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The moment you realize you're just good at googling and not an expert in programming...
That's when the internet connectivity is down!5 -
When I was looking for an internship...
- Hello, I noticed your cv and you have a great portfolio! Are you familiar with responsive design?
- I have a basic knowledge on that, i am not an expert.
- Ok, can you come for an interview on Monday?
-Sure
Monday morning....
Interview with CEO...
- What's your experience with responsive design?
- I have a basic knowledge on that, i am not an expert.
- Sorry I need someone expert
- But the job is for junior dev and it's an internship
- Yes but man hours of someone to training you will be a cost for me.
- Ok, thank you
(Step before closing the door)Btw you should had check my portfolio, 4/8 websites are responsive.4 -
Sorry John Doe, you're application for this job has been rejected. As we specified for this job you need to know about GitHub. In your CV you stated that you are an expert in git but our job requires the knowledge of hub as well. Good luck next time10
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that time when a client wants you to teach a bird how to fly.
but the bird is a penguin
and you are a bear expert
"but it has wings!"7 -
In programming what is the difference between an expert programmer and a noob??
- they both Google when they're stuck but expert knows what he's searching for and noob learns about what he's searching for!!9 -
So apparently someone discovered an exploit in iOS devices which would make shitloads of devices jailbreakable and it can't be updated due to the chip being read-only.
I'm not an expert on this by far but hereby a source:
https://idownloadblog.com/2019/09/...
Again, I'm not an expert on this but it does seem awesome that a lot of devices (if I read it correctly) are jailbreakable now (when someone developed one with this exploit)!37 -
On my first dev job ever, I got sent to the client's office after studying CSS on my own for 2 weeks.
Client: "So, you're the great expert your manager told me about?"1 -
Fun is, when you get to fix the front-end made by a "front-end expert" consisting of bootstrap and a single "custom.css" of 3800 lines.
Peak sadism. 🤡15 -
Rubber duck didn't understand code. So decided to use the expert for Android.
Meet Little Buggy.
P. S. I have 2 more, makes a complete family! 😀
4 -
Me: So, tell me more about what you want me to code.
Friend: Well... Do something nice.
Me: Like?
Friend: I don't know, I thought you're the expert...
Me: You motherf...1 -
So...
I'm looking for my first job as a web developer. I kept seeing these rants about how horrible and frustrating job searching is, all of which I thought were greatly exaggerated. They're all just jokes and memes, right?
Nope.
Every fucking meme seems to be true.
- Junior developer with +4 years of experience, expert in their field - check!
- Listing requirements for 6 different jobs under "Full-stack developer" - check!
- "Expert developer required ASAP" - $10/hour - check!
- 100% remote ... *scrolls all the way down* ... for 2 days of the week - check!
- Entry level font-end position - must be an expert in Vue, Angular, React, AWS, Drupal, Wordpress, PHP, Python, ES9+, OOP, TDD, BDD - check!
- "Cool" description written in js code with no indentation - check!
And I'm not seeing these every once in a while or something like that. No. Most of the posts are like this. I thought I may just be underqualified since I've never had a real job before, but this just seems crazy to me...4 -
Don't lie in your resume or in the interview.
People know you're not an expert at everything, nobody expects that from anybody (and you should really avoid working for anybody who does)2 -
I did an interview with an international company for an "Expert Fullstack Dev." position...
After being praised by the technical team, it turned out that the position was offering a junior salary...
I swear to god...
HR is the cancer of this industry
I lose faith in humanity day by day.6 -
So yesterday I posted a photo on linkedin jokingly that I was the in the top 10 of typescript developers in the country. I know that codersrank doesn’t assess your skill but rather the frequency but my linkedin has blown up 😂😂 think I’ve become a social media expert by accident 🤷🏼♀️
5 -
I'm taking an entrepreneurship course and there is this one guy who talks empty words just to impress others.
He uses linux and at every single course he opens the terminal just to run the commands "sudo apt update" and "sudo apt remove", the rest of the time he is on discord.
He always switches to the terminal so you can see what an 'expert' he is17 -
They made more of those "The Expert" client parody skits (the seven red lines ones)! https://youtube.com/playlist/...
3 -
When you are finish doing the UI of the app then your UI/UX expert suddenly want to change everything, because he/she saw much cooler ui in the pinterest. The Horror!2
-
This is how Pokémon Go shows errors to its users. It says a generic „Error“ in German with different numbers for different errors.
