I don't get it -.-!

Client: is it possible to make my computer unhackable, untraceable, and make it to were it can never get viruses?

Me: yes!

Client: How?

Me: Just don't go on the internet.

I don't get it, why would you put infinite scroll on a site that has useful links in the footer?

I don't know why but I LOLed.
(Open it up to get the full image)

Me everyday while surrounded by other people... You guys help a lot.

Got a great boss!!;

Me: Hey, do we have a corporate GitHub account?
Boss: *excitedly* do we need it? We'll get it!
Me: uhh, yeah, we need it 😉

Don't care he doesn't know what it is, got his trust to get all the right tools!

Step 1. Get a large touchscreen monitor. Connect it.

Step 2. Modify the driver so touches don't actually cause clicks or anything.

Step 3. Let it play a sudden, loud BEEP instead. Increase the volume for each subsequent touch.

Step 4. Lean back and watch people learn that you don't like your screen being touched.

You won’t get it. But I don't care.... :)

Q: How did you get into artificial intelligence?

A: I don't know it seemed logical -- I couldn't find any real intelligence

Jesus fucking christ, entering w3schools.com (don't ask) and I immediately get a cookie consent thing shoved in my face.

WHY?! Please don't tell me it's so I can get the 'best experience' because that's straight out bullshit. I don't need cookies and you fucking name it to get 'the best fucking experience' while looking up again how that one PHP or HTML or CSS or WHAT-THE-FUCK-EVER thing worked.

E-v-e-r-y GODDAMN site has this nowadays, to 'improve my experience' - I block ads anyways so what's the motherfucking point?!

Mother of FUCKING god.

alskdjaioethsdjlkjrfoikmedr

I don't get 50 shades of grey.

They should have called it: "256 shades of gray unless you're on 10bit HDR, then its 1024 shades of grey"

That would have made much more sense

"I don't accept this, I demand that this gets solved right now"

It's funny how clients think that demanding that something gets solved "right now" will actually get it solved faster/right that moment.

We get it, you don't know how to quit vim...

"I want to create a Linux distribution from scratch but i don't know how to code, I'll pay you $300 but i get to have the rights to it"

!rant

First day on the job. Get Windows 10 laptop. Ask if I can use Ubuntu.

"Well everyone else is using it so I don't see why not"

So. Much. Win!!!

A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer, and a programmer are riding in a car.

The car breaks down and coasts to the side of the road.

"Hang on," says the mechanical engineer. "The problem is probably the engine, let me have a look at it and I'll have us on the road again in no time."

"Wait," says the electrical engineer. "The way it just stopped like that, I think it's the electrical system. Let me have a look and I'll get us going again in a minute or two."

"Hold on," says the computer engineer. "Why don't we all just get out of the car and get in again, and then see if it starts?"

Alternate punchlines:

"Why don't we open and close all the windows, and then see if it starts?"

"Why don't we remove parts from the engine until it starts successfully?"

Other guy: Hello! I need your help! I don't have my password for my gmail ! Help!

Me: Okay, ... (proceed to guide him where to recover the passwords), Now enter you email in.

Other guy: Well i don't remember it either, Help me get my email.

Me: ...

Fml

Anyone else notice this trend:

1. Don't go to uni / drop out (who needs education).
2. Get a job in IT, it pays well (who cares you don't have a structured logic).
3. Learn need-to-know stuff only (I only need to know my code).
4. Tell others they should get into programming, it's not that hard.
5. Get asked about the workings of a computer, but that's not in your domain of work. "I only code".

Millennial much ?

Co-worker: I don't get it, what's devrant about?
Me: rant about co-worker

Don't cry on weekends.

Cry on your workdays and get paid for it.

Don't let capitalism win.

"We need to get visitors age, gender and it would be nice if we could get city too.. can we pull this from the cookies so they don't have to enter the information on our site? How much info can we even pull, we need as much as we can get"

I literally kicked a wall when I received this message

Apt-get install *

Just don't do it. It's not worth it!

Normally when someone calls in and I pick up, they either don't call from an authorized number and get mad when we I don't give information, ask for advice and then say that it isn't logical and ask for a different answer or are just stubborn as a motherfucker.

Then I suddenly get a call from someone who I can verify easily, listens carefully to my answers and thanks me in the end.

Where can I get more of those clients?!

I hate it when people don't want to work for themselves and when I share something for their knowledge

"Wow what pro", "Dude you're so smart" etc in a sarcastic manner.

Dude wtf, you don't want to improve yourself then fuck off. You're there because of yourself not because I fucked it up for you.

