

LATER? WHEN? I need to work you moron. Just give me a number!!! 10 minutes? 10 hours? days?
Work on improving security, lazy sod, not on slowing my job.

PS As soon as I can I'll change the password in "ImpotentCrackWhoreFucker8==0-)"

Stop fucking with the numbers.
A number is a number, integer or float.
Just because you wanted your stupid decimal place doesn't mean you need to fuck things up and make the front-end break because now its sending a string the server instead of a float. For fuck sakes. How long have we been doing this?

Remember about this project of mine? Maybe not because I deleted the rant, but after a long pause I re-started working on it. In -just- 1 hour I wrote this code that picks a random number, goes from 0 to 5 and, if found, it prints the match.
This is my most (useless && senseless) project by far.

First real dev project was a calculator for a browser game, that calculates the optimal number/combination of buildings to build. I got bored constantly doing it manually, so I made this program as a fun and useful challenge. It involved basic math, and I did it in VB.

Second one was a stats tracking page for my team in another browser game, that let us easily share and keep track of stuff. It allowed us to minmax our actions and reduced the downtime between actions of different players. HTML, CSS, JS, PHP, MySQL.

Third one was a userscript for the same game that added QoL features and made the game easier to play. JS

Fourth was for the first game, also a QoL feature userscript, that added colors/names, number limit validation to inputs, and optimization calculators built in the interface. It also fixed and improved various UI things. Also had a cheating feature where I could see the line of sight of enemies in the fog of war (lol the dev kept the data on the page even if you couldnt see the enemies on the map), but I didnt use it, it was just fun to code it. JS

From there on, I just continued learning and doing more and more complex shit, and learning new languages.

While I was exploring multiplication tables I stumbled on something cool.
Take any power of 2 on the multiplication chart.
Now look at the number in the bottom left adjacent box.
The difference of these two numbers will always be a Mersenne number.
Go ahead. Starting on the 2's column of a multiplication table, look in the bottom left of each power of 2 and get the difference.

2-2 = 0
4-3= 1
8-5 = 3
16-9=7
32-17=15

etc.

While the online journal of integer sequences lists a lot of forumlas, I just wrote what came to mind (I'm sure its already known):
((2**i)-(((2**i)/2)+1))

The interesting thing about this is it generates not only the Mersenne numbers, but if you run i *backwards* it generates *additional* numbers.
So its a superset of mersenne numbers.

at i = 0 we get -0.5
i=-1 -> -0.75
i=-2 -> -0.875
i=-3 -> -0.9375
i=-4 -> -0.96875

And while this sequence is *not* mersenne numbers, mersenne numbers *are* in this set.

Just a curious discovery is all.

I just had such a forfilling moment.

Normally, i often (force myself) go to bed at night, after i worked on a project of mine, with these thought saying "oh man i wanted to get that feature done today" or "i want to finish this and that part of my code".I am sure everyone of you knows the feeling, when your brain communicates that you are just not done for today.

Today it was different. I got a project of mine working in it's first state, where i put much heart, love and time in.Just a few minutes before i finished for today i got my server responding the expected numbers(some kind of pin-code). It's a very easy system: Someone(at the time only me and my debug mode :3) on a android phone request a verification which is checked and processed by the server. The server creates a random six-digit number, returns it encoded to the client and sends an email to the user, which currently sends it in plain text(shame on me).
Yeah, the user enters the number and voilà
And of course, all the Pincodes can only be used once.
I got to bed with this feeling of luck and succes.

I hope tomorrow is going to be a productive day!

I am so lucky right now.

Have a good day everyone!

I was almost 2 days in a task to find the reason of a bug in a client's process, then I found something really weird, that made all the team go to my desk to see wtf was happening, then a guy says, "wait, this was not supposed to be in there, I was editing this process in other environment (he knew it because of the number)" , what did we discover? Someone (they haven't told me who), was supposed to put a file in a folder, just it, but the motherfucker did put the file in the wrong environment folder. I lost 2 days chasing a bug that never existed '-'.