I am not an UX expert, but isn’t this a really bad practice? The error number has no meaning to the user, so why displaying it? I think it is just confusing and looks ugly 😐
8 -
An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field.
Niels Bohr40 -
Linkedin hunter per excellence. They are looking for “an experienced Expert for a position as Junior IT Consultant“.
Well, I have some experience, but someone should really explain them the concept of being a Junior Expert...5 -
A T.A. in my university.
He's kind of a java expert and the class was about advanced oop principles.
But the way he coded live in class and spoke clearly how he approaches the problems was the best thing that I got from the class.
Needless to say, nearly everyone that enrolls in that class, starts to love java afterwards xD1 -
Teacher asks the class:
"How do you become a good developer?"
All the students starts talking about algorithms, problem solving or working in a team.
He nods and starts writing on the board. w w w. g o o g l e . c o m
He then leaves the classroom.
So here I am years later, a master googler and a expert stack overflower.4 -
It's a job description for an entry level Software Developer role at Apple.
Basically they want
- A Front end dev
- A back end dev
- An iOS expert
- A Gimp/photoshop designer
- A streaming data expert
- An Oracle/Teradata expert
- A Kafka expert ( Not shown in the picture)
And on top of that the guy should be able to learn new tech faster.
Do they want a developer or a fucking terminator?
5 -
When the so called "css expert" ask you why you're implementing so many things in @media all and (max-width: 800px) because it "doesn't change anything"
I had to teach him about responsive web design and chrome developer tools mobile emulation...3 -
Love when the client knows more than you and tells you to create a report on an imaginary tool they are 100% sure it exists because their friend is an SEO expert and thinks all pages should be running at a 100 percent on lighthouse. Fml.2
-
Had a meeting with about 5 people, 4 of which showed up, 1 of which did not.
Guess which one was the subject matter expert without whom we spent 55 minutes positing what-if's that could've been easily answered if that individual was there?
Yup. Never rescheduled, and that was the end of that conversation. -
I like coding. I am a professional coder. But I feel I am not very good at it. My colleagues are so creative and fast with their solutions. And here I am, always in awe and never seem to feel like becoming an expert in coding. The thoughts are tiring 😪6
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"What? You aren't sure where the Android Wifi credentials QR Code scanner is specifically located? But.. Aren't you the expert?" Trying not to freaking boil my blood right now.5
-
!rant
Thanks google for giving me the opportunity to work with neural networks without being an expert about them.
http://automl.github.io/auto-sklear...
To sum it up:
1. Preprocess data
2. Use Automl to train classifier
3. ????
4. Profit1 -
So we've got a gif that doesn't show up in our React Native application. Of course, the designers assume it's me: "are you sure the gif is in the codebase? how are you using it in your component"? yeah ok boomer. I'm like, look at this other gif, works fine. "oh" So I tell them, double check the export options on how you are building the gif, maybe there is something there. so now they are asking ME for those export options. I'M A DEV, NOT A DESIGNER, DO YOUR JOB AND FIGURE IT OUT. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT PROGRAM YOU ARE USING
oh as an aside, I was putting up a website for a client and they are like "my logo is quite similar to many others, is this something to worry about legally?" OH, SO NOW I'M A LAWYER TOO??!!?!? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE GOOGLE IS LITERALLY IN FRONT OF YOU
why do people continually think just because we can code we are fucking designers / lawyers / astronauts
/ god?
man this pisses me off - i think of that draw red lines with blue ink expert video, in the end, just smile and nod: "i can do... absolutely anything... trust me, I'm an expert"4 -
Manager: Oh I also forgot, we also have a red balloon... do you know if you could inflate it?
Dev (the EXPERT): ...4 -
Ever had that meeting where it's expected that you will solve cold fusion, catch rainbows and violate the laws of thermodynamics? Just because you are an expert in your field?
Also beautifully demonstrated here:
https://youtu.be/BKorP55Aqvg3 -
That moment when you're hired as expert of technology A, and the first thing that is asked of you, is to do a PoC of tech A integrated with tech B... and then they assume that you are expert at tech B... and to be as fast as working on thech A2
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I have developed 3 apps so far in laravel and I can say I'm in a mid level between beginner and expert.
But every time I set up a new laravel environment I feel like this is the first time I see laravel.5 -
It's a sad fact of life that managing dynamic memory is a very difficult programming task. Some public domain X-Window applications are notorious for leaking like the Apple Computer board of directors -- Expert C Programming4
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That moment when: you lift your gaze from your phone to understand the sudden quiet is because your expert opinion is needed in the meeting.