You reap what you sow and i don't need people discrediting my effort to get to where I am today. I get it, I'm not even what you would call "pro", So what shitface?! I wanna be there someday. If you don't then just die. I don't need people like you in my life 😬😬😬

Friend :- Dude i made some changes and the code is not working now.
Me:- Bro, Do you even GIT it?
Friend :- No i don't GET it how it happened and how to restore it.
Me :- You destroyed my pun and my faith in your development skills -_-.

I don't get people who rant about missing brackets... Your IDE/Editor will notice it and you're going to notice it. Unless of course you use Notepad.

It's not funny anymore.

Some people simply don't get it,
// Via reddit

When your girlfriend takes notes for you over the phone so you don't forget it before you get home.

Asked to do a technical interview task. It has expected input and output.

My code does what it needs to and produces the desired result.

Get rejected and no feedback given when asked.

Juniors won't get better if you don't communicate my dude 😒

This is what I've been saying all my life but tech recruiters just don't get it....

"Can you do this?"
Sure, give me the information I need...

"We don't have all of it yet"
So I can't do it then

"Well when can you do it"
When you get the information

"Do you need *all* of it"
Well, it's either I do half a job and waste my time, or get it all done in one shot

"The client wants it tomorrow"
When will we have the information?
"We don't know"
Well they aren't having it tomorrow then, are they...

Sales people... don't care *how* things work, as long as they get a tick against their name to show they've sold something...

Don't you love when you want to buy a domain and it says it's unavailable so you check out the site and get greeted with this...

EDIT: Don't ask why the image has a black thing around it because I have no idea

I'm seeing a pattern here... We devs/testers/sysadmins/etc. don't get to spend too much time outside... We talk about different stuff than most people... We are more intelligent than most people so we don't get their dumb jokes... Most of us like to work at night because that's the time when nobody bothers us...

We don't get a chance to find a girlfriend, we don't understand how it works...

We are doomed

Wish me luck, ranters. Tomorrow I start working in an IT company for the very first time. Hope I don't get fired very soon, freelancing is hard. And I still owe >1300€

non-dev (but still in IT) friend: *sends meme* "I don't get it!"

me:
int ThingsToBuyFromGrocery()
{
int milk = 1;

if(store.HasEggs())
{
milk = 6;
}

return milk;
}

friend: "Woah! You're so smart!"

Made the mistake of mentioning ISO27001 security standard near management.

- "What?? Why don't we have that certificate?! Why are you not thinking about this?"
- "We don't need it."
- "Of course we do! we must have the highest standards!! Lets hire some lawyers and security consultants to help us get certified!"

A week later:
"Ok, turns out we don't need it."

Satan give me strength...

So I finished my personal website. It works fine on every browser... Except IE. All JS functions pass the compatibility check and I don't get any errors. Great.

Working with clients Across the globe.

12 pm their time.
This page is down, can you get it back up.

3am my time
Ok. You're just lucky I don't sleep.

Fuck dates and fuck date manipulation. Even when I think I get it right, I don't

When you know what you need, but don't know how to do it and can't get your thoughts into words well enough to ask on stackoverflow.

That moment when you get a great idea for a side project, and you know you don't have the needed skills yet, but you don't care 'cause it just means you're gonna have to learn more... just awesome 😍

I don't swear while in office.
I don't swear while at home.
It takes me about an hour to get home, during that time tho ...

For the love of God, we don't care that you're failing to get 15 ++'s to get your sticker. Obviously, if it didn't get a measly 15, then your rant wasn't that relatable/funny/likeable. Ranting about ++'s isn't going to get your crap rants any more ++'s

MILF marketplace.
The audience seemed to enjoy it but I don't think I'd get any investment.

If you're not a programmer, don't get a tattoo with code in it...

I don't get all this hate for windows, it works great, you can do everything on it and who wants to "customize" his os is just ranting uselessly...
I'm using windows to write this message and I'm not having any prob...

Is it okay for me to get pissed off because the interns don't know how to indent the code?

I wonder. What makes people so offensive about their opinions?

"How the f can you use Windows?"
"I can't believe you use android..."
"What an idiot he uses tabs..."

I don't get it... respect subjectivity?

If you don't get an error you're probably doing it wrong.

Today I learned a lesson from corporate survival 101.

The difference between get it done vs get it right.

Boss, manager always want to get it done, while developers always want to get it right, most of the time. If you don't listen to your boss, manager and insist get it right, will eventually cost your job. I saw many get it done code, either the dev moves to another team or already left. They avoid their own code forever.

Perhaps be a good student, not the smart student is a good way to survive. Thought????

It pisses me off that germany has no proper mobile reception fucking anywhere near rural areas.
And don't get me started on railway lines.

Also Telekom is just garbage.
We pay full price and get less than half of the data we're paying for.