Fucking microshaft! I bought a custom controller from their shop as a birthday gift to my brother. Fucking first thing the website crashes with 500 with my main account so I call support. Said them its a backend issue and they should let the devs investigate. Support says they can't even contact them in anyway shape or form. Fucking great!
So since my account seems to has broken their backend I create another account using some random email while support tells me to fucking log in and out again (yeah man I tried that). OK wonderful new account worked I can buy the controller.

Now one year later the controller just fucking stops working (probably why its called Xbox one! controller). Wonderful I paid 90€ for that shit thing and now it won't connect anymore. Tried everything and searched countless forums, nothing helped. Fuckers say: JuSt ConNeCT iT tO YoUr XbOx oNe and it might magically work (TM). You fuck I bought it for PC why the fuck can I not just fix it using a PC. Do you want me to buy a fucking Xbox for 500 bucks just to get the fucking controller to work!? You shitfaced monkey!

OK then lets try that support again because that worked so well last time. I put in the serial number and... Fucking unrecognized number. Unrecognized number my ass. Go suck on a spiked club you buffoon!

Now I'm fucked because I don't have the fucking receipt anymore and the email was send to that fucking temp account I don't even know the email address for anymore (ノ°益°)ノ

If you put “up to” in front of “proposed salary”, which ofc is a very high number, I put your job offer in the trash. Just put the range or fuck off.

I will never understand how the little brain of recruiters works.
They write shit like we weren’t smart enough to see it.

> be me
> "let's have a look to my previous PHP projects"
> fire up xampp
> services up and running
> enters localhost:1111
> ERR_SERVER_NOT_FOUND
> bullshit, I know that port number is right
> tried all other solutions
> finally saw the config just to find out the port is 1337
> well fuck me in the ass
> pic related

PouchDB.

It promised full-blown CRDT functionality. So I decided to adopt it.

Disappointment number one: you have to use CouchDB, so your data model is under strict regulations now. Okay.

Disappointment number two: absolutely messed up hack required to restrict users from accessing other users’ data, otherwise you have to store all the user data in single collection. Not the most performant solution.

Disappointment number three: pagination is utter mess. Server-side timestamps are utter mess. ANY server-side logic is utter mess.

Just to set it to work, you need PouchDB itself, websocket adapter (otherwise only three simultaneous syncs), auth adapter (doesn’t work via sockets), which came out fucking large pile of bullshit at the frontend.

Disappointment number four, the final one: auth somehow works but it doesn’t set cookie. I don’t know how to get access.

GitHub user named Wohali, number one CouchDB specialist over there, doesn’t know that either.

It also doesn’t work at Incognito mode, doesn’t work at Firefox at all.

So, if you want to use PouchDB, bear that in mind:
1. CouchDB only
2. No server-side logic
3. Authorization is a mess
4. Error logs are mess too: “ERROR 83929629 broken pipe” means “out of disk space” in Erlang, the CouchDB language.
5. No hosting solutions. No backup solutions, no infrastructure around that at all. You are tied to bare metal VPS and Ansible.
6. Huge pile of bullshit at frontend. Doesn’t work at Incognito mode, doesn’t work at Firefox.

Been engaged in a silly-client-request VS stubborn-developer war since last week. They wanted a textbox where they enter decimals - generally in the form 1.234 - to automatically put the decimal point after the first number.
"What if it's 10.xxx or 100.xxx?"
"That won't happen"
"How much time will it really save them having to press another key?"
"Why, how long will it take you to do the fix?"
Etc, ridiculousness and rage increasing exponentially...
Common sense finally prevailed today. Just think of all those wasted milliseconds having to press the "." key.

I get some error when deleting an azure service so I put a support ticket asking for help. Just as I am about to close my computer for the day I receive an email saying:

"Product team will disable the account xxxxx from backend".

The xxxxx is our subscription number. The subscription that hosts not only that service but also production servers and databases, storage accounts containing backups, etc.

I replied to the email so hopefully disaster is avoided otherwise tomorrow wont be a happy day.