-
My company started to do very unethical things (or maybe even break the law – I'm no expert) in order to cover up some business people fuckups. I'm seriously considering quitting immediately even though I hoped to stay here for some time as I like the people I work with. It's those unimaginative bastards at the top that make it unbearable.3
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I tried to go for a job as a ReactJS junior dev.. I got my first interview and they liked my prototype.. but..
A week later they reply: "We decided not to go with you because we hired an expert in ReactJS".
Err.. really? You're hiring expert-level ReactJS developers for a junior position?! What the frig.
You want to know what I think? This whole "It's ok that you don't know everything, you'll learn on the job" thing is a hoax. No, the job market doesn't want novices. With every single interview, I'm met with: "but you're not an expert and we can't afford that".
This reminds me of the best advice my professor (seasoned expert in the field, real engineer with more than 20 years experience) once gave me:
"The job market doesn't have the time nor patience to mollycoddle you. When you enter it, you have to already know things to an expert degree because companies want value. They're hiring you because you have these skills and knowledge.
You have to already know what they ask before they ask it. You're required to know things by yesterday, so to speak. It is an exigent industry out there. This is why we bring you the foundations - so that you go further on your own and you can take on any problem"9 -
Wtf is this? I searched for my problem and have to pay money to see the answer an 'expert' gave to another user who needed help? And I don't even know if it would solve my problem. That's definitely a great marketing strategy.
https://imgur.com/a/usPDYxG
6 -
Studying engineering doesn't make you an expert physicist, and studying medicine doesn't make you an expert virologist. Learn the bloody difference, just because somebody has a degree doesn't mean all they say is true and verified, especially if the don't list their sources or talk about it "exclusively" for one media.3
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So the new guy convinces my employer that he is a Machine Learning Expert. Nothing is wrong until He even convinces my employer that he can do Machine Learning with HTML (<==== is not a Programming Language); This is the time my IQ instantly dropped to ```Patrick Star```.8
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You want me to be an expert in advanced data structures, algorithms, dbms, Oracle, python, machine learning, J2EE just to develop apps for you? If I had been a master of all trades, I would not have come to you in the first place.2
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It's 3 years old but for any of you who hasn't seen "The Expert"..
https://youtu.be/BKorP55Aqvg
Still the closest thing resembling my corporate life 🤣3 -
Sh*t. I think I'm going to lose my job bc the CEO thought I was an expert on React even thought I specifically told him I wasn't. I worked at least 12 hours everyday, sometimes including weekends for 4 weeks now. And still got yelled at for not being an expert.
If you tell your manager: "I only used this tech in my spare time", would they expect you to be working at expert level?
I'm very confused and seems like noone is understanding my side.
Feel like sh*t rn because I really need this job because I'm broke but I dont know how to say to the CEO that I warned him and the team lead that I was not an expert. And yet, they treat me like one....10 -
That moment, in a meeting when you are trying to show a technical flaw in a manager idea... And suddenly you have a déjà vu moment from the "The Expert" comic sketch...
-
The more I show up to the office to tackle impossible client demands, the more I realize that I am living in the world of The Expert.
https://youtu.be/BKorP55Aqvg1 -
I just got called an expert for using Linux 😂 I'm taking this computer research in Psychology module (Matlab), and I was the only one using Linux.
-
So I'm no labor law expert or anything, but this just seems off. Anyone know the legality of this?
8 -
When I say I'm in "DevOps" what I really mean is that I'm a full-stack engineer, DBA, system administrator, security engineer, auditor, cloud custodian, cost optimization expert, and everything else that doesn't get its own dedicated staff member here. Pretty much the catch all between developers and customer.
-
I shared this video a while back with some coworkers including my PM and another department that was making ridiculous requests. Didn't change a thing.