Fucking hell rant over.

If you're a developer and you enjoy/love doing it... Don't get married. Don't have kids.

EVER

How many times have I ask my boss about the new project's deadline only to get "it has to be done by yesterday". Damn, boss, if you know, that we are occupied, then don't get a new project, only to blame the coder for promising an impossible deadline to the client!

Yesterday, my manager said "you don't have to worry, I'll take care of it"

Today, my manager says "finish it today by any means possible, otherwise I'm gonna get screwed by my boss"

Oh well...

The myth about the missing semicolon. I don't get it, if your editor doesn't pick it up, the compiler og interpreter will. How is this a common problem?

That's it. That's all I have for my home server setup. I don't even know why we have that sticky red thing, but today it came handy. And now I can SSH anytime I want, it's never going get shutdown 😂

My boss still don't get it

Can we clear this once and for all... Explain java and JavaScript like this...

They are like apple and pineapple...

In a recipe you wouldn't go yeah I could substitute in the other ... Because they are entirely different things ... Similar names... Entirely different !

We get it... They are different fucktards don't ... We get it... Ok....

It would seem that my most witty comments don't get as many ++ as the simple comments do.

Disappointing.

I don't get the pretentious coders who look down at anyone who uses any GUI over command line or anyone who uses an advanced IDE over Notepad++ or VIM.

We get it, you're hardcore, I don't care, I love code competition.

A few years ago I found a public AWS S3 bucket owned by a fortune 500 company containing a database dump backup with all of their users unsalted md5 hashed passwords.

I didn't report it because I don't want to get sued or charged. I don't know whether it's still public or not.

Does anyone else get this super lazy feeling where you want to write code but you don't wanna have to actually type it? Like I'm here in bed thinking about my projects but I don't wanna grab my laptop and get to work I just wanna think my code into existence.

Completely 100% not dev related.

But really I need the opinion of smarter people. Tell me how I don't make fun of the way people look, talk down on others regardless of <whatever>. Try to be as nice as possible to everyone, but the moment I say that I am not attracted to overweight people (women in my case since I am a heterosexual male) am I suddenly fatphobic and hate fat people. First of, phobia means fear, and I can assure people that fat people don't trigger any fear response from my end.
Nor do I disregard them as humans just cuz of them extra kilos. But suddenly because I explain how I can't be sexually attracted to someone that is overweight am I fatphobic?

This shit baffles me.

Him: Coding is completed. Just have to compile it.

You dumb fuck, go fuck yourself. Don't redefine meaning of complete. Get yourself a dictionary.

You know what I always hated about Stack Overflow?

When a newbie asks a question and really wants to learn something they get downvoted for 'we're not your teacher. Go learn it somewhere else'

When someone else asks a question and just expects Stack Overflow to magically produce working code for him they also get downvoted for 'we're not a code generator'

When someone finally asks a 'good question' but mentions in the last line it's homework they also get downvoted for 'We won't do your homework'

They also don't tolerate fun or opinions.

I never actually participated in Stack Overflow because to me it felt that whatever I asked, it would get closed for god knows why. And when I actually answered questions, and wanted to help someone, I would get downvoted for 'don't make someone else homework' or 'don't waste your time if they're not willing to put effort in it'

I still always 'used' Stack Overflow but read-only thanks to Google.

Anyone else feels/felt the same way?

Telling a UDP joke to someone who doesn't work in the Information Technology industry won't go over very well...because they probably don't get IT.

When I share jokes posted on devRant with others people don't get it. If they get they don't find the humour.

Happy to have a community of geeks,nerds,weirdos,outsiders.

I hate being so insecure. I don't start developing an idea because I think I won't be able to do it, I don't code together with someone who is better than me because I think they'll make fun of me or think I'm doing it wrong, I don't speak up in class even though I probably, definitely, know the answer. I feel like I'll never get anywhere if I remain this way. Anyone have some advice? Thanks

I don't always ask questions on StackOverflow. But when I do it, I get 0 answers and 10 views

Get yourself a proper set of peripherals (mouse, keyboard and chair), you will be using them quite a lot, so don't skimp out, it's you livelihood, so take care of it 🙂

Fuck CSS! I can't even... I don't know... I don't get it..

So today a client requested that the domain name in the address bar should be all capital letters because of corporate design. Don't get me wrong, this is a valid request for someone who has no experience in the IT world. But he refused to believe me that it wasn't possible. He even claimed that he has seen it at least hundred times and called me incapable. I don't get clients.