I'm genuinely shocked at the number of people I see on here bashing automated testing as a waste of time, simply because my entire career has taught me the opposite (and it's usually only non-technical managers I see who don't want to see "time wasted" writing tests.)

I'm also just as genuinely curious - what do you guys do instead? Just don't test and deal with production issues as they occur? Pass it off to a separate UAT / human-based testing department and let them sign it off? Assume that because you're using Haskell / some other discipline it'll work if it compiles?

We've all done this at some point: If there's a timer, but you don't want it to run out, just set it to a big number.

Hey guys, have a question. I have seen some colourful ++ on the right side of the total number of ++ the user has, and some others just have the total number of ++ what's that?

Found a nifty way of generating the 7th dedekind number because of how it uses the difference of powers, and the sum of the fifth and sixth dedekind numbers:

((5**d(10))-(5^(9)))-((((5+168)*2)+7581)*2)

Pretty sure its a one-off though. Couldn't find any generalizations. Just a happy accident.

I'm wondering if recruiters are just as irritating everywhere or that this is just the shitty situation we have in the Netherlands.

I was once called by an unknown number and heard a typical recruiter story. Since i never heard of or spoke to this person i kindly asked where he'd get my information from. Since mr, Recruiter didn't answer and just kept selling his great position i hung up.

He called back.

I picked up the phone again and he told me there were connection issues. I once again asked where he found my number. And again he just acted like he didnt hear me and sells his great position.

Hangs up and blocks the number. Go f(...) yourself damn recruiter!

Sooooo the computers at my university

printf("%f", 0.5);
Prints the biggest number a double can have, just... WHY!

Just a quick one:

Testing team: hey your webservice isn't returning the id number of this customer we used it to look up, fix it

I take a look and sure enough the test customer doesn't have an id number *screenshot of blank field*

I add an id number to the customer and test it out again. Lo and behlod, there's the id number! *screenshot* *send reply*

Seriously wtf this is basic

Dear recruiters, if you prefer telephone calls, why not also learn how to leave a message on a voicebox, display a caller ID, and list your phone number on some legit page on the internet?

Otherwise you'll leave the impression of a desperate outbound call center agent paid not by leads and conversions but just by the quantity of calls made during the day. If I had such a job, I'd also call voiceboxes and busy developers all day and get money for listening to signals tones before hanging up.

Anybody know any good .net web devs in Sydney? I'm sick of reading seek and LinkedIn resumes where 95% of the applicants have a phone number starting with +91 and are skilled in "user testing and SAP".

I mean, what are they expecting? "Absolutely sir, we will mail you a first class plane ticket right now for your interview! Oh .net was just a suggestion, you can code in COBOL if you prefer. And don't worry about that pesky working Visa, we can pay cash!"

I was recently asked to do tech support for an event being designed by webdesign and business students

All they asked me to do was generate a qr-code to their site. -_- took 10 seconds on a website. I even matched their color theme

Yet their rsvp system is to email an event account and they count the number of emails. Why wasn't I asked if I could set up a better system rather than a simple qr. I just learned about this and it's too close to the event to setup a better system and pitch it to them

I'll try to pay back some smaller credit by one large credit...

Hence I need to contact the banks and get one (!) fucking frigging stupid piece of paper which lists the account number and the amount of money I need to pay back.

Sounds simple ...

Well.

One bank just answered my email request by sending me that piece of paper. Except they didn't have any validation of my identity.

Yes. They answered the request of 'I want to pay back the credit in full, can u send me the necessary documents?' (more formal of course) with confidential data without any more credibility than my email address.

YAY.

Another bank requests a telephone call for identity validation and sending back a signed form via postal service...

Another bank just needs a PDF sent via mail with an electric signature (yeah. They were aware of what that means - I was shocked and confused) or a "qualified signature matching previous documents" (translated from German).

The last one offers a WhatsApp number - send a GIF / JPG or video and we answer directly.

I need to reach a higher state than drunk.

It's not funny to know how confidential data gets mistreated by companies who should have the highest security.