https://youtu.be/BKorP55Aqvg
They went as far as to ask me if they ever did anything like that. I, in all seriousness said yes. They laughed.3 -
As someone who often interviews devs, I can say you should be honest about your abilities. Just because you tweaked someone's Python code doesn't mean you are a Python expert. Stick to the facts on your resume/cv. Also, have a good code portfolio. That shows the interviewer much more than a degree does.4
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This movie is so recognizable: "The Expert". Really, a must see for every IT related consultant out there. Not once, I have felt exactly like this guy: https://m.youtube.com/watch/...7
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"Oh, you only know 10% of how these algorithms work? You're now the subject matter expert, so you get to write the code"
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How many of you folks here consider yourself specialist in a certain area? Was this deliberate, and has it paid off? My lead dev is always trying to bestow upon me the advantages of being a generalist in this industry, and yet the employers I have spoken to, on the whole, seem to get most excited by “experts”. If it fits the expert they, want, of course...5
-
Pluralsight said I'm in the 85th percentile of people who know JavaScript and therefore I'm an ”Expert"
So now I walk around like, "bro do you even know how to pass a callback?" 😏 -
Can somebody please explain to me why I need to be an expert at witchcraft & dark magic just to merge 2 SVN branches. And why the fuck anybody still uses SVN when there's git.5
-
Dev bootcamps? I went to one! Probably the best decision I ever made.
They aren't perfect, they're pricey, and they won't make you an expert, but it's a good way to expedite a new career, gives a good base knowledge to start out. -
I don't like how I develop our apps right now. My team leader said that the UI of the App, we are developing, only our UI/UX expert makes decision on how our app will look like. No developer must interfere. It's like shut up and do this. It's practically insane!6
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Some companies: asking for a developer, must have 5 years of experience. Must know C#, php and Python. Also expert in html css react angular and vue. Salary: scrubs. Haha good look looking for the ultimate developer senior for €1800 a month :’)1
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I fixed one problem we had at work with SSL over a year ago. Since then, whenever anyone has any problem vaguely to do with SSL, they come to me. The "expert". So I guess I'd like to become what I'm already perceived as... SSLman1
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The product owner, cum our solutions architect is dumb.
It takes him ages to explain one shit.
Also, he is an expert on triggering useless chaos and panic, thanks to his innate abilities to misinterpret shit.
He thinks everything should happen at 3×10^8 m/s.3 -
When this video (The Expert sketch) became my reality....so many times 😥
https://youtube.com/watch/...1 -
There is a Facebook group I’m a part of called “ReactJS Expert Community” and I can tell you it’s filled with anything but experts. Someone just posted on it asking what the difference between Axios and async/ await is. The only reason I’m part of this group is so I can feel good about myself when I screw up while coding xP
-
[Talk by a security expert. The main point was, complexity kills security.]
7 minutes later a friend via IM: Hey, let's use OpenStack! Just 33 micro services to install! -
i am not a SQL expert, but i can do what i need to do in order to be considered a full stack dev
the syntax i have to learn was deprecated before i was even born -
I just love how everyone on this miserable spinning rock in space has transitioned in the past 3 years from being a virologist and plagues expert to a commerce and finances expert to a
fine art expert to a geopolitics and war expert to an engineering and artificial intelligence expert.
seriously someone messed up something on production in this world, i think we need a reset.2 -
Try out all sorts of things/technologies and find what interests you the most. Go after being an expert in that particular domain. Also, learn by doing.
-
MFW I, a junior dev who just started have to explain what sql injection is to a senior IT person... It's not like I'm an expert in the field, but a little bit of expertise would be nice2
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I was asked to pretend to be an expert to solve a temporary solution for a client in my company. I agreed because I thought it would be a simple solution.
I was wrong.
They only gave me 4 days to train (Including my f*cking weekend) and the project requires a much more experienced consultant since I'm struggling even with the simplest of tasks. Also, the person who was suppose to help me it's not always available. And they are not actively searching for a new expert.
Today I'll talk to my team lead and the person in charge of the project and let them know that this task will require someone much more experienced.
I may get fired but at least my conscience will be clear.
I just feel bad for the client. They are such nice people.7 -
i am becoming our companies excel advanced expert. actually i am just better at internet searching than the rest of us. creating fully automated sheets makes me wonder what all of the office stuff learned during their appreticeship and how they can avoid using office properly while entering everything manually.
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I really recommend to follow the online course of Jonas Schmedtmann on Udemy talking about JS from 0 to expert.
Have you ever heard about it?
I just starting the course some week ago, but i fell very involved by him, i think one of the best teacher on the platform,
Anyway I'm really proposed to hear some feedback or another different personal experience3 -
To keep the search results of a self build webshop after browsing and returning after searching, my client had "the solution" to make the product page picture-in-picture. He's a self acclaimed tech and seo expert.
In the end I solved it with pushstates1 -
- Get to expert level on all my preferred technologies
- Get to travel after graduation
- Strive for a better position at current company
- Contribute to interesting open-source projects
- Hope to not go insane in the process -
I think it was very useful for developing soft skills like time management, teamwork, dealing with failures, the willingness to learn and how to approach a problem, etc.