When you get a dinner for 2 gift for all the hard work you put in the last week and realize you don't have any woman to go with because of it

My supervisor's flaky attitude is annoying the shit out of me.
Mate, why would you agree to hire me for the project I wanted to do (and get me to move halfway across the planet) and then tell another colleague that I'm focusing too much on my project and they should give me their extra work?

Like, I get it but I don't get it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

My learning process :
Open library's homepage
Read.
Don't fully get.
Search stackoverflow.com for examples
Not quite yet.
Sleep
Got it!

AM I a bad developer?

I don't know why, but each time I have the chance to create a caching system with redis to e.g. cache requests to APIs I get all excited about it.

I don't get why anyone would choose to do sys admin work I have been doing it the past week I fucking hate it!

Let me program 😠

I have successfully employed a function that uses recursion....

Because I stubbornly tried every possible iteration of the code until it became right.

I still don't get why it works.

YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY IT IS HARD TO GET A JOB AS JUNIOR DEV? This is because you don't need any knowledge about coding to get the fucking degree!!

I would love to work harder but it should meen something if you own the fucking paper!

Sorry got triggerd after reading another rant!

Client :
When do you think we can get the website done with?

Me:
Don't worry, I'll get it done in 3 days.

Me after 2 and half days:

<!Doctype Html>
<html>
<head>
<title> Hello, what did you say the website does again? ....

Okay.. Serious question.

I have a game. And a license that i have to provide a name for.

..I'm transgender, and have get to get a legal name change...

Do I /have/ to claim it under my birth name? (I don't own a company, so i assume the answer is yes.)

"Can you fix/update/speed up my pc/laptop/phone/toaster/potato?"

I don't mind too much doing it for my family though, but sometimes it can get a bit annoying.

Don't you think DevRant needs favorite rants i find it quiet difficult to get back to certain rants!

Why do so many people use macs for developing?
I really don't get it.

I would draw furries.

Don't get me wrong, I would not enjoy it. But at this point I'm dependant on the cashflow, and that's the only other thing I know that pays well...

I. DON'T. GET. IT!

What's up with the !dev or !rant ?

I feel like a total fail 😭

I am .net developer which doesn't work with .net core(yet) and obviously i have windows as work os, while at home elementary OS is my main(again dual booting win10). I don't get why so many linux/windows rants are around. Get best of both worlds. I personally constantly need both and each are very different and better at handling different stuff, so why don't you (fanboys) stop it :)

Don't you love transferring server hosts and paying for a dedicated IP only to get given an IP that is already in use and forward it using the incorrect port .-.

*Deep breathing*

I've got a really good UDP joke to tell you, but I don't know if you'll get it

A rare weather phenomenon called "snezhura" (slush) was observed in St. Petersburg recently. I don't quite get how it works, yet it's still fascinating.

I've got a really good UDP joke, but I don't know if you will get it...

1. Learn to use Google.
2. If you don't know English, learn it. Most good resources are in English.
3. Be patient and don't give up. You'll get *very* frustrated, believe me.
4. Don't bother other people with stupid questions, refer to item 1. Only ask in forums/answer hubs if you can't find what you're looking for through Google. Yes, that means going into Google's second result page.
5. Don't get discouraged if you don't have friends your age that like programming. You'll find people with the same interest later :)
6. If you don't understand stuff right away, don't worry. Copy code from YouTube tutorials and change them a bit. No Ctrl + C Ctrl + V though, copy it by writing. Little by little it'll start making sense and soon enough you'll be able to write stuff of your own.
7. Most importantly, have fun!

(This advice comes from someone that started programming at age 10 in a county that doesn't speak English)

Guys I need your help. I'm a student working at a very small development business as a developer ( who would have thought) and I really love working there ( nice colleagues, I learn something every day) but recently I don't get enough work. it really feels like half of my day is spend running after the seniors asking for work and it starts to get really annoying not only for my but for them too. and most recently I'm just going home early because I don't want to just sit there unproductivly :/ but this is not really a solution either because at the moment I'm trying to work 40 hours ( I get paid 20) to get some overtime to not have to work as much as soon as my university starts. but now I don't get my hours and have to chase for work... does anyone have any advice for me?

If anything pisses me off more than some random client talking trash about my software bc they don't know how to use it, it is some guy taking credit for someone else's work and get away😡

PM's? Like private messages? No idea, still haven't figured it out. There's still idiots from technical chats sliding in, often with a question that belongs in the very same chat they came from. My Telegram name has now literally "(No PM!)" in it, and a bio that says in all caps "DON'T FUCKING PM ME", yet there are STILL people that don't get it. September never ended, did it?

... Oh. Project managers.