When we subtract some number m from another number n, we are essentially creating a relationship between n and m such that whatever the difference is, can be treated as a 'local identity' (relative value of '1') for n, and the base then becomes '(base n/(n-m))%1' (the floating point component).

for example, take any number, say 512
697/(697-512)
3.7675675675675677

here, 697 is a partial multiple of our new value of '1' whose actual value is the difference (697-512) 185 in base 10. proper multiples on this example number line, based on natural numbers, would be
185*1,
185*2
185*3, etc

The translation factor between these number lines becomes

0.7675675675675677

multiplying any base 10 number by this, puts it on the 1:185 integer line.

Once on a number line other than 1:10, you must multiply by the multiplicative identity of the new number line (185 in the case of 1:185), to get integers on the 1:10 integer line back out.

185*0.7675675675675677 for example gives us

185*0.7675675675675677
142.000000000000

This value, pulled from our example, would be 'zero' on the line.

185 becomes the 'multiplicative' identity of the 1:185 line. And 142 becomes the additive identity.

Incidentally the proof of this is trivial to see just by example. if 185 is the multiplicative identity of 697-512, and and 142 is the additive identity of number line 1:185

then any number '1', or k=some integer, (185*(k+0.7675675675675677))%185
should equal 142.

because on the 1:10 number line, any number n%1 == 0

We can start to think of the difference of any two integers n, as the multiplicative identity of a new number line, and the floating point component of quotient of any number n to the difference of any number n-m, as the additive identity.

let n =697
let m = 185
n-m == '1' (for the 1:185 line)

(n-m) * ((n/(n-m))%1) == '0'

As we can see just like on the integer number line, n%1 == 0
or in the case of 1:185, it equals 142, our additive identity.

And now, the purpose of this long convoluted post: all so I could bait people into reading a rant on division by zero.

So my Bank Account Number ends with 1 and I had given my details to a person for processing some amount. He got the number wrong and put 0 instead of 1 at the end. After exchanging mails regarding the delay in processing , i got to know about the problem.

So i called him and said - "So i can see that you have got the A/c number wrong. Because you have set the rightmost bit to 0 and it should be 1. umm sorry , i mean - it ends with 1 and not 0 !"

He takes a pause and says - "Ohhh! Really Sorry about that. I will fix it ASAP. And your coffee is on me. Just consider it one's compliment! "

Did you notice that the scrollbar in the devrant (android) app changes size depending on the lenght/number of posts/comments you can see at the moment? Just scroll down in the posts list and see the scroll bar crawl like a caterpillar 😮

! rant
I started to learn Matlab today. After I learnt that arrays starting with 1 in the Matlab, I started to think about why using 0 based arrays was made popular in the first place and I realized that C arrays actually just pointers and first element of the array is just a location pointed by array name. There is no need to add number to reach to the first element. After googling it, I saw that my assumption is true. Finding it all myself made me a little bit of proud 😀😀😀 Also, this expanded my horizon 🗻🗻🗻

My bank created a "new and improved" banking app asking me to take a selfie after first sending them a picture of my id.
I am already a customer of the bank, they have a copy of my id, why do they also want a selfie?
Also with the old banking app I could just call them from my phone number (which they also have) and they confirmed it was me over the phone by asking 2 questions and then provided me with a code to just enable the app on my personal phone.

What retarded way of writing a json feed is this? what the fuck!

Each product in the feed is translatable, but instead of creating a new object in the feed with the translated content, there's an additional field pointing to a language code (this applies to all translateable fields).
Then each translatable field is appended the number which matches the number appended to the language field containing the desired language code.

In addition to that, the keys doesn't have any sensible meaning, but appearently they abide by som obscure "GS1 / GDSN" standard.

So for each "distinct" field I have to look up the definition of that key

If just the language code and the actual value keys was grouped together.. but no, the feed is ordered by the number after the 'D'.

Yeah for being stuck with something that looks like infinite scrolling, because one product object is fucking gigantic.

FUCKING INSANE MANIAC PIECE OF TRASH.
@#%!#€&

Might start asking monthly or weekly questions just for the hell of it so heres number 1...