It's not about learning a technology or programming language super good and be the C++ or Web expert after finishing your degree. It's about self organization and problem solving IMO. -
Why the carrot did people keep asking me about their hacked account? I'm only a programmer, not a social media expert.3
-
At what point are you an expert in C++?
Herb Sutter's talk tilted "Back to Basics" (available on YouTube) contains the message "it's easy to forget that you're an expert" in the context of writing code that utilizes the latest complicated features of a language to squeeze out the last drop of performance.
So what makes someone an expert? Is it just writing production code? Is it groking the entire panel presented by a standards committee member? Is it contributing to the STL? Is it when you can write your own compiler while blindfolded and juggling rubber duckies in under 60 seconds?
What makes a person an expert in any language, for that matter?5 -
My dream dev-power would be to have a prescient warning with a couple years advance on what's the next interesting AND money-raking technology, so I will be already an expert just at start and I could even get a job at the sponsor company.
-
say you're thinking about starting a new project, you have the basics but not really expert in all the aspects required by the project and decided to open source it. how would you get the project more visibility which means more people involved ?4
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These fucking deepshet, spoiled retards
they expert me to build software not from the ground but from the fucking foundation up to release date all by myself
they also expert me to do all required research
also expert me to do the fucking marketing
they expert me to bring new fucking business
They expert me to work at High performance
They expert me to do stock inventory as well
They fucking sit me in shity meetings
WHAT THA FUCK IS THIS SHIT -
Have I said this before? The Google - everything and the Facebook - everything... is SO FUCKED. Seriously... why would anyone ever want to work somewhere with weekend-bootcamp- hackathon quality user interface? You have to be an "expert" in their exact interface of the month just to give them money.1
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hello guys
I recently learnt the django and im not an expert . I pushed a repository on my github
"pouria03".
and i just started to learn DRF(django rest framework) .
do you have any advice for me to help my progress?
I'll be thankful4 -
That moment when you explain to your manager what the term "full-stack" means and next thing you know you've gone from being a "backend c#" to azure migration expert/dba/designer/api architect/network engineer/php wordpress developer... let's go back to when you'd never heard of full-stack
-
My last days at work before changing job. I am an angular expert, and I have contributed to build the first angular enterprise project for my business; during my last 20 days you know what I am doing? Maintenance on a pretty old GWT project that nobody wants to care...1
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Old but gold. The Expert sketch A.K.A. how it feels to be a developer during a project meeting. https://youtube.com/watch/...
-
The worst part about being an accessibility expert in these times is getting a redundant flood of a11y stuff on developer knowledge email subscriptions.
-
CSS is like a deterministic FPGA language; you describe a loop-free dataflow diagram and then switch to a different one to cycle data around.
https://dev.to/janeori/...
This gives me an idea -
Every time when someone tells me they are an expert of ML. I chuckled. I don't know the ML stands for Machine Learning or "MY LEGGGGG' from SpongeBob.
-
So about a big problem I had earlier in the two last weeks, we were waiting for the expert of the team we work with if they have any idea. But we had to wait for him to get back from their one-week break.
We asked them about it
They have no clue
fuck. -
I notice something in the news network.
They can be either bias or don't take a stance.
For some topic their reporting is very bias. Only giving a single point of view and just use facts to confirm it. I call it being bias.
For topic which they can be criticize for taking either side they use the so called "expert discussion"
They gather various expert and discuss about the topics.
Start = Undecided
End = Still undecided with a lot of confusions.
Some people will call it Democratic news channel , Republican news channel. They are wrong. There is only 1 news channel since they are all the same.
I am losing trust on the news channel (which I should not be feeling)
Do you guy feel the same?4 -
Any Vue expert here?
I just want to publish a vue.js component on npm.
I know how to publish it, but I was wondering I have to structure the vue component package.
I read (almost)everything about it, but I couldn't find anything clear.3 -
When I get a code review by my self-proclaimed expert colleague suggesting a change that ends up breaking the feature, I just implement that spaghetti code and let the testers know I'm not to blame.
-
Any Fiverr expert could help me please, I have added new gigs to my account and the impressions and clicks are increasing everyday but I've got no orders for 2 weeks. It's quite strange to me.2
-
Security expert advices over security is like a priest preaching about the way of life. Both of them tend to same thing that it would protect from `evil`
-
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