You have a JavaScript application. You have to keep up with stupid devs that don't know TypeScript because you don't have the time to let them study it and they get demotivated when they can't do stuff so fine, you keep it JS. You use JSDoc to write the documentation. You miss using TypeScript so you start doing some @typedef's. Oh your linter gets it and starts behaving as a substitute of TypeScript. You get excited and write more and more @typedef's! ... until they get so complicated that you start documenting *that*...

2017 and yet, here we are, still ripping up our clothes over tabs and spaces.

My bad if I missed something about this debate but I really don't get it.

The question "are you busy" is the most loaded fucking BS question ever. If you answer and say you're busy you get told that you aren't that busy since you answeted the chat. If you don't answer the messenger blows up your shit asking many more times and possibly even fucking calls you.

If I don't answer, I'm busy go the fuck away. "But it was super important and I needed it fixed right away!" Ok, but when I answered your message just 4 minutes after your originally messaged me don't make me spend another 5 minutes asking for information you knew I was going to ask for and could have provided in one of your follow up messages (Client name, website, page with the problem, description of the problem). Also, don't tell me that it has to get fixed because I'm the one who made the mistake. It has to get fixed because it's wrong, it doesn't fucking matter who made the mistake.

!rant

Sometimes I think I am (a developer) is similar to a samurai or a yakuza. Once we get into this business, we just cannot get out of it. :?

// I am starting to get drunk. It is lucky for you guys that we have 2 hours interval. I don't expect my next post to be any good.

Is it bad that I kind of don't like using DuckDuckGo as a search engine?

I mean, I use it cause duh privacy. But when it comes to search results- google always gets what I want-

Jesus that kinda sucks why can't i get both

I don't fucking get it why people find it normal to have a zoom meeting run in background for the whole working hours.

Like WTF

So...you downloaded a new keyboard you can't get it out of the second person. You don't know what to do. Help you, please.

I'm not sure why but I don't seem to like latex. Maybe I could get into it but it just feels weird.

Vim:

1. It doesn't matter on which server I ssh, I'll have vim, if not I can install it. So I get the same work efficiency I would get on my pc

2. It has a predictible behavior - u don't have to think which keybind is where, or how to do something.

3. Sky is the limited if you want to customize

Okay, I get it, spelling is hard, especially in a foreign language, but why in God's name don't you just install a spell check in your IDE?!

What?
I don't get it?
That doesn't make any scene....
goto line 5980
😎 coding like a boss....
goto line 8764
🤡 I have no idea what I'm doing....

Girlfriend: I don't get why you love me...
Me: Maybe I should write a Setter method to make it clear.

She didn't understand that joke ._.

Person: "Can you speed up my computer? Don't delete anything though."
Me: "Your hard drive is at 99%... you need to get rid of some stuff."
Person: "Can't you do it with out deleting anything?"
Me: "We can move it to a cloud service..."
Person :"No, that won't work. How will get my stuff back?"
Me: "Nvm..."

Has it ever happened to you that you don't feel like doing anything at all? And you go in a loop of procrastination and then end up wasting just another day of your life?
I don't know how do I get out of this ...
don't feel I have a passion to do anything in life now 🥺

why do people hate java? it is the most elegant and simple language one can learn and code powerful apps and software. i don't get it

UDP joke, I don't care if you get it.

SmallTalk!? I don't get it.

we get it relatives, you don't know what we do!!

Choooo chooooo (see my previous rant if you don't get it

I don't really get it why my co-male dev does not like ternary operator as a shorthand operator for if/else statements.

I don't usually get nervous about anything, but the interview I have today is for the job I really want. Hope I get it.

System Programmer Saga

I'm an old phone operating system programmer. We had to flash ROMs every time. You Android kids don't know how good you have it. Get off my lawn!

"Did you test it?"

"I can't remember"

For this question, Yes = yes, everything else is no, people just don't get it.

Be prepared to get it wrong, accept it and learn from it. Also if another dev corrects something you've done, don't take it personally. You can always learn from others.

I get being a noob and trying to learn but don't be a lazy ass by not even knowing if the library you're wanting to use is available for the language you're using it in.

Don't be this guy.

I can't login ffs
I don't care that it shows an impossible number of characters honestly, but I don't get why that should prevent me from logging in to any of these servers

For that matter, why the fuck is number of characters a signed int?

I don't get why the most devs are so into defending they're favorite programming language. I mean choose the language that gets the job done and not what's your favorite if language b sucks at doing a then I chose another one. So simple but most people don't get it. It's like the pc VS console discussion. Just play both period

Why don't managers/team-leads take into account the time that you get stuck on something that's stupid to ask but it eats up your hours :(

Who thought that "IP" was a good replacement for ifconfig... I don't care how great it is, you can't Google for "release DHCP IP" and get instructions like you could for "release DHCP ifconfig"

That nights when you start a project and don't get any sleep untill you finished it. 😴

Is it even possible to get good enough at regular expressions where you can just write it and you don't have to search stackoverflow for one that works?