If you have a prototyping/code naming convention, what is it and why?

Trying to switch from 2 finger bird-view typing to 10 finger no-view. Fuck this is hard! I'm just veeery slowly getting used to it, although I tend to fall back automatically when I don't focus on it and just want to type in a few characters.
I keep doing several typos and often forget where a key was exactly or confuse the position of some character, even though I typed it fairly often before. Also typing any number or non-alphabetic letter is mostly a wild guess of finger position.
Either I'm a very slow learner or smth's wrong.😪

Have you ever thought to send a security code to the email the user put in the sign up form just to say him later "the password must contains at least 8 characters, etc." and ask him to fill the form again from scratch?

Who is so dumb to put the input check in this order? Honeywell.

- The email is correct?
- Ok, send a code and ask to confirm it
- The password meets the requirements?
- No, ask to confirm the email again just for fun.

I'll just ignore the waste of server resources to send N * Number of users emails for no reason.

I hate iOS so much. Just hit a nasty bug where "optimizer" in browser sometimes randomly replaces a function with a number. Like WTF? Was developing a webpage working on iOS too easy, so they enabled a hard mode where some of your functions may turn on you?

I feel shitty cause I've never wrote near 100 lines of python code or just a large number of lines in any language. I want to write large amounts of code that will actually work.

How do you identify a programmer with just one question? Ask him to pick a number from 1 to 100.
(Disclaimer: 1% of margin of error).

Super brilliant idea for Windows: when logging on with a password that is only slightly mistyped, or with the consecutively appended number from the previous month, it should still be accepted. So much more usability - Microsoft just cannot reject that!

Had a manager that, during performance reviews, would say things like:
"You need to work harder on managing our clients' warm fuzzies."
"I can't give you a hard number to strive for on this metric here because you'll just do the minimum"

Needless to say, the turnover in that group was insanely high.

Super easy to get motivated to work on my own projects every Friday: I look back at how many and how difficult the things I worked on during the week. I take how much I got paid and divide it by the sum of (numProjects * difficulty(1 to 4)). If I spent anywhere near that number on just coffee this week, well then Friday afternoon goes towards working on my own projects (yeah Friday morning- still have a lot of work to do and coffee to drink.)

Hey there people, I have a few questions regarding neo4j. Your experience could also be very useful to me here @dfox.

1. Is neo4j good for storing user data, like password hashes, etc.. In addition to the regular relationships with other components of the ecosystem

2. Is neo4j good enough to accommodate a really large number of users..

3. Does DevRant use a dual database, like user info in Mongo and relationships like comments and ++ on neo4j or is it like everything on neo4j

For q.3, if you're not @dfox then just provide an idea of how you would handle the situation.

Nice little feature from Warp, auto hiding secrets, although this isn't a secret it is just a version number 😅

It never ceases to amaze me just how big 64 bit memory space is. It's so unrealistically big that on contemporary processors you can't address the middle and the size of that dead spot (the number of high bits that must be the same in a valid address) is barely worth mentioning.

Reading OpenSource lib that write in TypeScript is a nightmare

WTF:

export function concatMap<T, I, R>(
project: (value: T, index: number) => ObservableInput<I>,
resultSelector?: (outerValue: T, innerValue: I, outerIndex: number, innerIndex: number) => R
): OperatorFunction<T, I|R> {
return mergeMap(project, resultSelector, 1);
}

That is just fucking definition, no execution code inside

Maybe I'm severely misunderstanding set theory. Hear me out though.

Let f equal the set of all fibonacci numbers, and p equal the set of all primes.

If the density of primes is a function of the number of *multiples* of all primes under n,
then the *number of primes* or density should shrink as n increases, at an ever increasing rate
greater than the density of the number of fibonacci numbers below n.

That means as n grows, the relative density of f to p should grow as well.
At sufficiently large n, the density of p is zero (prime number theorem), not just absolutely, but relative to f as well. The density of f is therefore an upper limit of the density of p.

And the density of p given some sufficiently large n, is therefore also a lower limit on the density of f.