!rant

I spent a few hours making a VS Code plugin to improve my work flow, published it on the marketplace a few days ago so that I can easily install it everywhere. But to my surprise that shit gets about 7 installs a day! I don't get why. I don't have clear instructions on how to use it anywhere.

But hey, I'm not complaining! 😁

Any meeting involving our UX team. They get a program to drag and drop pictures of pieces of the website and then wonder why the devs implementing it don't want to

C++. Damn the pointers. It's because I learned Java before C++ and the memory management in C++. I don't get it ever, the object creation, memory allocation, deallocation and everything

I've known about ligature fonts for about two years now. First thoughts where "ewh Im not gonna get used to it".
Kinda forgot about it until someone mentioned it to me. I tried it out since it was built in IntelliJ and don't want anything else anymore. But when pair programming I do get some confused looks.

What is your opinion on ligature fonts like Fira Code?

I don't get it. Why do front end devs need to learn algorithms to get their interview done?

some people literally want you to do all the work for them

then complain when you don't do it for them

i'm sure they'll get far in life

🤡

Uuugh... 'come let's build a standard with in the company'

Two ( and I kid you not) weeks later, we don't get it anymore let's build a new standard

I don't see the jobs.

-- I added them.

I don't see the "app-name".

-- Well, I have added them via an abbreviation "an".

Why though? That's so confusing. Why would I look for that? Assume I am a new employee. I would not know what it means.

-- You'll get used to it.

I. DON'T. WANT. TO. GET. USED. TO. IT. Why would you waste time by hiding necessary information behind non-saying abbreviation? Clarity counts.

Urgh.

God I hate React so bad
I get the hype but omg it is so confusing
Literally everytime I try adding something nothing works and I have to troubleshoot, EVERYTHING is a problem
And don't even get me started on REACT + TYPESCRIPT

IMO VueJS is just a smoother nicer experience overall

Doctor: "I have some news about your baby."
Parents: "Don't tell us the gender, we want to keep it a surprise."
Doctor: "Oh I get it, you're those type of people. Okay, well IT is not breathing."

So, I've been asked to build a tool that scrape's one's Facebook friends and their friends. I (surprisingly) managed to get it done.

I don't know what to feel about this.

I often don't see devs sad about the lack of sex in their lives.

Is it because we get fucked in the ass by management every now and then, to make up for it?

Those moments when you get up hoping that you don't screw up your day but then end up bugging your code rather than debugging it and then Git/other VCS comes to your help.

Is it polite/appropriate to tell a recruiter that I'll get in touch with them in several weeks? Their offer's really interesting, but right now I'm in charge of a large project and I don't want to leave it unfinished.

"The value used to compute the x position of either side of the rectangle."

and

"The value used to compute the x position of the other side of the rectangle."

I get it ... but man documentation if you don't already get it ... like nobody is gonna get that.

I asked the guy to make changes to this file that amount to 2 lines of code, not even, just 2 numbers increased by 1.

2 months later I'm getting all these complaints so I finally go look. 200 lines of code changed! I don't even get it but I sure get to fix it!

Is it too much LinQ for others devs to get ?

Personally, I don't think so.

Lambda Expression is fucking binary. You either get it or you don't.

Don't get dependent on desktop apps. Learn to do everything on the command line. That way it doesn't matter what machine you're using.

I'm happy to be getting a raise, but why do I have to have lunch with the boss to get it? I don't want to hang out with him.

Can somebody explain this joke? I don't get it.

I bought a new pc and am excited about using it, but, Windows wouldn't be Windows if its installation went flawlessly. Facking Windows.

For 4 evenings I've been trying to get Windows 7 installed on it, and it just fails with the sooooo helpful error message 😑 It's missing a driver for a cd/dvd drive but of course it won't specify which, or where to get it. Moreover, I don't even have a facking cd/dvd drive!! Moronic Windows. (I'm (trying to) install via usb). For fuck sake

I tried everything Google had to offer, but to no avail. Now I am just stuck. Silently sitting there... Not coming up with solutions.

I also don't have another laptop or anything so for every idea/attempt I have to go to friends to get it. It just pisses me off. FACKING Windows

Why these fucking companies don't support Linux on desktop and get rid of fucking Windows? Dell has developer edition laptops yes but they are not as available as Windows ones. Why don't other companies don't start such a trend? Oh let me say it, money! But as developers leave Macbooks for better choices, I think it's time for manufacturers to start investing in Linux as a replacement.