And that therefore the density of p must also be the upper limit on the density of the subset of primes that are Fibonacci numbers.

WHICH MEANS at sufficiently large values of n, there are either NO Fibonacci primes (the functions diverge), and therefore the set of Fibonacci primes is *finite*, OR the density of primes given n in the prime number theorem
*never* truly reaches zero, meaning the primes are in fact infinite.

Proving the Fibonacci primes are infinite, therefore would prove that the prime number line ends (fat chance). While proving the primes are infinite, proves the Fibonacci primes are finite in quantity.

And because the number of primes has been proven time and again to be infinite, as far back as 300BC,the Fibonacci primes MUST be finite.

QED.

If I've made a mistake, I'd like to know.

Recruiter: What are your expectations?
Me: I am flexible with the number. You must have allocated a budget for the role. We can discuss that number.
Recruiter: I have all the budget. Give me your number.
Me: 12.
Recruiter: That’s around 100% hike.

DIDN’T YOU JUST FUCKING SAID YOU HAVE ALL THE BUDGET?!

This one was from my Tech Lead, She had to update phone number of a customer in Database on production server. And guess what she forgot 'WHERE'. Next we were facing each other with poker face. :|

p.s: fortunately we had backup of just 4 hours back. Still we lost data of about 100 people.

I am so done with these “Top *insert a number*” websites that use slides to show items and every time you go to the next slide it loads another page. Why can’t they just use one of the thousands of javascript frameworks and load the page once?!?!

I'm getting tired of coding. Not really the coding part, the dealing with people who tell me what to code and why part. Sort of considering making a move into a scrum master or PM role just so I can get fired when I say "No, we're not changing everything they've been working on in the middle of the sprint" or maybe "Yeah, no we're not going to put in a bunch of tickets to change the UI/UX without first talking to the designers, because that's what they do. Yes, I realize we aren't Facebook, but do you realize we "compete" with them because a huge number of people will compare our usability to theirs? (even if just subconsciously)"

Learning information security yet again after doing multiple information security things for company and manager is pushing to do it saying "due immediately" and they're after sending "a number of emails" (it's due in a month and they sent 1 email).
Annoying that these things must be done again and again just because someone in sales let something slip or left their journal behind like a dumb dumb. It's not like I'm never off-site with my stuff or I interact with customer(s) yet

Another GeeksForGeeks rant

Wisecrack got me a bit interested in primes (just a passing interest). I looked up their python implementation of "Sieve of Atkin". Wow, is it bad.

First of all, they use PascalCase instead of underscore_natation so that's points off right there.

Their function takes a limit as a parameter (pretty obviously).

Their program breaks if you pass a prime number as a limit. That's right, if you give it a 2, it breaks. Pretty pathetic.

Reading the comments, their Java implementation is wrong too.

For fucks sake guys, if you're going to have an algorithm blog at least write good algorithms.

What is it with shipping websites sending you an email saying "hey, here's your tracking number and tracking URL!" and then that *very same link* saying "this tracking number doesn't exist, it can take a few days to show up sometimes, try again!" I'd understand if this was one knock-off weird company, but it seems to be *all of them*.

Seriously, how hard is it to just initialise a tracking number at the point you send that email so it at least shows a "parcel not yet picked up" or similar message? I know it doesn't make much material difference to tracking but it just reeks of bad UX and lazy / incompetent devs.

Just realised that I haven’t properly laughed in a long long while.

Don’t even remember the last time I laughed.

Don’t remember the number of times I have laughed since starting my corporate life.

Has anyone experience with true full remote working?

I keep searching for job postings, but they mostly have huge BUT(s)

- remote BUT you need to be resident where the company is
- remote BUT you need to have a valid vat number and it won't be a contract, just a "we will ask x hours per month, you get no vacations or sick days"
- remote BUT you need to be in our timezone or work at our hours.