I might get a domain, but I can't buy it if I don't know what to do with it. any ideas???

Don't you love when you start feeling down because you once again shelve/abandon yet another project because you simply don't know where to start and can't decide how things should be done.

Why can't I seem to get a project off the ground without it looking like total ass!

I just don't get it! How do you guys keep your filesystem clean? How do you organize!??!

Can we all please try to keep emotion out of coding? It never ever helps to get upset at a code review.

Please please please accept constructive criticism, and dish it back to me! You can hate my code just don't hate me. :/

Started learning React recently cause the job I applied for reqires it.
So far so bad.
I...I don't get it.
It might be that I'm just starting out, but I can't see any practical use for it. I don't GET it.
Ugh..never been this frustrated (which I'm guessing isn't helping the learning process.)
Gonna have to wing the shit outta that interview.

Don't know if this is just me but I fucking hate it when YouTube move stuff around slightly.

For instance the search bar used to be on the left now it's centered.

I know I'll get used to it but it's kinda annoying.

I REMOVED every single thing that EVEN REMOTELY looked like it's handling redirections, I REMOVED ALL PLUGINS, and I STILL GET FUCKING REDIRECTIONS and THERE IS NO WAY TO DEBUG IT BECAUSE I GET REDIRECTED AND I DON'T GET A RESPONSE FROM THE CODE I WRITE and OF FUCKING COURSE it does not in any form LOG THIS SHIT ANYWHERE because fuck me that's why.

Truly, wordpress was created to punish us for our hubris.

So now they don't need it... So basically 2-3wks of work gone out the window...

Well at least I get paid either way and now I don't have to worry about releasing code that will might blow up in PROD...

Customer: I literally don't want to do anything make it work.

Support: here is a good video tutorial to get you started

Customer: I don't want to invest anytime in getting anything to work, just make it work.

Arrrrrggggg just use another service

To create a really amazing OSS, I don't even care if anyone uses it or if it becomes popular or anything, I just want to do it to prove to myself that I don't need to get paid to write good code, I can do it to make the world a better place too.

This has really been my main goal for a long time now, sure I've written some a few OSS but I don't consider them up to that standard yet, but I am working on something right now that will get close if I ever manage to finish it and if it is well written.

I want to code something today but don't want to get into it then have visitors show up.... Now I'm downloading Christmas music (FLAC in highest quality possible of course) and just browsing reddit.

Websites who offer drag and drop are just so frustrating! People asking why do we pay you to develop it as rather they can just drag and drop and upload! Someone make these whole lot understand that yes it's different, you don't get a design copyright there, then you don't get it full customizable, no additions, it's just replacement! Also, the performance part is sometimes deducted there!

Am I only the one who finds the pen pineapple apple pen video lame and boring?

Don't get people who finds it catchy and viral.

for some reason many of the girls at my school are obsessed with peppa pig and I just don't get it

I don't get publicity hungry personalities on Medium. Their usual headlines :

"Why we left `${ insert framework}`. There's nothing wrong with it though."

Either have the balls to say you didn't do your homework when you started, or hold your peace.

Don't screw the hardworking folks whose code you depended on before bailing out.

Is it normal to not like the projects given to you at work? Don't get me wrong. I bloody love programming but when I get a project that is not interesting, I feel kinda guilty.

I totally want to refactor my project's code, but I don't have any time for it and now it's a working piece of spaghetti-ish 😭

I'm just praying I'll get to do it once it's actually finished, so I don't have to work with it again in like a year and want to travel back in time and murder myself.

Girl: "Professor I don't really understand the algorithm. Can you please write it on the board again?"
Professor writes down the alphabet.
Girl: "I don't get it."
We were talking about traversing a Binary search tree in Inorder traversal.

I don't get annoyed so easily I think.. but when it comes to HTML... why the f*** do the comments have to look like something the cat just shat out?? Why doesn't it support one-line comment?? It's such a struggle to type...

My biggest regret is trying to learn JS because after learning Python I honestly don't get it

What is the point of removing code that will literally be added back in on another story? I just don't get it. I am in the code. It took two seconds to fix it but because it is not part of the story that i am working on someone is going back and ripping it out even though the next story is to put it in. Don't fucking complain to me because we are behind on this fucking project.

Get your facts right, people!! -__- If you aren't sure of what it means, then just don't use it!

All this talk of javascript fatigue, and yet when tools like parceljs come out people still regress to webpack... I don't get it

Don't you just hate it when someone borrows things from you and they don't even have the common decency to give it back the way it was borrowed.

Like come on! You borrowed my charger and gave it back to me without its head. Then when I asked you to find it you got mad. Is your fucking head straight? You even had the guts to shout at me. Stop playing like you're the victim and get real.

It's a great start of the week when your general manager asks you to get in to touch with a guy to ask about their return merchandise authorization system. And when I reply, sure, what would you like me to accomplish. You get the reply, I don't know, don't bother me with the technical details, they told me it should be super easy.

I don't know what 'it' is, but I'm happy that the man who can hardly use his macbook says its super easy.

Goddamn it! I'm trying my absolute best to get all the bugs you keep complaining about, but when you don't bother to explain exactly what you did to get to the bug you're making it really hard for me to help you. I know there's a goddamn deadline but you're killing me by making me take shots in the dark!!! FUCCCCCCCCCCCK!

Sending approximatively a 100 PRs to trigger a reaction of my colleague.. Like "it would be great don't you think so..?"

I didn't get one (PR) back...

I just found out YouTube ReVanced now has a kind of working patcher for android. It was easy to use and I don't have to use outdated vanced anymore. I can also choose which individual patches I want to used.
It's really nice. Even for people who don't want adblock and only want dislikes back since you can just disable that patch. I don't get why anyone wouldn't want to use it.

I have to open an IT ticket to install a printer driver. I don't know if the IT security BS can get even lower. These are the end of times

Git is way too complicated, but even then I still get painfully annoyed when someone needs assistance with using it. Especially when they're using some GUI I don't know. You mean this thing can't rebase??

According to my family, I make the machine talk to the other machines and the website. They don't understand how it can take so long to get it right, when I am dealing with protocols over two decades old 😋

I don't talk about Dev stuff with my friends/family. I try keep keep it to myself. They either get really angry, confused or they try to talk about things they know nothing about.

How does everyone get their team members to shut the fuck up and use IRC once in a while? I don't mind talking but if you're doing it *all* the time, *even when I have headphones on* I don't have any time to do actual work.

me: you know you don't have to install all those common programs manually every time you get a new computer from IT, use Ninite.

college: oh I'll definitely check that out
*continues installing manually*

How to bring your zsh start-up time from 7s to 0.2s on macOS:
1. Don't call "brew info", piped to grep, piped to awk
2. Don't dynamically detect the current version of brew-installed packages
3. Don't call java_home
4. Actually don't do anything dynamically. Just symlink shit as they get updated

There you go. Don't be like me. Use the "brew --prefix" command and put its output in your .zshrc, instead of running it every time

!rant
So I've been hearing a lot of fearmongers about general ai fucking the world up somewhere between 5 to 50 years from now.

Now, I'm no specialist, but last I checked, the smartest ai can't understand a reference that points to two sentences back or more.

What are the actual odds for a breakthrough in general ai? One that could replace mundane jobs.

Ok so this has been asked before I guarantee it buuuuuuuut.

I've been meaning to set up a Minecraft server and was curious if any other devRant users would wanting to join in and/or help pay for upkeep?
(Don't need to pay but it would help out if it does get some traction!)

Just comment if you would like to and if I get enough interest I'll look into setting it up :-)

When I get stuck or don't understand why something is not working the way I think it should, I like to walk my self through the code and explain it out loud to myself.

I still don't get it why we don't have code snippet paste ability, like slack or .MD file? Can we have some little formatting please?
Pasting screenshots is not always the best.

Dirty data? More like dirty laundry! And don't even get me started on explaining complex models to non-techies. It's like trying to teach a cat to do calculus. Furr-get about it!

I just work without thinking about whether I want to do it or not. The more you think about it, the more you don't want to do it. Just get to it.

I needed to switch back to my laptop's keyboard (I usually have it hooked up to an external setup) but I'm instantly reminded why I don't like it...

The Up and (eph) button don't work.... can't get code or any decent typing done....

Sho Ha Ri

First, follow the tutorial and don't try to do anything fancy, finish it and have it in a working state

Second, start experimenting, can this be improved? How? Does it still work?

Last, transcend. Develop your own way of doing it.

If you don't go through these stages properly you might get stuck and frustrated and never get whatever you're working on in a working state, resulting in hating the technology.

I don't get it, some stations aren't allowed "internet access" while others are and the reasoning being they don't want people to "abuse the internet" ...

Solutions

access portable Firefox from a USB

telnet

putty/ssh

Fuck you and your ridiculous concerns about abuse, where there's a will, there's a way.

I don't bust my ass to watch the lead IT guy talk all day and make the rounds to listen to his bullshit concerns. Get your shit together guy.

Pro tip: don't get hammered the night before a C# exam because you will regret it

Don't you hate it when you hit your Ballmer Peak, start coding an app to calculate out you Ballmer Peak, then you tip over onto the right side of it and get bored.