I am lately thinking a lot about what to do with my life due to the possibility that i will move with my sweet half and... We live very far apart so it's like... A bummer to be bound to a place. Especially since they love where they are, but i have a free house which I inherited, so... Could be nice as a fallback

Edit: the vat number thing is not necessarily bad, but one of the main reasons to work as an employee is that i get sick days and stuff, if i have to follow your hours, get no sick days/vacation days/benefits i may as well be a freelancer and gain more, lol.

How the hell do people handle being graceful in the face of others being confidently, dangerously, stubbornly wrong - particularly when they outrank you?

It's a genuine question. I'm decent at my job but I've met a good number who are way better and also totally diplomatic in the face of the relative idiots (including me) . Is it just the fine art of giving less shits?

This, thankfully, I didn't create myself. A shop I recently ordered something from had the worst username / password default combo.
After registration they gave you a default Password, your zip code. And your unchangeable username is your customer id, a five digit number which just increments for each new user. And because it is a shop which is only used by people of the same region there are maybe 10 different zip codes.

So I want to inform my internet provider of my new phone number, but I can't remember any of my login info for their web interface because I never used it. Luckily, they have a "forgot my username" function, where I submit my email address and get a confirmation that my username has been sent to me.

Yet, I just don't get said email. I try again, but no avail. So I just guess my username and use their "forgot password" form, which – hooray! – confirms it just sent my an email.

But I don't get any email. I retry, I retry after a day, but no automatic response. I remember a incident a few years back when I didn't get some automatically generated mails from a company and decide to contact their support if they could just reset my password manually.

Nearly a week passes.

Now I received the answer. I just don't have an account.

Lesson learned: Next time I'll just input garbage first to check if those forms are sane.

Short contract job, helping a solo dev.
Me: what's these "200" everywhere?
Him: the max number of sensors we support. I know it should be a define, but it just became that way.
Me: <shrugs. Well, I'm only staying here a couple of weeks. Goes on working on my own branch>

A week later, manager says: "now we need to support 400 sensors!"

Solo dev: <searches and replaces all occurrences of 200 with 400. The program breaks>
Me: what happened?
Him: I only changed the max number of sensors!
Me: Mmm. <searches for 199 as well... Bingo. Creates a define, searches for 198 and 201 for good measure. Gives him no comment about my change>

More than once recruiters have thought it's a good idea to phone my desk to try and recruit me. Fine I can just say no thank you and move on, it does however get a bit awkward when you're interrupted talking to your boss by a recruiter phone your desk and you've aliased their number on lync as 'ass clowns'

I’m finally getting used to C and my brain doesn’t like it lol. Finished a problem set in like 30 minutes but now my mind is trying to process command line arguments in main and it’s just 🤷. like how can it take anything without just dying?? it’s defined as a string, but it can be a number without dying??

During my first-ever technical interview, the interviewer asked me "Do you know the FizzBuzz problem?"
"Uhh, not really." (I was just thinking ok this problem has a name, must be some algorithm problem)
"So the problem is basically to give you the numbers 1 to 100, if the number is divisible by 3, print 'Fizz', if divisible by 5, print 'Buzz', if divisible by 3 and 5, print 'FizzBuzz'. For other numbers just print out the number itself."

After hearing the problem, I felt so many ideas popping out of my stressed brain.

I thought for a bit and said "ok, so if the digit sum of a number is a multiple of 3, then the number is divisible by 3, and if the last digit is either 0 or 5, it's divisible by 5."
Then I started to code out my solution until the interviewer said "there's an easier solution. Can you think of it?"

This stressed me out even more.

I thought for a bit and said "well, starting from 3, keep a counter that records how many iterations are done after 3. When the counter hits 3, that number would be divisible by 3 for sure. Should I try this solution?"
The interviewer said "Sure." So I started again.

However, I struggled for about another 3min until I realized this solution is a lot harder to implement. The interviewer probably saw my struggle too.

This was the point where he stepped in and asked me "Ummmm there's an easy way of solving this. Have you heard of the MODULO OPERATOR?"

In sheer embarrassment, I finished the code in 30s.

Of course, there was no further question after this, and I felt the need to seriously reevaluate my intelligence afterwards.